The Mysterious Samuel Toddman: Chapter 31

Samuel woke up and looked at Vicki resting on the side of the bed. He couldn't believe he was this close to her. For that matter, he was amazed he was still around. Samuel tried to take a deep breath but soon started coughing. Not the thing to do, now his chest hurt.

 At the sound of his coughing, Vicki woke up looking with concern at Todd."You're awake. Take it easy, breathe shallow the coughing will subside. Now, don't try and talk too much. I didn't mean to get you all excited earlier. You obviously have found a way to work with your alters the I would never have imagined possible. I don't fault you, Todd, we both cope the only way we know how."

 "Vicki, wait." Samuel reached up and touched her mouth."Shush." he smiled. "I always knew you were understanding. His memories of you have kept me going for a very long time. Even when I didn't know they were memories. I'm Samuel, and I'm so glad to truly be here with you. When Todd and I headed into the cemetery, I didn't know if we were going to come out." Samuel could see the concern in her eyes when she realized she wasn't with Todd. " Todd's not gone, he's just having a case of withdrawal. Because his body is weak, he's struggling to come to terms with the memories of that night. Ms. Perkins thought it best if I resume my role until he's stronger. I hope you'll accept me for the time being. I assure you he will return, he can come and go the way he used to."

 Vicki searched his face, there was something very comforting about Samuel.  She smiled back at him and said. "I'm very glad to meet you too, Samuel. Thank you for coming by yesterday. Because of you and what you said in the garden, I was able to figure out that you went to the cemetery.  I'm very happy you all survived.  If Blair and Starr hadn't followed you, the attacks would have been fatal. I think I know what occurred back in 2003.  At least what occurred the night Todd disappeared. I don't think you or any of the others have any memory of it because Todd's trauma happened when he almost died. But Samuel, you have one memory he doesn't have, correct?"

 Samuel reached up and touched his scars. He traced the newer one of the two and realized for the first time that it was shaped a little like the letter L, he had never even recognized the shape. He said aloud " The man who carved it said I would always remember him. He said 'L for Laurence' and then I passed out." Samuel met Vicki's eyes. "It was Mitch Laurence who did this. Wasn't it. He was responsible for bringing me out and sending Todd into eight long years in limbo."

 Suddenly, Pete surfaced, turning his cold eyes on Vicki he said. "If Mitch Laurence is still alive I will find him and kill him for all of us, I swear!" Rage was emanating from every pore, the only thing containing Pete was the condition his body was in.

 Vicki spoke quickly "Pete, please I understand your anger, but you're going to hurt Todd and yourself. Let Samuel have control, please." Behind her, Vicki heard the door open again. It was Blair back with the morning papers. "Blair, help me. Pete's in control right now. We've got to get Samuel back."

 Blair came up to the bed and looked Pete straight in his eyes. She had faced those angry eyes many times. There was only one thing that Pete feared and that was death, so she told him the hard truth. "Pete if you don't leave now you're going to die, and you'll kill the others with you, especially Todd. What's it going to be? Are you going to stay and die, or go and live?"

 Pete's eyes closed and his body slumped on the bed. His heartbeat that had started to race when he was in charge return to normal, but he was once more unconscious. Blair looked across the bed at Vicki. "Vicki, you said you spoke to Todd in the crypt. Why isn't he here? We haven't lost him for good have we?"

 Deep in Todd's subconscious mind two men struggled for control and this time reason won out. "You idiot, you're not going to take control at will anymore. Not if I have anything to say about it. Rodd and Tom restrain him again. Right now we need reason and common sense if we're to continue to survive and I'm going to provide that the same way I have all this time. Now everybody rest, I'll be here when it's time to wake up." Samuel closed his eyes and willed himself back into Todd's consciousness ready to take charge when it was time.

 Vicki looked at Blair. She realized that Blair still didn't know that Todd had survived his attempt to face the event that marked his disappearance. "Blair I'm sorry, it must have been a shock to come back to Pete when you were hoping for Todd. I can tell you Todd is back. At least he was earlier. We were discussing his alters and he got agitated. I had to calm him down and managed to get him to drift off to sleep. I dozed off and awoke when I heard him coughing. At first I thought I was talking to Todd again but I found out I was talking to Samuel. Samuel reassured me that Todd is back or at least capable of coming and going at will again but that because of his weakened state, he's withdrawn to get a handle on last night's revelations. Samuel told me he was sent back out to hold down the fort for the time being. Blair, what can you tell me about Samuel?" Vicki looked at Todd, he appeared to have fallen back asleep. She sat back down and took a deep breath. It was unthinkable what it could have meant for Todd if Pete had stayed in charge.

 Blair sat down next to Vicki and said. "It's a long story, but I'll tell you everything I know. My story begins after Eli's death. Eli left me a lockbox and key and it took me a while to even open it. When I did I found a portrait of me inside. I couldn't figure out who would have commission a painting of me, especially when I saw the date on the painting. Vicki, the painting was completed in 2003. The painting was unsigned and so I set about trying to figure out who painted it. Christian and I found a link that sent us to Paris and a small gallery. We met the owner of the gallery and I encountered another picture of myself in his gallery. To say I was stunned was an understatement.”  Blair stood up and walked to Todd’s side. Her hand carefully moved his hair off his face and she looked back at Vicki.

 “The gallery owner informed me that he had sold a number of paintings all of me over the course of seven years. He was surprised that I didn't know the artist because the artist certainly knew me. As luck would have it, Samuel delivered a new painting that same night and Tomas, the gallery owner was able to get his name finally. And so the search began. Christian drew a sketch of Samuel from Tomas' description of him. Vicki, I almost fainted when I saw that sketch.  It was a picture of Todd.” She paused and again looked at the man sleeping so peacefully.

 “Through some investigations, Tomas and I found out where Samuel lived and I went to confront him," Blair remembered when he opened the door that night, it had been like time had shifted back to another night during the year they met. The night when their whole relationship had changed. For one brief moment, she'd been that same Blair looking for someone to share her misery and Todd had been perfect.

 Blair smiled and looked back at Vicki. "Vicki , when Samuel opened the door it was unreal. I fainted and Samuel brought me around. I was so mad when I woke up, I started blasting him for staying away for eight years and I wanted to know who he was getting to paint all the pictures. Samuel was so confused. I had called him Todd and he didn't know who that was. Then he told me he could prove he was the artist and proceeded to do a pastel of me that very night. That's when I realized that I was talking to one of Todd's alters and that they were real after all. Samuel informed me he didn't know why he painted me, just that he would get images and put them down on canvas. Vicki, he apologized for upsetting me. Todd hated apologizing for anything. Any questions so far?"

 Vicki had been listening intently to all that Blair was telling her. When Blair mentioned Samuel just picking up the canvas and doing an on the spot picture of her, Vicki was very intrigued. She remembered Samuel saying she had been with him for some time.  How was that possible?  She asked. " Blair, you say he painted pictures of moments with you. Did he paint anything else?"

 Blair nodded , " Samuel's apartment was full of paintings, some of me but also many of you and Tea. He called us his muses. He had two beautiful paintings on his mantle, one of you and one of Tea, in fact those are at the penthouse here. Yes Vicki, he's back in the penthouse. Starr and Hope moved in with him a couple of days ago. The night we met, Samuel told me the only memories he had were of the last eight years, everything before that was a blank. Samuel's memories have been returning since he spotted me accidentally in Paris. The only memory that was eluding him was the memory of the night Samuel appeared. That memory, according to Samuel, was the link that was keeping Todd trapped. You should know that we believe someone had Todd for several months after he was injured and tampered with his mind. Samuel's been tracking down some leads and we believe that the experiments done on Todd might also have been done on Walker but that's another story. Right now I'm concerned with getting him well enough to go home but we've got another problem on our hands now. Look at these." Blair handed Vicki the newspapers she had left at the foot of the bed.

 Vicki looked at the headlines, it was as she feared, the media had jumped on the sensational side of the event last night.

 The Banner's headline read "PUBLISHER'S DOPPELGANGER SPOTTED" the story went on to speculate why a lookalike for the Sun's publisher Todd Manning was being taken from the tomb of Todd Manning's Father, Victor Lord. The reporter had a picture of Todd on the gurney.

 The Sun's headline was just as inflaming "RESURRECTION: HAS VICTOR LORD RETURNED FROM THE DEAD!" Questions as to whom was taken out from the tomb, alive but in need of medical attention. Somehow they were going to have to tread carefully. Neither Samuel nor Todd was in any shape to face the questions that were going to start coming.

 Vicki looked at Blair. "I'm not sure whether this can be stopped but we can make sure that it's held at bay until Todd is ready to step forth. We both know it's only a matter of time before he's going to want to regain his life and there are a lot of people it's going to affect when he takes that step."

 Samuel woke and listened as Vicki and Blair sat talking, it was a little unreal to actually hear their voices. The whole time he had been alone with their portraits he had imagined how they would talk to him. Now they were real, two women he loved, talking about protecting him from the events about to unfold. He smiled and looked over at them "My lovely Muses, as always you continue to support me. But you're really here now, not just in my imagination. It's remarkable."

 Vicki and Blair moved to his bedside. Vicki looked at him and said. "Samuel, I'm glad you're back. Are you feeling any better?"

 "Well that's relative, Vicki. Compared to being dead, I feel marvelous, but truthfully I feel like someone stomped all over me. Still I'm here." Samuel looked at Blair  "When I left yesterday, I thought I was saying goodbye for good. I thought once Todd faced his demon, he'd no longer need me and I would cease to be. He wouldn't let me face the tomb. He shut me out and went in alone. We were all trapped unable to help because we didn't know what he was facing. I don't understand. I thought we were here to protect him, but he protected us instead." Samuel's eyes went from one face to the other than rested on Vicki's. "Do you know why he did it?"

 Vicki nodded, she had started to tear up when Samuel was talking. Her thoughts went back to the last thing Todd had told her. "Samuel, you might only be a fragment of Todd but to him, you're one of his brothers and he wouldn't let anyone hurt you or destroy you. He's protected his connection to you all these years because he didn't want to lose any of you. Years ago when Tom and the others came out, Todd almost lost you.  Pete inadvertently made the alters look unreal and we all thought Todd had manufactured his alters to escape prison. Todd decided to let us believe the worst of him because he knew his secret was once again safe. When he went into that tomb, he knew you thought you were going to have to go with him and you were willing to sacrifice yourself for his sanity. He shut you out, even though he knew he was taking a big chance of losing himself once more, because he cares for you as much as the others. Todd has always had an unusual way of protecting the ones he loves. He thinks differently than the rest of us do. It's both infuriating and endearing."

 Vicki paused letting Samuel absorb what she had just told him. She had a feeling life around Todd was forever going to be different now that some of his loved ones knew his alters were so real.

 Samuel smiled, "I'm grateful to him, he gives us life. As do you Blair. Did you have something to do with keeping us alive?"

 "Forgive us Samuel, but Starr and I couldn't let you go alone. I had an inkling you were headed to the cemetery so we followed. We were outside the tomb for just a short while, waiting for you to come out. Vicki showed up so we followed her in and found her beside you. You were having another heart attack. We got you laid down and did CPR until the EMT's arrived. Starr rode in the ambulance with you. You had two more attacks on the way here. I expect Starr here shortly she'll be so relieved you're still around. We've come to love you Samuel and we don't want you permanently gone. From what Vicki says we can have both you and Todd and the others and that's okay with us. You are all Todd, no matter who is out at a given moment." Blair gave Samuel's hand a squeeze and took a moment to move his hair out of his eyes again. Then she grinned and said, " Well except for maybe Pete. You guys really need to limit his time out."

 Ruefully Samuel grinned back, "Ah, yes. He is a bit of a handful, but he and I came to an understanding earlier. For now he's under house arrest till he gets his temper under control. Now I heard you both talking when I woke up, what do you have to keep a lid on right now?"

 "You're no longer invisible, Samuel. When the ambulance headed into the cemetery last night. It brought the reporters out. Further excitement was generated because of where you were found. Victor Lord’s Tomb is an unusual place for emergency help to be called in for. Well here, look for yourself." Vicki showed Samuel the papers and then sat down.

 Samuel took the papers and glanced at his sister. She was looking a little pale. "Vicki is something the matter." At Samuel's words, Blair looked over at Vicki.

 "Vicki are you alright?" asked Blair "Can I get you something? You didn't eat did you? You need to take care of yourself."

 Looking at her watch, Vicki realized she was late taking her anti-rejection medication. She got her purse and pulled out her medicine. "Blair, I lost track of time. Could you get me some water? I'll be alright, I just need to take these." Blair went and got her some water and she took her pills. Then she just sat back and rested.

            "Hey! What's going on? Vicki, why are you taking medicine, the cancer isn't back is it? Come on tell me the truth." Samuel was worried.  He didn't like the way Vicki looked. "Vicki do you need a doctor?"

             Blair quickly turned back to Samuel. He was getting agitated and he needed to know about Vicki. "She's alright Samuel, but she forgot to take her medicine on time. Vicki had to have a heart transplant some years back, but she has to continue to take anti-rejection medication or she could start to have a problem. It isn't a recurrence of cancer. Are you doing better Vicki?" asked Blair "If you want I'll get the doctor."

 "I'm doing better, please Samuel, your heart is a much larger concern than mine right now. When you're better I'll tell you all about me, for now you need to calm down once again. Blair, you were right I do need to eat something. What did you bring me earlier?" Vicki asked "I could do with a little something right now."

 Blair handed the bag with the muffin and apple and said. "You eat and then you're going to go home and get some sleep. Your daughters need you too. I'll stay and keep Samuel company and Starr should be here any moment now. I won't say anything to the press other than what you told the Doctor. Samuel is your cousin. No one needs to know different."



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The Mysterious Samuel Toddman: Chapter 30

 Blair and Vicki followed the ambulance as it left the cemetery. Vicki knew they were in for a media circus. There was a sizable crowd at the gates.  Most were wondering who would need an ambulance in the middle of the night at a cemetery. Everyone loved a good ghost story and when word had come into the Banner's Newsroom of the EMT call to the cemetery, they had wasted no time getting a reporter to the scene. In typical fashion for reporters, The Banner's investigator had managed to get a ringside seat outside of the crypt. He had managed to get pictures of the name on the crypt and one, of the man being carried out on the gurney.  As he was about to head back in, the reporter spotted some of The Sun's reporters also there. It was going to be a race to see who scooped who tonight.

 Once outside the gates, the ambulance had gone to the hospital with sirens on. When Blair pulled in behind the ambulance at the ER, she and Vicki watched as they wheeled Todd in. Blair looked over at Vicki, she had been quiet for the drive to the hospital, they both had been lost in thought. Blair wondered if Vicki was up to what was about to take place now that Todd was home. But then again, she wondered if she was. Blair and Vicki joined Starr as they stood outside the room where the doctors were working on Todd.

 "How's he doing?" Blair asked.

 "Mom, he had another attack in the ambulance, they had to shock him to bring him back. Mom we can't lose him again. We just can't." Starr replied anxiously.

 Vicki looked at her niece. " Your father is the most stubborn man I know. He won't let a thing like a heart attack take him out. I'm sure of it." Deep in her heart Vicki prayed that was true. She really wanted to be able to see him with his eyes open and wisecracking some joke about how Lord Hearts are really made of Rubber, and they always bounce back.

 The doctor finally came out to talk to them. "Mr. Toddman is stable and holding his own right now. The attacks have ceased, but his heart is very weak. If he makes it through the next 24 hrs without another attack, he'll probably pull through. We're going to send him up to CCU soon, do you know if he has any family here?"

 Vicki spoke up, "Yes, we're his family, he's a cousin of mine. Will we be able to see him."

 "That shouldn't be a problem, but they'll probably only allow up to two at a time." said the Doctor.

 "If I may, I'd liked to take first watch. I need to be here when he wakes up. Starr, you should go home to Hope, and come back in the morning. You too Blair. Thank you for saving his life in that awful place. If you hadn't followed him there we would have lost him for sure. You understand why I need to be here. It's been so long. and for some reason I think he needs me too." Vicki looked at them both silently pleading for their understanding.

 Starr knew her aunt had just found her brother again. She, on the other hand, had the knowledge of the last few days to keep her hopeful. Her dad had survived so far, she would pray that he would make it through the night. The morning wasn't that far off. She would go to Dorian's and give her daughter a kiss, and make arrangements to come back without making Dorian suspicious. She looked over at her mom. "I can do that Mom, let's let Aunt Vicki spend some time with him. Just let me go in and give him a kiss from me and Hope.   You can drive me home and check on the boys too."

 Blair looked at Vicki and Starr and knew it was the right thing to do. She didn't blame Vicki for wanting some alone time with Todd, she had already gotten some great time with him and had hopes there would be more, but Vicki had just found out he was alive. It was fitting she should have some time with him right now. " Certainly Vicki, it's only fair. I agree, I think he needs you right now, too. Do you want me to call Charlie and let him know where you are?  I know the last few days have been in such turmoil concerning Jessica and Natalie. Are you sure you're up to this?"

 Vicki said, " I'm stronger than you think. Todd was in that crypt for a reason and I sense it had to do with Victor again. If he's battling demons then he needs someone who's been there to battle with him. I’m going to do just that. I'll be fine.  I would appreciate if you would call Charlie but don't alarm him, he's been through some rough times too. Starr, go give your father some encouraging love. I'll wait."

 Starr went in and stood by her father's head. She leaned down and whispered in his ear. " Dear Sir Dragon you must rest, I and Princess Shorty would be lost without you. How else are we going to get back up to our castle in the sky? We love you!" She gave him a kiss on the forehead and let her mother say goodnight to him too.

 "Goodnight Todd, we're not finished yet. Remember you and me against the world, I'm holding you to it." Blair gently kissed his lips and moved some hair off his face. She stood up and left the room with Starr. "We'll be back in the morning, take care of him," she said to Vicki with a hug and then they left.

 Vicki went to her brother's side. He looked so tired and pale. She looked at the monitors and for now his heart was beating pretty regularly. She couldn't help but think of the cruel joke that life had played on them. The last time she had seen Todd in this hospital was when their father died. Todd had been trying to get Victor's bogus will to Mitch replaced with one that would keep the Lord money and holdings in the Lord Family, but he had failed. What had been so touching about the moments following Victor's death was that Todd had been concerned for her more than anything else. He had wanted Victor to own up to his crimes against Vicki and had felt like the old man had managed to cheat Vicki once again.

 Vicki sat down next to Todd and just looked at him. She knew the man on the bed was her brother like she knew how to breathe. She felt the connection immediately like strings that had gotten knotted up and couldn't get untangled. It was ironic that she was sitting here praying that Todd's heart was stronger than hers had been. What a joke, all of her father's machinations to get a heart to make him immortal.  It was obvious the Lord heart was no bargain.  Both She and Todd were proof of that.

 Todd started moaning, the doctors had said he was sleeping. She could see his eyes moving under his lids. He must be having a nightmare. She reached up and took his hand. "Todd, it's alright, you're safe. I'm here. You're not alone." for a moment his hand had grabbed onto hers like a vise then it slowly relaxed, she let the air out she had been holding. For a brief moment Todd's heart rate had increased and started beating irregularly. She had been so afraid it would seize again. For a while he seemed to rest peacefully, then he took a turn, his temperature started to spike and he began to toss and turn. Suddenly he grabbed her hand.

 "Vicki" he whispered. His eyes were opened but she didn't think he was aware. "Vicki we've got to get out of here. You can't stay. You're not safe here. Father's here, he's coming for me. He wants my heart, he told me. If he sees you, he'll hurt you again. You need to get help. I can't escape for long. They were holding me down Vicki. Peter and Victor; they told me I was worthless. Vicki, I tried to get free, but Peter wouldn't let me go. He told Father he would hold me and Father could do what he pleased. God, Vicki I tried.. I tried to get free but I couldn't I was bound I couldn't get loose. Vicki, Father! Vicki, he smelled like Death, I saw Him. He was standing over me with a knife and he said he wanted my heart. I thought I saw Sam, but then I couldn't see him anymore. Vicki, you have to get help!”  

 Todd’s eyes looked at a place behind Vicki and suddenly he squeezed her hand hard. “Look out Vicki, he's here, Father's here, go hide. Don't let him see you. No Father, don't take my heart, PLEASE NO!" Todd started to get up.
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It was everything Vicki could do, to keep Todd on the bed. Alarms had started going off and soon the doctors and nurses were in there. The heart doctor gave Todd a sedative and stayed till his heart once again stabilized. The sedative put Todd into a deep sleep where he wouldn't dream.

 Vicki watched anxiously as the doctors settled Todd once more. Her own heart was doing a number as she recalled what she had just heard. Was it possible that what she had just heard, was what Todd experienced in the tomb the night he disappeared? If it were true then no wonder he fled those memories. Todd's trauma with his father Peter had already done a number on him years ago. What if Blair had been right. Blair had believed that Todd had been encased with Victor. Could Mitch had been that cruel. Todd had talked about Victor's smelling of Death. My God, he'd been buried alive. He couldn't have lasted long without oxygen. If he was deprived too long, he must have truly believed he was with Peter and Victor. Someone had removed Todd from the Tomb. Most likely it had been Mitch and someone had carved that second scar. In his delirium Todd had been seeing Victor come at him with the knife. When he thought Victor was indeed going to take his heart , Samuel must have taken his place. It was beginning to make sense. That's why they had never met Samuel earlier. In Todd's mind Samuel was Sam, the man he had always counted on and loved like a father. Todd had turned himself over to Samuel for protection.

 Vicki's eyes filled with tears as she realized everything her brother went through that night. She'd had believed like everyone else that her brother had once again done something horrendous when he disappeared. She couldn't have been more wrong. To top that guilt, was the guilt of knowing that she had accepted Walker as her brother without really investigating if were really true. Of course they had all been fooled by Walker. What didn't excuse her was that she hadn't helped Blair more right after Todd disappeared. If she had put her contacts to work when he first disappeared all of the last eight years might have been different. She wiped her eyes. It was behind them and none of it mattered now. Now she was here and she would stand behind him and help him get his life back. First they had to get him better. Then they would face the firestorm that was about to overtake Llanview.

 Todd was resting more comfortably. Vicki took the moment to step out and get some tea from the nurses station. Everyone had been very supportive because they thought they were watching over her cousin. Luckily no one on staff knew her brother except Marty and Marty was currently having her own problems at St.Anns. She took the tea back into Todd's room and sat down again. The doctors reported that his vitals were improving and they were removing him from the critical list. He was still considered high risk for another heart attack so he was remaining in CCU for the time being. They were also concerned that he hadn't come around yet, and had ordered certain tests to make sure he hadn't sustained any neurological damage from lack of oxygen. Vicki prayed that the tests would come back negative. It would help if he would wake up. Vicki heard the door open and looked to find Blair entering the room.

 "How's he doing, Vicki, has he been awake yet." Blair inquired. She was carrying a bag with her. " I've brought you something to eat. You have to take care of yourself, Todd has no idea you've had your own share of heart troubles. He would never forgive me if I let something happen to you. I talked to Charlie and Natalie, they know you're here and I told them they didn't have to come up that I would keep you company. They both seemed a little relieved that I was going to be here because of what they're going through right now. You can go if you need to and I'll call if he wakes. Has he said anything?"

 "I'm not going anywhere till all of the tests come back and he awakes. I need to be here when he does. You need to sit down. Something happened last night and I think it was crucial to Todd's sanity, you need to hear this. " Vicki gestured to the chair close to her and Blair sat down. " Last night, Todd was semiconscious for a time, he began telling me something, I don't think he was really aware  at that moment; I believe he was reliving his last moments in the Tomb the night he disappeared. Blair, I think you were right. I think Mitch sealed Todd in the tomb next to our father. The terror he lived during the time he was in there played havoc with his mind. What he went through was real to him and when he could take no more he left, and Samuel took his place. I also think Samuel is Todd's way of hanging on to Sam. He received that second scar that night and I think Mitch gave it to him. From what Todd told me, I don't think he has any memory of Mitch actually cutting him. I think Samuel took over before that occurred."

 "My god Vicki, You really believe Todd was entombed with Victor for a time. He must have been terrified. It's a miracle he's not insane. Did he say anything else?" asked Blair.

 "He didn't have a chance. His heart started acting up and it took several long minutes to stabilize him. They gave him a sedative to make him sleep deeper and he's been sleeping quietly for the last few hours. They've taken him for a couple of neurological tests to make sure he didn't sustain any damage when his heart stopped. That's what I’ve been waiting for and also some sign he might be waking up." Vicki got up and walked around a little bit. "Blair, I know there were reporters at the cemetery last night.   Have you seen anything yet?"

 "I haven't seen a paper this morning. You're right, there must be some questions out there now. I'll go to the gift shop and get the papers. Who knows what they saw last night?" Blair got up and headed for the door." I'll be right back."

 Vicki wandered over to her brother. "Todd, I'm sorry. After everything you went through with Peter, you shouldn't have had to deal with our Father. All your fears of the man and what he did to me, played on your mind so much you were unable to separate illusion from reality. Please come back Todd, it's time to wake up. We can face your terrors." She gently stroked his cheek, thinking of all he had been through in his life. She looked up to his eyes and realized he was looking at her. "Todd, are you awake? Can you hear me?" She held her breath because she wasn't sure if she was talking to Todd or one of the others.

            "Hi, Sis. Miss me?" Todd smiled. Todd looked at his sister for the first time in eight years. She was as beautiful as he remembered, the years had been kind to her. She had some tears in her eyes so he started to reach for them. "Ow, what the hell.." he winced, his chest felt like someone had been using it for a punching bag.

"Easy, just take it easy. Todd you've had three heart attacks in less than 24 hours. You need to lie back and relax, I'm going to ring for the doctor." Vicki reached for the call button and pressed it. The doctor arrived quickly and checked out Todd, then spent the next few minutes explaining to Todd everything that had occurred concerning his attacks and subsequent treatment. Vicki watched her brother closely as he was being examined. She could tell Todd was still experiencing residual effects from the trauma he'd recalled. She saw the tightening of his jaw as the doctor was feeling along his ribcage, she knew he really didn't want to be touched. Todd had watched the doctor the entire time waiting for any move that might hurt him. Vicki saw Todd's tension release as soon as the man left, then Todd turned his gaze back to her.  She smiled at him and finally answered his question. "Yes Todd I missed you. Now I know you're feeling a little spent but are you up to a few questions."

Todd grimaced he had a feeling he knew what her first question was going to be. That day in the cemetery when she was blasting him for his betrayal he had never felt so bad. He had almost admitted the truth but had known she wouldn't believe him. He let her believe the worst, because she hadn't been totally wrong. He had used her. He knew what Victor had done to her and how she had struggled with her alters. It had been cruel to use that to his advantage. Now she knew the truth. She knew he also had alters and she knew he lived with them very differently than her.  It was time to admit the truth and take the consequences. He looked at her and nodded. " Go ahead."

"Todd, are you alone?" Vicki asked quietly.

Boy, he hadn't expected that. Might as well get this over with. "No." he replied.

Vicki takes a deep breath, " Can I talk to Tom ?"

"Wow, this is a great room!  Hi Vicki. long time no see. Boy, Todd sure has missed you. but I took care of him when he was gone. Gee, that was a long time. He hasn't been up for very long and we've been working night and day to get him out." Tom said.

Vicki sat stunned. She had speculated that Todd knew his alters, but she never realized how much control he had to come and go. "Tom thank you for taking care of him. Can I talk to him again."

"Sure thing, Hey Todd she wants to talk to you again." Tom was gone.

"I'm sorry Vicki, I really am. What we did was unforgivable. This might sound strange, but they're like my brothers. They've kept me company for so long, that when I went catatonic they took it into their own hands to help me out. When I regained some control everything was out of my hands. I didn't want to go to jail, so I let them retain control. The day of the trial is a blank for me, I remember being with Tea briefly the night before but don't remember anything again until Tea and I were at your lodge. When I came back I knew it was best to let you continue to believe I was a pretender. I just wanted to be here with whatever family I had. As always I messed up again." Todd stopped talking. He was finding it hard to breathe.

            Vicki had been listening intently, letting him talk. When he suddenly stopped. She looked up and saw the monitors. Todd's heart rate was increasing again. She quickly went to him. Cradling his hands in hers, she began reassuring him "Todd, it's alright. I'm not upset. I understand more than you know. Don't panic, take your breaths as slowly and deeply as you are able. That's it, I've got you. I'm not going anywhere right now. Blair's going to be here shortly. Starr and the baby will be here later. Relax. Don't try to talk anymore. There you go. It's ok, go to sleep." Vicki watched as the heart rate slowed back down. When she looked back at Todd he had fallen asleep again. She tried to move her hands, but he gripped them tightly, so she sat next to him on the bed and let him hold them till he was fully asleep. She sat back down in her chair and rested her head in her arms against the edge of the bed. She was tired and drained by the events of the last few days, the tears welled up and started flowing as she sobbed quietly for her brother. Though half asleep he heard her, Todd gently laid his hand on her shoulder and fell back asleep.

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The Mysterious Samuel Toddman: Chapter 29

Starr glared at Samuel. "You can't do it. You know you're not strong enough. My god Dad, you had a heart attack several days ago and I know you're still having problems. If you try to face your secret now, you'll kill yourself. Why don't you just wait a few more days at least? Dad, you don't have to be Todd Manning any more. Let Walker be him. Just be Samuel. I love all of you and I'd rather have you as Samuel then not at all. You know you can survive just the way you are, Dad. Do that, and be happy. I'm not going anywhere and Mom's right here too. Please?"

 "I can't just be me anymore Starr, I don't feel all here. With each memory that has returned I realize I'm missing something. I'm here to help Todd and he should be here. Don't you see, Todd made me keep his place so he wouldn't be lost forever. I can't usurp his life, I'd be just as guilty as Carlo Hesser." Samuel walked over and gave his daughter a hug. "It's going to be alright. I'm not the only one who'll be helping Todd. We'll put up as much of a united front as we can. I need you and your mom and Hope to be here. You will be our lifeline. I'm counting on it. Now I have to go out. There are a few matters I need to take care of before this evening. I hear Hope. You go check on your daughter, I'll be back later." Samuel smiled and left.

 Starr watched him leave feeling helpless. She started up the stairs to Hope when her cell phone rang, it was Dani, Starr debated answering but couldn't. Dani wanted to talk about Walker and Starr just wasn't ready to face him yet, much less be reminded of how different he and her dad really were.

 Samuel got down to the garage level and got his car. He wanted to see a few people today and let them get a glimpse of him. If everything worked out tonight Todd would be back. Samuel wanted some of the people who knew him, to get used to the idea he might still be around. It was about time he got everyone questioning who Todd Manning really was? It had been eight years since his face had been seen in Llanview. Well, today it was going to be seen again. Might as well start at the papers. Let's see how observant some people are. Samuel parked his car down at the end of the block from the entrance to the Sun. He got out and took a stroll to the front entrance. Good, the security guard was still the guard Briggs had hired long ago. Now to have some fun. "Hey, Phil, everything quiet today. You're looking good, have you been working out?" asked Samuel. The guard looked at him and replied "Everythings great, Mr. Manning. Thanks for noticing I have been working out." Samuel nodded his head and sauntered off. He wondered how long it would take the guard to realize what he had seen. It didn't matter right now but a few days from now it would.

        Next, Samuel decided for old time's sake to check out Todd's old haunt, the police station. If he got lucky maybe he could give Nora and Bo a quick look. He walked in, thinking of all the times he had been brought in by the cops, Samuel was amused when he remembered all the times Todd had been turned loose for lack of evidence.

     An officer came up to him. "Sir, is there something we can do for you?”

“Yes, I was wondering if Commissioner Buchanan or his wife might be in? Oh yes, they are, but they look busy.  I'll just wave and try and catch them later when they are free. Thank you, Officer." It was perfect, they were both in Bo's office. Samuel moved to stand in front of the window to the office. He stood there for just a moment staring, then he caught Bo's eyes. He smiled and gave a little wave. Then he quickly turned and exited the room before the shock had worn off. It was delightful, Nora had seen Bo's expression and turned to see what Bo had been looking at. Samuel had given her a quick wink also. He quickly disappeared into the mass of people going to and fro in the hallway. He knew Bo wouldn't be able to move that fast.

 He still had to give Vicki and Tea a glimpse before tonight. Especially Vicki since he was headed into the cemetery tonight. He just had this feeling, if Vicki knew he was around, she might come looking for him. He was hoping that would be the case. First though he'd check on Tea. He got out to Manning's home. There were a couple cars there, so they appeared to be home. They were coming out together. This was perfect. He could get in another jab at Manning and let Tea see him at the same time. He pulled up behind their cars and rolled down his window. They had started coming toward the car as he said "I just wanted to say what a couple you make. Have a good day." The whole time he was talking to them he kept his eyes on Tea. He had made sure she got a look at him before he drove away.

 Llanfair wasn't far from Manning's house. Samuel got out at the back of the estate and headed for the back patio one last time. Vicki was working with her roses. He stopped and watched her. Should he say something or not. Samuel wanted to step forward and let her see him.  He wanted to be able to touch her gentle face and hear her scold him.  She, above everyone else, deserved to know he was alive. He stood in the shadows ."Vicki," he said. 

 Vicki turned to see who had spoken, the voice had sounded familiar. She saw him standing under the tree, she couldn't see his face. “Excuse me, but if you wish to talk to me, could you please come out of the shadows." Vicki started to walk closer.

  "Stop Vicki."  Samuel stepped from the shadow and let her see him. 

  "Todd?" Vicki whispered. She wasn't sure what she was seeing. "Todd is that you?"

  "No, Vicki, I'm Samuel, Todd isn't here right now. Yes, you heard correctly. Todd isn't here with us at this moment. I need you to just listen. I am your brother, your real brother. I'm here with Rodd and Tom and Pete and Ms. Perkins, and yes, Todd. Something happened and we've been lost. Tonight we hope to come home. I had to see you, I needed to tell you how much a part of me you are. You've been by my side these last years keeping me sane. I know you don't understand anything I've been saying. If the worst happens tonight, I don't want it to be like the last time I disappeared. I wanted you to know I love you. If after tonight I'm unable to come and explain fully, you can talk to Blair or Starr. They know everything. Take care." Samuel turned and left quickly before Vicki could say or do anything to stop him. If she knew what he was going to attempt. She would try to stop him and he wasn't sure if he'd be able to say no to her.

 Samuel was definitely feeling the pressure. Blair and Starr had been on his case since he had gotten home. Starr had called Blair and told her his plans. Talk about a united front. Samuel recalled how Todd must have felt when they had ganged up on him. Still he had to stick to the Plan. "I've heard what you're saying, but this has to be done. Wait for me.  I hope to be home by midnight. If I'm not, then come looking for me." He held open his arms and took Blair and Starr in. "I want to come back. You've given me hope that there is a life for me here. Trust me." Samuel grabbed the flashlight and left.

 Blair and Starr followed close behind. They dropped Hope off at Dorian's and headed for the Cemetery. Blair knew he was headed there because he had disappeared there. She was sure the trauma had occurred the night he disappeared. Whether he wanted help or not, she and Starr were going to be close by. His brain and the alters might be ready for this encounter, but both she and Starr felt his body wasn't. If it gave out they wanted to be there to save him.

 Night had fallen, Vicki was pacing back and forth still trying to take in what had occurred earlier. She had seen Todd, she was sure of it. Not the man she had thought was Todd all these years but the original. She had seen his face and heard his voice. She recalled the last time he had said goodbye to her. It had been after she had chastised him for using her illness to get out of jail. She had been so hurt and so mad that he would do that to her. She remembered how his voice had cracked when he had said he was sorry. His voice had cracked today when he told her he loved her. Try as she might she had never heard him say that before. Todd had always kept his feelings well hidden. But it wasn't Todd who had said it, was it. He said his name was Samuel and that he was one of Todd's alters. Surprisingly, that hadn't been a shock. She had always suspected that Todd did indeed have DID.

 Samuel had spoken of something that was taking place tonight, he had sounded so ominous. He had sounded like he was saying goodbye again. Why had he shown himself if he was just going to leave again? Something Samuel said reminded Vicki of his disappearance eight years ago. He had said they had gotten lost and then he had mentioned the time he last disappeared. That was the time of Sam's death. Todd had been the one they all had thought killed Sam, but it had turned out to be Lindsay. Father's ring had been found at the scene, but she knew Todd had been the last one wearing it. How had Todd lost the ring? Blair had been sure Todd had been taken by Mitch and it wasn't until Walker came that they found out that was the truth. She couldn't think of the current Todd right now.

  All her thoughts were on Samuel.  So the new alter was named after Todd's good friend. Vicki wondered if Samuel or Todd knew that Sam was dead. If he didn't that was going to be a shock. Samuel had told her that Blair and Starr knew what was going on. She had been trying to get a hold of Blair, but her phone was turned off and she hadn't had any luck with Starr either. Vicki stopped as a thought occurred to her. Whenever Todd had needed to think, he had always ended up at Victor's crypt. Was it possible he had gone to the cemetery tonight? That would be easy enough to check.

 It was already dark by the time Blair and Starr arrived at the cemetery. Samuel had already been here for a while. They didn't see him among the headstones. They would have to go in deeper. Blair looked at Starr. "I think I know where he might be. I think he's at your grandfather's crypt."

  "Mom, why would he go there?" asked Starr 

 "Because that is where Mitch held him long ago. Whatever happened that night must have been horrible," said Blair. "Here it's this way. I hope he's alright."

 The sun was setting when Samuel arrived at the cemetery. They were all present, Todd and the other alters. This was something they would all face together up to a point and then it would be he and Todd. He walked through the gates of the cemetery and began moving among the headstones. A cold chill had settled around him. As he went through the headstones, he found himself having to watch his step the ground was uneven, suddenly he tripped. Samuel went sprawling on top of a grave. His flashlight was beaming at the name on the stone. Samuel went very still. "No! It couldn't be. He couldn't be dead. Sam!  Please tell me I'm reading this wrong!" Samuel saw the date March 14th, 2003. “NO!!!!!” Samuel screamed in despair. He staggered off the grave. Running away, he had to get away. Samuel and Todd were both reeling and it was all he could do to catch his breath. Why hadn't he remembered? What else was ahead? He kept running, then falling to his knees he started to cry. Through his tears, he looked up and realized what was in front of him. Suddenly his very breath seemed to turn frosty, he was at Victor's tomb.

 Todd stared at the scene in front of him, that tomb beckoning to him.  It seemed to be welcoming him.  Samuel no longer had control, he watched as Todd got slowly to his feet. Todd took slow unsteady steps toward the door. Something was waiting on the other side. He had no choice. He had to know what awaited him. Pushing open the door Todd stumbled into the crypt. He remembered Mitch taunting him, telling him that Sam was dead. He had thought his heart was breaking. The only man who had ever treated him like a son was dead. He had wanted to kill Mitch three times over, but he couldn't, he was bound. Todd stumbled to the floor staring at the tomb that held his father, then he wasn't on the floor any longer, he was laying next to his father watching the lid drop down.  “No, don't!"

  He tried to scream, but he couldn't, he was gagged. Darkness, Mitch's taunting voice then silence but it wasn't silent for long. He was laughing, that hated voice was laughing at him again. No, he had to get away. Father was laughing, he was coming, he was going to hurt him again. Todd couldn't move. 

 "You miserable excuse for a son, can't you ever do anything right? You're weak, I'll teach you some strength. You can't hide from me." Todd could see him grinning as he pulled his belt free. More laughter coming from across the room Todd couldn't see who it was. 

"Bravo Peter, he's a disrespectful whelp.  Hmmph, Lord heart. He doesn't deserve it. Let me have the heart. I know what to do with it, he's not worthy." 

The gag was gone, but he couldn't breathe it was so hard to breathe, the old man, the pervert was leaning over him, he wanted to gag, the smell so overwhelming, he had to get out of here . “Can’t breathe.”  That dead smell, what was it?  There was that laughter again, fingers grabbing at him holding him down. 

 "Victor I hear you like them young, he might be a little long in the tooth for you but he's such a girl. Here I'll hold him have some fun." Those hands tearing at him 

 "No don't touch me!! LEAVE ME ALONE!! " He couldn't breathe , so cold, so dark.. Wait a light.  Someone coming toward him, "Help!, Someone help," Sam, it's Sam, He'll help, he always helps "Sam Help me!" 

 " I can't Pal, I'm dead, You're on your own with this one." 

 " NO, WHERE DID HE GO? SAM!!!!!" CAN'T BREATHE, GOT TO GET SOME AIR!" Hands grabbing him holding him down, that hated voice, "Get away..leave me alone.. please let me be.. I'll be good..let me be...can't ...breathe......too hard to breathe...hurt everywhere got to breathe”   What's that?  A knife, no he wants my heart. “GOD DON'T LET HIM TAKE MY HEART!” utter Darkness…

  Samuel looked up that knife inching closer, the voice taunting "I'm going to mark you so you'll never forget me. L FOR LAURENCE, " Samuel felt the knife touch below his eye then carving down his cheek, then no more pain just silence..

  Todd's eyes flew opened, agony shooting through his chest! God not again! Can't breathe! "Blair..Starr ...Someone help"..There she was. He knew he could count on her."Vicki, help me! Please!" and he passed out.

 “TODD! My god what's the matter?" Vicki knelt down. She tried to feel for a pulse. She heard footsteps behind her . Turning she saw Blair and Starr enter the tomb. "Something's wrong I can hardly feel a pulse. What is it?"

 "Aunt Vicki call 911. Mom, he's having another attack. You have to do something." said Starr.

 "Starr, help me lay him down. You breathe for him and I'll do the chest compressions. Ok, now, that's it ..again...again...wait .let me check, no keep going...again... Come on Todd, I'm not going to lose you a third time. Again Starr...again..." Blair prayed the ambulance would get there soon.

 Vicki knelt beside her brother. Looking at Blair she asked, " The ambulance is on the way. What did Starr mean by another attack? When was the last one?"

 Blair looked over, "He had an attack several days ago. He wouldn't go to the hospital, you know how he hates them. Samuel insisted on coming here tonight, he said he had to free Todd. Was he successful? Did he talk to you before he passed out? Was he Todd?"

 "I believe he was. Oh god, what has he been through? Where has he been? Keep him alive, Blair. I think I hear the EMTs. I'll get them." Vicki got up.

 Todd was in bad shape, but they managed to get his heart going again. Blair had Starr go with her father. She offered a ride to Vicki and headed for her car.

  Vicki took a look around shaking her head and sobbing. "You ruin all of us. Now you might have taken your son too. Will it never end?" she closed the door and left the dead where he belonged.


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The Mysterious Samuel Toddman: Chapter 28

The next few days were the happiest days Samuel had ever experienced. The penthouse had never seen so much activity. Blair and Starr insisted they would do everything. The only chore they gave him was to keep his granddaughter occupied. Samuel lost no time doing just that. Soon he and Hope were laughing their way through Sir Dragons magical forest, all the while actually winding through all the boxes and stuff brought over for the move. Then they were making their way up to the home of Princess Shorty as they struggled up the great mountain to reach the castle in the sky.

 Starr watched as her dad took Hope through their journeys. She had promised her Mom that he wouldn't overdo anything. She was worried. Samuel was getting stronger since the attack, but she had seen him pause now and again. He was still having some sort of problem, but he wouldn't talk about it.

 That first night after the heart attack, when they finally had a chance to really sit and talk, Starr had been stunned by all the revelations. Samuel and her mom filled her in on what they could remember of the night he disappeared. Samuel was still struggling with the event of that night, but he was able to fill her in on the last eight years. They had also explained how he was Samuel and not Todd. The funny thing about that was, it didn't matter the name he went by, he was her dad, She saw him when he smiled at her or played with Hope. She also saw him when he'd watch her mom doing something.  He would get a look in his eyes and she knew her Dad was there at that moment.

 They had long discussions about the man who had raised her the last several years. All of a sudden the differences between Samuel and Walker seemed obvious. Like her mother, Starr had begun to think of him as Walker, they no longer saw him as Todd.

 Starr had a dilemma on her hands. She hadn't seen Walker since he had manhandled Dani's boyfriend. In fact, she was still trying to make Dani understand where her father was coming from. That was another problem. Both she and her mom had decided not to tell Samuel about Dani yet. They were uneasy about dropping another bombshell on him right at the moment. All of them were in agreement that it was best if Jack was also kept out of the loop. He idolized Walker and really had no memories of his real dad. Samuel didn't need rejection now, he needed support. Tea and Walker were relatively happy, so it was decided that their lives would not be disrupted yet. Still eventually Samuel or Todd was going to make a public appearance and claim his life back. None of them wanted to think of who would survive the fallout.

 Samuel had put Hope down for her nap when the doorbell rang. Starr had the water running in the kitchen, so Samuel answered the door. A messenger handed Samuel a package. He paid the young man a tip and walked back into the living room. He knew that what he held in his hands was going to change things once again. Samuel walked over to his desk and picked up his letter opener and opened the package. He sat down on the couch and started reading.

 Starr walked out of the kitchen and saw Samuel reading a bunch of papers. "Dad, who was that at the front door? Is everything alright?"  It didn't look like Samuel had received good news. She saw his knuckles turning white as he crushed the edges of the papers.

    "Dear Mr. Toddman, enclosed is a copy of our findings concerning the Kipling Neuroscience Research Facility. At your request, we have managed to uncover the names of the persons backing the facility.  This is a list of all backers, please note that one of the backers is indeed Carlo Hesser. Per your other request, we've managed to find out that the facility has had several research projects concerning tapping into the deep subconscious. One such project funded by Mr. Hesser was a Memory Transference Project known as REMSWITCH. We also discovered a second Project being studied and tested in conjunction with REMSWITCH known as the BLINDSIDE project. This second project involved Brain Manipulations. According to some of the results, they had a high degree of success, with a number of subjects. This project involved the use of new brainwashing techniques being studied for the military and some high tech micro hardware used on the test subjects brains. It is said to be so successful the army is using it to create spies who infiltrate a situation by literally becoming someone else. These spies are so manipulated they are no longer aware of their original pasts."

 Samuel didn't need to read anymore. He now knew what Hesser did all those years ago. He had somehow ended up in Carlo Hesser's hand and Carlo had used the situation to his advantage. Carlo had experimented on him in his weakened state and managed to gain access to his memories. Then some poor man had been given Todd's memories and with the help of some high tech machinery, he had become Todd. Carlo had victimized them both. Samuel was sure Carlo and the facility had been handsomely paid for the Projects and then Carlo had sat back and enjoyed the Show he had created on the Llanview Stage. Samuel wanted to strike out at something so bad. Now he knew why Pete was always held in check. Right now, he wanted to kill Carlo Hesser.

 Samuel put the papers down and smiled up at Starr. "It's OK Starr, I just got some information I've been waiting for. You might want to read it. It's a report of a facility I think I spent time in after my accident. It's my belief that the people in the facility messed with my memory. My contact says that two research experiments were underway at the same time I was missing. I have three unaccounted for months. I also believe that my impostor might also have been experimented on. I believe he might have been the recipient of my memories. That's why he was able to fool all of you. He's as much a pawn as I am. He truly believes he's me. I don't know much about the years I've been away. I think both you and your mom are trying to shield me. Please, I need to know more of what happened in my absence. " Samuel patted the couch next to him. "Talk to me.  Please."

 Starr sat down next to her dad. She wasn't sure what to start with. "Well, I know you've been wondering about Hope. I'll tell you if you promise to not get mad. You're going to hear things that are going to hurt, but they're not about you. Please know I don't blame you for anything that happened. I'm sure you already figured out I'm not married. My boyfriend and Hope's father is in jail for murder. But the man he killed was an evil man who tried to kill Mom and almost killed Tea. The man who died was Eli Clark, Mom's late husband. My boyfriend's name is Cole Thornhart. Yes, Dad, Patrick and Marty's son. I made a foolish mistake a couple of years ago. Hope is the result of that mistake. But I love her dearly and don't regret keeping her. I know you want to know where Walker was during all of this. Walker has always been over the top protective of me and there was an incidence in high school that turned him against Cole, He's never been able to accept Cole since then." Starr awaited trying to gauge how much more she could tell her dad.

 "Do you want to hear more?" Samuel just nodded. " Ok, I mentioned Tea.  Tea came to town to help Walker.  He was in jail for kidnapping and raping Marty Saybrook."

  At that, Samuel got up and started to pace. "What do you mean rape?"

 "Ok Dad, please I need you to sit back down. Please your heart. If this is so upsetting I won't tell you anymore." Starr was frantic. She wasn't getting through to him.

 Todd was seething. He knew Starr had already left out parts of her story with Cole and now she was telling them that Marty had once again been raped. Just what kind of man had been living his life, but he knew the answer. Once a rapist always a rapist. This impostor believed he was capable of atrocities because Todd knew he was capable of atrocities. Ms. Perkins came up beside him and put a hand on his shoulder. "Todd, you've got to pull him back and yourself with him. We almost died the other day. Don't you feel it. We're in danger again." Then he realized what Ms. Perkins was saying, the heart was beating too rapidly and was starting to skip beats, he needed to calm Samuel down. "Samuel, you must stop. We can't take the strain. Think of Hope, Samuel. That's it. Our little granddaughter. Remember how she looked when you tucked her in. Good, Samuel, we're alright now. You need to reassure Starr."

 Samuel had been seeing red when he heard Todd. What was he saying? Think of Hope. Samuel pulled his thoughts away from the danger zone they were in and concentrated on Hope. He recalled how she had looked so peaceful in her sleep. Samuel took a deep breath and let it out slowly. He felt a hand on his arm and followed it to the concerned face of his daughter. He patted her hand and said "I'm Ok, but you were right, I’m not up to these revelations. I'll need to wait a little longer before hearing anything else. Why don't you pour some wine for me and get a soda for yourself and I'll tell you some stories about Paris." For the next hour, Samuel told Starr about the beautiful city he had lived in.  As always, Starr found his stories charming and humorous. She had truly missed this with Walker. Had she been so desperate to have her Dad back that she had just overlooked the little things that Walker had lacked?  The little things that had made her Dad special.  Like his knack for storytelling and his affinity with children. It was so obvious now. Samuel had stopped talking and was looking at her quizzically. She smiled and leaning over gave him a hug.

 Samuel's night was once again filled with nightmares. He felt like he was in a maze, but everytime he tried to retrace his steps he felt a pain in his head. When he started going forward again and the pain eased. He reached a door and opened it. He didn't enter he merely observed what was in the room. He saw the night he raped Marty. It was like looking at a movie screen as the whole sordid crime played out, then the door slammed in his face. Once again he was being directed forward and another door appeared. Now he was looking at Blair and watching their lives crash and burn with every falsehood that stood between them, but every so often something beautiful would emerge from the shattered pieces, Starr and Jack. The door slammed again, Samuel tried to open it but it was locked.  Why couldn't he get it opened again? More doors opening, more memories, and then suddenly locked away from him. Finally he came to the last three doors. He couldn't get them opened. The forces that had pushed him along howled in anger. He was terrified but he couldn't open the doors. Two doors were more terrifying to him then the pain that was assailing him. He didn't want to open them. The last door held something so essential to him, he couldn't let someone else have it. Samuel knew somehow that those three doors could and would only be open when he wanted them open and no one was going to make that happen by hurting him. Suddenly with one last inhuman shriek the push ceased. He was just drifting, out of the maze but feeling empty.

 Samuel awoke. That had been no nightmare. That had been a memory, of that he was sure. Even though Todd had been unconscious, his subconscious had retained the memory of the research that had been performed on him. Samuel knew what the one room had contained. Todd had hidden his Alters in the one room and because of that Carlo had not been aware of them. Samuel feared the other two rooms held the dark secrets that Todd couldn't face. Samuel had the key to one of those doors. Could he and Todd survive if he opened it?  Samuel felt that deep chill go through his body. It felt like death warmed over. Samuel wasn't going to get any more sleep. An enormous weight was beginning to weigh him down. Samuel had to find something to lift it. He headed downstairs and walked to his supplies grabbing a blank canvas and his paints.  He set to work painting a portrait of Hope. This might be his last chance to paint and he wanted Starr to have it. Letting his imagination take over he painted his beautiful little Hope as Princess Shorty on the back of the magnificent Black Dragon flying through the clouds toward her castle in the sky, guided only by a single bright Star in the night.

 In the morning Starr found her dad asleep on the couch. She had been worried when she went past his room and found it empty. Starr could smell fresh paint and knew Samuel had been painting. After carefully covering Samuel with a blanket, she opened the gate to his little studio and went in to see who he had painted this time. Her little Hope, he had painted Hope. Starr's heart felt like it was breaking, Samuel had only known Hope for a short time, but the love he felt for her just jumped out at Starr. The look of pure joy on Hope's face as she rode her great Dragon was priceless, as was the love that shown in the eyes of the dragon towards Little Hope.

 Starr knew he had painted it for her. Samuel was sure that he would somehow be able to get her Dad back but that he would no longer be around. He had wanted to give her a gift from him, Samuel. Starr looked over at her dad. She didn't care if he was Samuel, or Tom or any of his other alters, she loved him and she wanted him alive. She wished he would give up this idea of facing that awful secret. If it had been so bad to send her Dad so deep within himself, Starr feared this time it would take his life.


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The Mysterious Samuel Toddman: Chapter 27

Samuel sighed and turned into Blair's embrace. He looked into her eyes smiled and said,"Just you and me against the world. Right, Blair?"

There he was. Todd smiling the way he always did when they would start one of their schemes. Blair reached up and moved his hair out of his face. "Yes, you and me, and don't you worry, we'll make them pay, the ones who did this. You'll see." She let him go and moved back to her wine. She turned back to him and said," Remember this one. House Rules. Well, these are the new House Rules. No more recriminations. What's past is past. You got that buster. You're back and you're going to get back everything taken from you or my name isn't Blair Cramer." She smiled, raised her glass in a toast to him and drank what was left in the glass and threw it at the fireplace, laughing.

Samuel chuckled, "Looks like I'm going to have to get new glassware." He moved back to the couch perching on the end the way Todd used to do. "You know, thank you for giving me back my son. Can you tell me about him?"

Blair replied " I can do that and more," she grabbed her purse and opened the wallet then she removed two pictures from inside and handed them to Samuel. "Jack just started High School, he’s just like you. Impulsive, very direct, he tells it the way he sees it."

Samuel looked at the picture of a young man in his teens. He had been much younger when Todd had seen him last. He saw himself in Jack's young face. This was a confident young man who wasn't hampered by all the baggage his father Todd carried. Jack appeared happy. Samuel then looked at the second picture that Blair had handed him. A beautiful young woman holding a lovely child smiled up from the picture. He recognized his Starr. She was all grown up. His little girl wasn't little any longer. He closed his eyes remembering all the adventures and secrets they had shared when she was younger. Well, he couldn't roll back time. He started to hand the pictures back to Blair, but she stopped him. "You hang on to those Samuel, I have others." He looked at Blair and carefully stored the pictures in his wallet, then he said. "Blair, I need to see Starr.  Can you get her here?  I know it will be a shock. but it's important to me. It's important to Todd. I won't ask to see Jack yet, but Starr is older she deserves to know the truth."

"You're right Samuel, she of all people deserves to know you're alive. I'll try and bring her by tomorrow afternoon. Will that work for you?" Blair answered.

"That will be fine, Blair. I sense that I don't have much more time. Ever since arriving here in Llanview, I've felt this pull. I almost followed that pull this morning. I would like to see Starr, she's always given me the will to survive and I think I need that boost right now. Todd especially needs to know that you and Starr will be waiting for us. But I'm getting ahead of myself. I just recalled something you said in passing on the telephone earlier. You mentioned meeting someone on the plane from Paris. Someone you said had a connection to Carlo Hesser. Who was it again?" he asked.

Blair looked at Samuel. She was worried about him. What was this talk about not much more time?  God, she thought  I just got him back. Am I going to lose him to that memory already? One way or the other I've got to make sure he knows both Starr and I are going to be here this time and we're not leaving. She heard him change the subject. Blair knew he was trying to take his mind off that fateful moment. "Oh, yes I remember. That's right. The person in question is named Alex Olanov she used to be married to Carlo Hesser. Why the interest?"

"Because, Blair, I encountered a charming woman in Paris named Alex. We started off just having a drink together, but I sensed something was off and wasn't going to see her anymore. That same night I got it into my head that she might have been sent by the people who've watched me these last eight years. In fact, I spent an entire afternoon with her the same day you showed up at my door. She had been trying to get information and I believe she had been sent to wrap me around her little finger. I'd thought I might be able to glean my own information from her, but she got skittish and then she suddenly had to leave town. It's my belief that whoever is behind her is behind all of this. Now you tell me that she is connected to Hesser. The same man who's been buying my paintings for a number of years. Blair, I think Carlo Hesser is the person who did this to me. Now I have to find proof. I'm hoping my contacts will find a link between the research facility and Hesser. If there is one, then I'll be able to concentrate on just what the facility is researching."

Samuel got up and moved to the window staring down at Llanview. "You know, Todd hates this town. I feel it in my bones. Don't get me wrong, He loves you and the kids, Tea and Vicki, but he can't stand the town. There is a blackness in this town that eats at him. I don't know if I can help him purge that hatred or not. If he survives to return, he'll need all our help to remain.

****

Samuel had spent the morning painting a portrait of Starr. He pictured her sitting in the middle of a bed. In front of her on the bed was a tea set. She was laughing at something Todd had done. He remembered her saying. "You can't fool me. You're My Daddy." Samuel was worried Blair wouldn't be able to get Starr to the penthouse. He'd suggested that maybe Blair could try and talk Starr into setting up a home for Hope in the Penthouse. He had been surprised when Blair had thought that was an excellent idea. She had taken his suggestion one step further and told Samuel that he should have Starr and Hope come live with him. He had never even thought of that possibility but the longer he thought about it, the more he was taken with the idea. He had given Blair a key so that it would look like the realtor was letting them look at the place. They had made plans for Blair to have a little trouble with the key so he would have time to retreat upstairs. God, he was so nervous.

Blair had also been busy, finding ways to get Starr in the mood to move. She had had Jack bust in on his sister bright and early yelling something about Sam letting his pet mouse loose upstairs and he had just seen it run into Starr's room. Then she and Langston had monopolized the bathrooms for ages so Starr almost missed her morning class at LU. When Starr arrived home, Blair then suggested she might want a place of her own. "You know Starr, your father's old Penthouse is available. Maybe we could go take a look at it this afternoon. You're already familiar with the layout and they have that great Daycare on the ground floor for working residents. Hope would have excellent care and you would be able to concentrate on your studies better during the day. What do you say? Let's take Hope and go have a look." Starr had actually perked up at the thought. They had bundled up Hope and headed out.

All the way there Blair was thinking about the reaction Starr was going to have. She decided that the best way to reveal Samuel was simply to let Samuel and Starr come face to face and work it out from there. Ok, we're here. I hope Starr can take this. I know what I experienced the first time I saw him. They parked in the garage and took the elevator up.

“Gosh Mom, it seems like forever since we've been in the penthouse. Dad sold it right before we were to move to Hawaii. Then everything happened with Cole. We were so happy right before all of that. I'm a little scared. I wonder what it looks like now?" Starr said and then hugged Hope and said, " This is where Mommy grew up. Wait till you see Hope." The elevator stopped and they walked to the front door. Blair got out the key and made a big show of having trouble with the lock. "Here Mom, you take Hope. I can get the door." Starr got the door unlocked and opened it. Blair let her enter first and followed with Hope.

Starr walked in.   In some ways, it looked exactly like it had when they had left but the furniture was set up totally different. "Mom, are you sure this penthouse is still available. It looks like there might be someone already living here." Then she saw the portraits on the wall. She had never seen them before. There was her Aunt Vicki and Tea and My God was that her Mother! She looked at her Mother "Mom! when did you pose for that!"

Blair had the grace to blush, but spoke up quickly, "Starr Manning, I never posed like that with anybody."

"But Mom, where did they come from. I've never seen them before, I would have remembered." She went up to the portraits but saw no signature. She was able to make out three dates. The ones of Aunt Vicki and Tea had been painted in 2004 but then she saw the date 2011 on the one of her Mother. She turned around smiling. "Now I know you're not telling me everything. These paintings all just have dates and no signatures just like the one you took to Paris. Are you going to stand there and tell me you didn't meet the artist? Mom, how could you allow a perfect stranger to paint you like that?"

"Starr, I did not go over to Paris and have a fling with an artist and these are not my paintings.  I brought you here to look at the Penthouse I wasn't aware it was occupied. Why don't you look around a little more I'm going to get some water for Hope. " Blair said and headed for the kitchen.

Starr noticed the Easel sitting over by the window and the paint supplies sitting around it. Her curiosity got the better of her and she went to see the canvas on the easel. Starr could only stare. It was of her as a child.  Who was the artist who had painted all of these? How did he know her? She had only been four when her father had gone through a weird time in his life. But she remembered the tea party she and her daddy had that day. Aunt Vicki had called her dad Tom that day. She didn't understand till later about DID, but she had been told her dad had pretended to have it. She loved her dad, so she had never judged him. How had this artist known about that moment? Aunt Vicki and Dad had been the only other ones in the room with her. Suddenly Starr heard a noise on the stairs behind her, She turned and looked up.

He stood there looking at his beautiful daughter. She was so grown up. Samuel felt such love for her. She had seen him. He wondered just what kind of reaction he was going to get from her. "Hello Starr. I didn't mean to startle you."

"Who the hell are you! What are you doing in my Dad's penthouse. And who do you think you're going to fool with that makeup job. I don't know what game you're playing at, but someone should have told you about my dad's new face. You don't look anything like Todd Manning now. Wait till my dad finds out about you. Man you're in trouble." Starr spoke angrily.

"Now just hold on Shorty, I'm not trying to fool anyone. This is my penthouse, it was before you were born and after. This makeup job isn't makeup, it's my face. And although you don't believe it at this moment. I'm your dad." Samuel couldn't believe how frustrated he felt. What was he going to do now? How could he prove to her he was her father?

"Whoa," Starr had never seen him angry before. Wait a minute,had she just thought that? For one brief moment she had felt like she was hearing her dad. Just who was this man. He had rattled off his comments the same way her dad used to. Why had he said he was her father? He called her Shorty. What was going on? He had made it to the bottom of the stairs. He looked at her, then walked over to the painting of her by the window.

"This is a memory I loved, it kept me going back then. You were so little but you had such a big heart. You had apologized to me because you didn't have real cookies so I grabbed some from my stash under the bed and was eating them and talking to you at the same time. You told me to stop eating with my mouth full. Then your Aunt Vicki came in the room, she had brought me some clothes. She called me Tom and you wanted to know who Tom was. So I explained that my whole name was Thomas Todd Manning and some people called me Todd and some called me Tom. But what you said was the best thing of all,"  he turned and looked right at her. "“You said, you can't fool me, you're my daddy. That meant the world to me. You mean the world to me. If you don't believe in me then I might as well be dead." Samuel waited watched her. He had nothing else to offer but his love.

Blair had returned from the kitchen, she'd had never heard what happened the day when they had met Tom. She remembered how she, Max, Kevin and Tea were all skeptical of the DID. She also remembered the day after when she had insisted Todd stop what he was doing or she would take Starr and leave. Now she understood why Pete had come out. He was protecting Todd and his relationship with his daughter. One of Starr's tape players was running that day and the tape ended up being played at the worse possible time. Todd had stoically accepted the censure of his loved ones and let them think that he had been faking. Now she understood what he had meant the last time they had wed. He had tried to tell her how his head was full of voices and how she kept them at bay. In his own way he was telling her his secret, it just hadn't registered.

Starr didn't know what to do. She looked at his face. He was the older version of a dad she hadn't seen since 2003. Where had he gotten the second scar? She didn't understand what to believe. If this was her dad standing here, where had he been for so long? If he loved her as he said, why had he left? She was so bewildered.

Samuel could see the thoughts run through her mind. She didn't know whether to believe him or to continue to chastise him for being a fraud. He had hoped that just seeing him would be enough but now he knew different. "I am not an impostor Starr. I've been gone all this time because I had no memory of who I was until recently. To make matters worse, I have one more confession. This body standing in front of you is your father's body but I am in charge of it right now. My name is Samuel and I am one of your father's alters."

"Now I know you’re lying. My dad doesn't have alters. He just pretended to be like his sister to get out of prison. Mom, you tell him. He's lying right?" Starr looked over at her mom. "What kind of lies did he tell you in Paris. This is the artist of your painting right? I don't know what you told my mom but I'm telling you, whatever your planning, it isn't going to work. My dad knows all sorts of people. They'll figure out your scam."

It was time she spoke up. Blair walked across the room and joined the two of them. There was only one thing she could think of at the moment that might work. She walked up to Samuel and said, "Samuel, I'd like you to meet your Granddaughter Hope." then she handed him Hope.

Samuel looked at his granddaughter. She was adorable and so much like his Starr when she had been little. " Hello Princess Shorty, are you a good girl for your mother, the queen of this domain. Well let me introduce myself.  I'm Sir Dragon and I've known your mother for most of her life. I even came to the rescue of your grandmother once when an ugly King was threatening her. Now I'm here to protect you. Would you allow this Dragon to serve you." Hope giggled and hugged her new found friend. Samuel hugged her back as tears formed "Thank you Princess Shorty, I'll take that as a yes." He looked at Starr and said. "She's beautiful, Starr."

Starr gazed at Hope and her dad. In one moment she saw the truth. There, standing holding her daughter, was the man who had filled her life with wonder. Here was the dad who, long ago, had named her Princess Shorty and had stood between her and anyone who would hurt her. She remembered all the stories he used to tell and act out for her. He was here again, looking at her with tears in his eyes begging her to believe in him one more time. Not understanding any of it, she threw logic out the window and did what her heart told her to do. Starr flung her arms around both her dad and Hope and held onto both of them for dear life. With tear filled eyes, she looked at her dad and said, "I've missed you Dad."

Samuel couldn't catch his breath, as he held still and just enjoyed the feeling of his daughter's arms around him again. His heart felt ready to burst, suddenly Samuel felt a sharp pain rip through his chest. He gasped for breath. "No! Not now!"

Starr saw the look on Samuel face change from joy to pain. He suddenly turned so white, "Dad! What is it? What's the matter? Mom take Hope." Blair had rushed over at Samuel's gasp and quickly took Hope from his arms. Starr helped Samuel to the bottom stair and sat him down. He was clutching his chest and looked about ready to pass out "Mom I think it's his heart. Call 911. Dad, you're going to be alright we'll get help."

Samuel reach out and grabbed Starr's arm. " Aspirin .. in . kitchen.. get .." he was starting to lose consciousness. He felt for the rail but couldn't move his arm any longer then there was nothing.

Starr had rushed to the kitchen to find the aspirin when she heard her Mom cry out. She grabbed the bottle and ran back out to the living room. "Oh no, Dad!"

Blair had just finished the 911 call when she saw Samuel collapse on the stair. She ran over and laid him flat on the floor.  God, his heart had stopped. She began CPR and felt for a pulse.  He had one. She knelt there looking down at Todd barely breathing. "Don't you die on me. We just got you back. You can't come back and then leave again. It's not right. Thomas Todd Rodd Pete Samuel Ms Perkins Manning don't you leave!" His breathing became easier and then he slowly opened his eyes. "Todd, we're getting help, stay with me."

He smiled weakly and said  “I'm not going anywhere."

Starr joined her mother at her dad's side. " Mom, is he going to be alright?" She looked down into his eyes and smiled at him. "You've got to stick around, I don't have Freddie the frog any longer. So you can't leave. Besides, Hope needs the best storyteller around to tell her the 'real' fairy tales. Come here Hope, keep your grandpa awake. Sing a little song for him." The doorbell rang, Starr handed the aspirin to her mother and went to let in the EMTs.

"I'm not going and that's final! Look I'm much better now, I'll take full responsibility but I'm not going to the hospital." said Samuel.  He looked over to Blair for some assistance. "Please, I promise to see a doctor for a full workup, but I can't go to that hospital. I hate hospitals."

Blair looked into Samuel's eyes. She knew why he was avoiding the hospital but she was worried he was putting his life on the line. "You heard him, gentlemen. I promise to take him to my doctor first thing tomorrow." She led the EMTs to the door and saw them out. Then she returned to have it out with Samuel. "Are you crazy! You just had a heart attack. You should have let them take you."

“Blair, Starr, I can't go to the hospital. Not here anyway. Besides I know what they're going to tell me. I've known for eight years. The injuries I sustained eight years ago did some damage to my heart. It's weaker than it used to be. But all my doctors assured me that I could still live a long life, I just have to watch my stress." Samuel looked at both of them, silently begging them to help. "Before you blow a gasket Blair, I'm aware that I'm preparing to try and take my life back and that is going to be very stressful, that's why I need your help. Starr, I have a request, would you consider moving in with your old man. You could keep an eye on me and make sure I'm not getting too carried away. I think having you and Hope around could be the best medicine for me." He grinned and picked up his granddaughter setting her on his lap. "What do you say Hope, do you want to live with Sir Dragon?"

Starr glanced over at her Mom, she shook her head, and looked back at her Dad and said, "Well someone needs to keep an eye on you, that's for sure. Yes Dad, we'll move in with you."

"You hear that Hope. Welcome to Sir Dragon's Cave." Samuel said happily.

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