Diamond in the Rough: Chapter 13

The next morning, Todd was up just after the sun.  He checked on Ray, who was actually awake, just sitting in his crib and entertaining himself with a few items put in with him for good measure.  He went to the crib, and looking in, he said in a whisper, "Hey, Little Man, how ya doin'?"

For a moment, when Ray looked up at him, he reminded him so much of Jack.

"Hey, Jack.  Hey.  Happy Birthday.  So, um, what do you want for your birthday, huh?  'Cause I was thinking about gettin' you a Bengal Tiger, is that gonna be okay?"


The image of baby Jack, sitting in his crib, much the same way, fluttered through his mind.  He touched Ray's head.  "I love you.  You know that, right?  And I love your mother.  I love her so much."  Ray smiled, directly into Todd's face.  He looked back into the baby's eyes, and smiled back at him.  Then, he felt a small pain in his throat, and he closed his eyes for a moment.


"I gave my kid away to strangers, my own son...She loved you so much, and I took you away from all that.  I screwed up.  I did.  Me, Todd Manning.  You know, I can't go back and erase what happened.  All I can do is tell you that I'm sorry.  I'm sorry, Jack . . ."

A shadow moved, and he looked up to see his eldest at the door.  "Hey."

"Hey.  Dad, I need a ride today, after school?  I'm going to Jenna's.  I'm going to see her art, and she wants me to meet her sister.  So, is it okay?"

"Yeah, sure, it's fine.  I'll tell Williams to expect it."

"Can you pick me up?"

"Me?  You mean, in a car?"

"Yeah.  Like a regular kid.  Is that okay?"

"Sure.  That's okay.  I'll work it."

"Thanks."

"No problem.  You okay, Jack?"

"Yeah, Dad.  I think she likes me.  Can I show you something?"

"Sure."  Jack walked away from the door, and Todd followed.  In his room, Jack pulled the picture out of his bookbag and handed it to Todd.  

"That's really good.  Actually, it looks like you.  In fact, I think it is you."

"I just noticed that today."

"She's pretty good."

"Yeah.  The art teachers at school want her to do an art show.  They think she is really good, I guess.  That's why I want to see her work."

"Wow, well, that's cool.  See if you can find out more about her situation.  Maybe I can help."

"I will.  Thanks."

"Jack, you'd tell me if something was still bugging you, right?"

"Yeah.  I guess so."

"Better."  He reached out and messed his hair.  "Get going to school, I'll get Sam up."

"You don't have to, Dad.  Sam gets up every day like clockwork.  The kid doesn't even need an alarm."

Sure enough, from around the corner came Sam, and peeked into Jack's room.  "Hi, Jack, and hi, Dad."

"Hi, Sam.  Good morning."

"Morning."

"Let's get ready for school, guys.  The copter will be ready in about a half hour or so.  Okay?"

"Okay, Dad."  Sam said, and Jack, already headed to the shower, answered as well.

Todd went back into his bedroom, and quietly sat on the edge of the bed, when he felt Blair's hand on his back.  She said, "You're a good father, Todd.  I know what Jack said to you yesterday brought you painful memories, and I'm sorry.  It doesn't take away what you do for them."

He wasn't sure what to say.  She had said it before, and it still felt the same every time.  It wasn't that he doubted her words, because he knew that since his return to the living, he was working at exactly what she said.  And for the most part, it wasn't even working.  It just was.  It was the past that troubled him, and he wondered more often than not if his actions from the day Jack was born had a lot to do with the troubles his son was having.  He lowered his head.

She sat up behind him and wrapped her arms around his chest, hugging his back.  She said, "What's wrong?"

"Nothing.  Just, seeing Ray this morning in his crib, for some reason, I thought back to Jack.  Remember his first birthday?  I had to break into the house to see my own son.  And I brought it all on myself."

"Yes, I remember," she said.  She could still remember standing at the door and listening to him pour his heart out to the baby.  I so love this man.  "You were sorry.  It's been forgiven.  That's enough, Todd."

"Okay,"  he sounded less than convinced.  

"You're worried about Jack."

"Yeah.  I am."  He took her hands, and turned toward her.  "Do you think he. . .knows I love him?"

"Yes.  I know he does."

"I don't know, Blair.  I never know if I am really doing right by them.  I don't have much to measure up to in my own life.  I'm just going with it, you know?"

She nodded, and looked into his face.  She loved him, so much, and his deep love for his children made that stronger within her.  She said, "And that makes it all the more beautiful.  You just love them, and it's so totally enough.  Come on.  Come back to bed.  I'll sing to you."

They both turned on their sides and slid under the covers.  He faced her, and touched her hair, as she sang quietly to him.  He could not help but close his eyes.

***

The day passed quickly, and at the end of their study hall, Jack and Jenna loaded into the city bus that stopped at the corner and sat together.  The bus was a bit warm for the time of year, and the sun was coming through the side windows and a top sunroof.  Jack removed his jacket, and Jenna handed him an apple she had left over from lunch.  "This should hold you until we get to my house."

"Thanks," he said, biting it.  Chewing, he said, "So, what's your sister's name?"

"Lynnette."

"Lynnette?"

"Yeah.  I know.  It's sort of . . . I dunno."

"Okay, Lynnette."  He chewed more, "I hope she likes me.  Did you say she has custody of you?"

"Well, not legally.  But she took over when my mother left."

"When did she go?"

"More than a year ago.  We moved into Llanview Center.  I used to go to Sacred Heart.  The Catholic High School?"

"Yeah, I heard of it.  Why did you leave?"

"We could not pay the bills, it costs money.  So I had to transfer, and we moved to a smaller apartment in the city."

"Oh. Was that tough?"

"I guess, but I was getting tired of the all-girl thing.  Mom was always overly religious, and then, when she met this guy . . ."

"Did you meet him?"

"No.  She communicated with him by letters.  I guess she met him on the internet or something.  Not sure exactly.  Just one day, she wanted to go off and be with him, and she left.  Then, we moved a little while later.  Lynnette couldn't handle the old apartment or the school tuition."

"It sounds hard.  Sorry about all this."

"It's okay.  Really.  I am starting to accept it.  Thing is, at first, we just went with it, because she used to write us and call.  Then, that stopped.  So both of us started to worry about her."

"You know, my father is a newspaper publisher . . ."

"He is?"  she started, "I thought . . ."

"You thought he was a criminal?"

"i'm sorry, Jack.  I shouldn't listen to them.  I should make my own decisions."

"Probably, but I can understand.  He's a publisher and an investigative reporter, now.  Maybe he can help."

"Maybe."  She let it drop.  He finished his apple.

In a few minutes, they pulled up in front of her apartment building.  He noticed it was not far from the penthouse.  They got off the bus, and went into the lobby of the building.  It was shabby in some areas, and nice in others; he could see how it was a decent place at one time and had slowly lost its appeal over the years.  They went into an elevator that smelled of cleaning solution and cigars.  She said, "It's not the nicest place on earth, but it works."

"That's all that counts."

They exited the elevator and walked down a long, thin hallway.  She knocked on door twenty-seven.  It opened and an older version of Jenna with lighter hair was standing there.  She also had green eyes.  She said, "Hi, you must be Jack."

"Hi," Jack said.

***

"I'll go get him in about an hour or so, at least that is what he asked for," Todd said.

"Where did you get a car?"  Blair asked.

"I rented one, what else?  He wanted to be like 'normal' kids."

"How can anyone be normal in this family?"  She said, holding Ray and his favorite rattle.  She looked at the baby.  "Huh?  How can anyone be normal around here?"

He said, "The question is, do we want to be?"

"Good question."

"I hope he had a good time."

"Probably."

"He's concerned about her.  Her mother vanished.  He's trying to get her to talk, so he can help."

"Maybe that's what has been bothering him?  Well, that and the Morasco thing."

"I think so.  He's also worried about me.  The kid doesn't get a break."

"Let's just keep loving him, that's all we can do."

***

Jack and Jenna went onto the small balcony outside the apartment.  Looking over Llanview Center, he said, "I used to live there."  He pointed to the penthouse building, where Timothy now lived.  

She said, "You did?"

"Yeah.  I did.  For a while when I was a baby, and even recently for a bit."

"That's a nice building."

"Your art is amazing.  I can see why the teachers want you to show it."

"Thank you.  I've been drawing and painting since I was a little girl."

"It worked.  All that practice, I mean."

"Thanks.  I am glad you came over, Lynette really likes you.   I can tell she does."

"That's good, right?"

"Yes."

"Can you tell me more about your mom?  I mean, if you do, I know my father will help us."

She became very quiet.  "Is it true, Jack?"

"What?"

"Is your father, an ex-con?"

He swallowed.  "Yeah, but it was a long time ago.  He's paid for his mistakes."

"I wasn't questioning that.  I just wanted to know if they made it up, or . . ."

"No, it's not made up.  If I could tell you how much he's suffered over it, and in other ways, you would understand better.  It's just too much and too long of a story."

She nodded.  Then she said, "Maybe sometime."

He said, "Maybe.  He texted me, he's on his way.  Do you want to meet him?  I'd understand if . . ."

"Of course."

"Okay."  There was an uneasy silence between them.  He said, "It will take about an hour for him to get here.  We live on Llantano Mountain."

"About my mother, Jack.  When she ran off with that man.  Not sure what it was about, really.  She was living close to here, or we thought. Then, we lost touch.  Of course, I've already said we're scared what happened to her."

"I would be, too.  Do you know the guy's name?"

"No.  Just that she fell for him really hard.  Enough to leave us."

He didn't know what to say.  He assumed people left . . . for a lot of reasons.  He never even understood  the whole story of why his father left when he did, or what was behind it.  And what about his grandmother, leaving his father with Peter Manning as a child?  "People leave, sometimes."

"I know.  It hurts," she said, and lowered her head.  

He gently moved her hair aside, and lifted her face by her chin.  "It will be okay.  We'll help.  Maybe we can find her."

"All I have," she said, taking something out of her bag, "are her old letters.  Maybe they would be a clue or something?"  She handed the letters to him.

"You don't have to give them to me . . ."

"I know, but . . . I trust you.  And if you say your father can help, then, I trust in that."

The rest of the time, they sat in the sun, sharing the Ipod earphones and talking about music, artists and concerts they'd seen.  Her hair was brilliant in the sunlight, and at times, he felt himself losing track of the songs and almost hearing nothing but her voice.

When he got the text that Todd had arrived, he stood, "Well, my Dad is here, if you want to meet him.  He's out front."

They exited the apartment, after Jack saying his goodbyes to Lynnette, and went out front.  Todd was parked at the curb, in a car Jack didn't recognize, but he was relieved.  It was just a regular car.  Nothing fancy, rich or extravagant.  Todd was leaning against the it, his arms folded.  He said, "Hey, Buddy."

"Hey, Dad."  Jack said, stopping.  "This is Jenna."

"The artist.  Nice to meet you, Jenna," he said, holding his hand out to her.

"Mr. Manning.  Jack's said a lot about you."

"Well, that's good.  Glad you have had time to talk and get to know each other better,"  Todd said.  "I heard about an art show, something at school?"

"The teachers just want to show my art.  They think I should.  It's not something I can afford right now, but it was great to be asked.  I enjoy creating things."

"That's great, to have a hobby," he said, smiling.

She smiled in return.  Then, more pensive, she said, "I've given Jack some letters, of my mother's.  He said that you might be able to help me."

Todd was surprised that the girl had taken him up on it.  "Sure.  I'll do whatever I can."

"Well, it was nice to meet you, Mr. Manning.  Thank you for letting Jack come over and visit."

"You're welcome.  You ready, Bud?"

"Yeah.  Bye Jenna, see you in school Monday.  Or, I'll talk to you online or something."

"All right, bye Jack."

They loaded into the car, and Jack waved to her as they drove away.  He looked at Todd.  "Thanks, Dad, for renting the car, and stuff."

"No problem.  So cool that you want to impress a date without the limo.  A lot of kids would be showing that off."

"Nah, I thought it was better this way, at least at first."

"Not a bad idea, I guess."

"They don't have money.  You know."

"Yeah, it's a tough situation.  You could always tell her the truth about us and I can help out with the money for the art show."

"You'd do that?"

"She has talent.  Why not?"

Jack just looked at his father.  "I don't know.  She's just a kid, like me, I guess."

"She's got talent.  That's what counts.  She should have the chance.  Think it over.  I'd do it in a heartbeat."

"Will you still help me try and find her mom?"

"I said I would.  Sure."

"I have some letters."

"That's a good start."

"Dad, why would someone leave their family . . . for a man?"

Todd swallowed.  His mother hadn't left for a man, not exactly, but possible because of one.  "Maybe they want something else.  Something they are searching for.  Or something they want to get away from."

Jack sat, looking out the window.  He was quiet, with the music soft in one earbud.  The other hung over his chest.  "Like, when you disappeared nine years ago?  What was that about, Dad?  I mean, really?"

"It's not that important now.  I was just . . . being pigheaded.  I wanted revenge, I was going after a dangerous man.  I was . . . lost.  Your mother had thrown me out, because of my actions.  That's the size of it."

"What did you do?" he said, looking at Todd, who was intent on driving. 

"I fucked up.  To put it lightly."

Jack turned back to the window and remained quiet the rest of the way.  

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The Devil You Know: Chapter 27

When they got back to the hotel, Todd muttered something and headed for the bar.  Blair was ready to follow, but Starr stopped her.  “Let me try, please?” she pleaded.  Her mother had been taking on a lot with her father for the past few months and she felt she needed a break.  After a minute, Blair nodded and took Sam’s hand, leading him to the elevator. 

Starr nodded for Jack to follow, but her brother shook his head.  “You’ll need help.  You know how he can get.”

Silently thankful for her brother’s assistance, they headed into the lounge.  Todd was there, throwing back a shot.  Starr looked at him and let out a sigh, asking him cautiously, “Are you okay Dad?”

Todd looked at his little girl, all grown up now.  Even though he had just sat down, he already looked haggard.  “Yeah, I’m doing fine,” he answered, but it was a lie and he knew that Starr knew it was one too.

“You’ve been through a lot today.  But Harry seemed nice.  You could tell he loved your mother,” Jack piped in.  “It was kind of weird, seeing all those baby pictures of you.  Maybe we should have asked for a few, you know, for Aunt Viki.  She would have loved one for Llanfair.”

“Maybe if you have dinner with him again before we leave, you could ask him for some of them.  I’m sure your mother would have wanted you to have them eventually,” Starr added. 

Todd put his glass down and shifted his eyes between his kids.  “Look, I know you’re trying to make this better, but really, I just kinda need to be alone,” he told them.

“Not happening,” Starr said with an edge of defiance in her voice.  “Dad, you need to talk to someone, and in all honesty, Mom needs a break from this.  So you’re going to talk to us.”  She took his glass off the bar and headed to a table.  She set it down and stared at him, hands on her hips. 

A perverse sort of laughter bubbled out of Todd.  When he went over and sat down, Starr’s look turned confused, so he explained, “That the best impression of your Aunt Viki I’ve ever seen.”  He took another sip as the sodas the kids ordered came over.  “Starr, I’ve never been good a sharing my feelings, you know that.”

“Yeah, I do.  You just bottle them up, get suspicious and explode all over the place.  Why don’t you try it this way for as change?” she asked.

He nodded and looked at Jack.  “You remember the day at the tuxedo shop when you asked why Bitsy didn’t keep trying to get me?”  Jack nodded.  “Well, it got me wondering why she gave up on me.  And even today, with Harry saying he did try, it…doesn’t put me at ease.  I was still stuck with Peter.”  He gave a knowing look to Jack.  “And that screwed me up so much.”

“Dad, you not Peter,” Starr consoled him.  Knowing where his mind would go next, she added, “And you are not Victor.  You are a great dad, so please, stop thinking that way.”

Todd tried to smile, to put her calm her.  “I know,” he said very quietly.  “Look, I just need time to myself.  I promise I won’t do anything stupid.  Just, give me a hour, okay?”

Jack looked to Starr and gave her an imploring gaze.  Starr relented finally but told him “If you don’t get back upstairs in an hour, we are going to come looking fro you.”

“Thank you.  I…I’ll see you in an hour.”  With that assurance, his children left.

Upstairs, Blair had settled Sam down and went into the bedroom to call Harry Redding.  When the line picked up, Blair said, “Hello again.”

“Hello Blair,” he replied.  “I want to thank you again.  Your visit today was so wonderful.  I’m saddened Barbara wasn’t here.  She would have been just bursting with pride at seeing Todd and his family.”

“It was wonderful of you to have us over.  And I want to assure you, we will be meeting you for dinner tomorrow night.  I’ll call you with the details after I talk to Todd,” Blair informed him.  “I do have a request of you though.”

“Anything I can do, I will absolutely.”

“When you meet with us, can you bring some of the pictures of Todd?  I would like some for our home and I know his sister Viki would like some as well,” she asked.  “Just one thing, though.  None with Peter Manning, please.”

“Of course.  Todd should have them.  And I’ll put the ones with Peter away,” Harry said.  Then he paused before continuing.  “How bad was Peter?”

Blair didn’t answer immediately.  The truth was, she wasn’t even sure.  “He was physically abusive, beatings and he would burn Todd with a lighter.  I know there was verbal abuse.  Beyond that…”  Her voice traveled off, breaking a bit.  “Todd has never really confirmed the full extent of it.  And I never pushed him for the answers.”

“Well, despite that, Todd seems like he’s a good father.  And you seem to love him very much,” Harry said. 

“He is and I do so much.  I’ll call tomorrow about dinner.  Thank you again Harry.”  With that, she ended the call.

Walking back into the main room of the suite, she found Starr and Jack returning.  She looked around for Todd, but saw that he wasn’t there.  “Where’s your father?” she asked, growing concerned.

“He wanted some time alone at the bar,” Jack informed his mother.  “I think today wiped him out a bit.”

Blair headed towards to door, when Starr called out, “Mom, he wants to be alone.”

Blair looked at her first-born.  “Do you think it’s a good idea that he should be alone right now, in a bar?”  When Starr shook her head silently, Blair went on.  “I’ve dealt with your daddy in one of these moods.  He needs me right now.”  With that said, she left. 

When she got down to the bar, she saw Todd sitting at the table the kids had left him at.  He was staring at a glass with just ice in it, and swirling the cubes around.  “Hey there.  Is anyone sitting here?” she asked him.

He looked up at her but merely waved her into the seat.  For a few minutes they sat there in silence.  Finally, Todd said, “I wonder what my life would have been like if Bitsy had managed to get me away from Peter.”  When Blair didn’t answer, he looked at her.  “Really, think about it.  If she and Harry had managed to win custody of me all those years ago, what would that Todd Manning have been like?”

“Well, they would probably have been more honest with you earlier on.  About being adopted, about your biological father.  Bitsy’s letters mentioned the inheritance, mentioned something about that right?  And you would have probably grown up more secure in the notions of love and honesty,”  Blair said.  “Then again, if that had happened, I doubt we would have met.”

“You think so?” he asked, the question coming out in a curious tone.

“Well, if that was the Todd Manning who had been in Llanview, you would have probably smelled gold-digger on me right away.  That means we would never have had our courtship, such as it was,” she replied, a smile playing on her lips.

“Right, where you told me you were pregnant so you could cash in on my inheritance with me,” he replied, a hint of teasing in his voice.  It was an old game they played, but one he had grown fond of over the years. 

She caught his tone.  “Yes, Todd, but we made it work.  Three kids, a media empire.  Our love.  Despite all the obstacles that have been thrown in our way, mostly by ourselves, I wouldn’t trade them in for anything.”

Todd too her hand and kissed her fingers.  As he was doing that, his eyes caught sight of a piano in the corner of the lounge.  Ever since he saw the piano at Harry’s earlier, he felt himself drawn to the instrument.  He got up and went over, sitting on the bench. 

Blair followed and sat next to him.  “I called Harry to thank him again and I told him we would meet him for dinner tomorrow night.”  By the time Blair was telling him this though, he had started fiddling with the keys.  No discernable song was forthcoming,  but she could tell he was concentrating, as if trying to remember something.  At last, a very familiar tune began sounding out.  Blair gasped, remembering it and remembering a particular night she heard it.                

He had played two verses when he suddenly stopped and came out of the trance-like state he’d been in while playing.  He blinked twice and turned to her.  “Was I just…?”

“You were play ‘Unforgettable’ and doing a pretty damn good job of it,” she said, running her fingers through his hair.  “I never knew you would know that song.”

“I didn’t.  I’m mean, even that night at Rodi’s, we both had the same opinion of that song.  But somehow, just now, I knew it,” he told her.  “How did I know it?”

“Well, Harry said your mother used to say you were her best student.  Maybe something’s triggered in you and you’re remembering parts of your childhood that you suppressed.  Kind of like Viki with what Victor did with her,” Blair reasoned. 

“Great, so I’m cracking up?  Remember, I’ve been down this route before, faking all the way,” Todd asked, panic in his voice. 

“Todd, you also suffer from PTSD.  You’ve been under a lot of strain for a year almost.  This may be a symptom, or it may be release,” she explained, trying to calm him.  He had his back to her, so she turned him back towards her.  “Todd, Peter did a lot of damage to you,” she took a breath, seeming to come to a decision.  She led him  back to the table in the lounge.  “When I had Spinelli do the check on you he found the article about the recital, but he also found a police report from the same night.  Peter…Peter beat your mother so severely that she had to be hospitalized.  And you, you ran away and were found a while later by Harry Redding.” Tear sprang from her eyes. 

“So what are saying?” he asked.

“I’m no expert, but maybe you suppressed a lot of your memories from that night.  At the wedding I asked Victor if he remembered the incident, but he didn’t  If he didn’t then they may not have been given up during the brainwashing by you.”  She wasn’t really sure what she was saying, but to her mind, it sounded plausible.  “Todd, I think when we get back to Port Charles, you need to talk to someone, an expert.”

“No, Blair, not happening!” he shouted.  “I don’t do shrinks.”  Then he turned back to the piano.  In a quiet voice that belied the roar that had just leapt from his throat, he asked nodding his head, “Was I good?”

Blair smiled at him and hugged him from behind.  “It was very good.”

“Maybe we should perform at the Nurses’ Ball.  What d you think?” 

Blair knew what he was doing, changing the subject.  But she allowed him, deciding to go along with him.  “I would love to do that.”

“Fine then.  When we get home, we’ll let Lucy know.  But I want to keep it a surprise.  We’ll spring it on everyone.  I know my sister will get a kick out of it.”  Then Todd looked at his watch.  “Let’s grab the kids and get some dinner.  With that, he strode off, not noticing she wasn’t following.

Blair watched him walk away.  She loved him so much, but a familiar sensation was gripping her.  It was one she hadn’t felt since he had left for Ireland.  She was becoming afraid for his life, maybe not in the physical sense, but in other ways, that could take him from her as swiftly as a car over a cliff nearly had, years ago.


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Todd's Christmas Story

            He sat on the bed watching the fire on the TV screen.  This motel was only one step up from the Quick Stop.  He pulled out what was left of his funds.  “You’re right back where you started, Manning.  No rapes hanging over you, but you’re still a pariah in town.”

             He took out the picture he had stored in his wallet. He had swiped it from Blair’s photo album before leaving Llanview.  He looked wistfully at the picture: Jack, himself, Starr, Blair and little Sam.  Hope was the only one not in the picture that Christmas. His eyes blurred with tears, as he realized his darling granddaughter would never see another Christmas.  Starr would never forgive him for lying to her about Johnny’s part in Hope’s and Cole’s deaths.

             “I hate you.  How  could you keep the truth from me.  You said you loved me but what you did was cruel.  I hope they lock you up and throw away the key.”

              He reached up and traced her image.  As always, he had been attempting to keep himself out of prison and Starr had ended up the one hurt the most by his actions.  Blair was right, no matter how hard he tried to change, he never would.  “You let yourself be pulled into the fantasy.  Fairy tales are for children.  You’ll never get a happy ending, Manning.”  He got off the bed and poured himself a scotch.  He looked down at his foot, seeing the familiar anklet.  This time he was wearing it because John McBain and Anna Devane wanted to make sure he didn’t skip town.  He had been allowed bail but they had insisted on the monitor, John had informed the judge of his little escapade in March and he had agreed Todd was a flight risk.  Little did the judge realize Todd didn’t have enough money to get out of town.  Tea and Clint had managed to get an order to freeze all his assets and the money he had received from Jerry Jacks was now residing with the bail bondsman and Diane, his lawyer.  Like all those years before, Todd found himself hated again and this time he didn’t even have one friend.

          Todd got off the bed, grabbed his coat and headed out.  Before he knew it he was standing outside the Floating Rib.  The place was decorated for Christmas and he found himself surrounded by an assortment of lonely miserable people.  He was in his element: a pariah among the leftovers that nobody wanted anything to do with.  Todd was finishing his second drink when the song “I’ll Be Home for Christmas” began playing.  It was too much, and Todd quickly tossed Coleman enough money for a whole bottle and headed out of the bar.

         Tucking the bottle into his coat pocket he began walking back toward the motel.  He slipped his gloves on and turned his collar up around his face as snow began to fall across the city.  Not quite ready to return to his dismal room, he wandered down to the Landing for Spoon Island.  Across the lake he could make out the mansion.   It didn’t look quite so ominous with a covering of snow on it.   He brushed off the bench and sat down.  It was true he was all alone again, but there was one good thing.  He wasn’t locked in a sterile room  or a jail cell.  He was free to sit and watch the snow fall.

        Todd’s thoughts went back to another snowy evening.  It had been right after his father died.  He had gone to Rodi’s for a drink and the next thing he knew Blair was dragging him out into the cold to go sledding.  He could still picture them sliding down cemetery hill on one of Jonsie’s bar trays.  Blair’s arms had been tucked around his waist until she screamed and deliberately dumped them.  They had stumbled the rest of the way down the hill laughing.  He had needed that probably more than Blair even realized.  It had been just a guy and a girl, having fun.  Normal old fashioned fun and Blair had made it happen.

           Todd was brought out of his reverie by the sound of someone crying.  He got up and tracked the sound, finding a small child huddling behind some crates on the dock. “Hey, what are you doing here all by yourself.”

            The child looked up at him with big hazel eyes.  She couldn’t have been much older than four. She was shivering and only wearing a cotton shift and what looked like slipper socks.  Her little arms were wrapped close to her body and she was trying to get warm.  “My mommy had to go get something and she told me to stay here.”

             Todd could see her socks were already soaked through and he knew it was only a matter of time before she froze, as the temperatures were dropping.  “How long has she been gone?”

             “I.. I...don’t ..know.  I’m... so cold...” the child ’s teeth were chattering so hard she could hardly talk.

             Todd took off his coat.  He heard the clink of the glass from the bottle in the pocket and withdrew it, setting it on the crate.  Then he pulled the child up into his arms and wrapped her in the coat.  He sat back down on the bench with her trying to get her warm.  He was afraid to take her off the dock in case her mother was to come back.  After about twenty minutes, he looked down at the child. “You’re a fool, Manning, the mother obviously just left her.”  There was only one thing to do.  He stood up and began his walk.  The child still was shivering and Todd bundled his coat around her some more and picked up his pace.  He reached the street level and knew it was too long a walk to General Hospital.  “You’ll just have to flag a cab.  Looks like it’s going to be hot dogs and beans for a while.”   He signaled a cab and climbed in with the child.  “General Hospital and make it snappy.”   He welcomed the warmth of the cab and cradled the child against him as he reached for some more of his dwindling funds.  The cab pulled into the emergency bay, Todd paid and then carried the child into the ER.  He spotted Epiphany.

             Epiphany looked up and saw Todd Manning standing in front of her.  He was in his shirt sleeves and it was plastered to his chest and shoulders, wet from the snow.   In his arms was a small child wrapped up in his coat.

           “Can you help me?  I found this child and I’m afraid she might be getting ill.  She hasn’t stopped shivering since I picked her up on the dock.  She said her mother left her there sometime today.  I don’t know how long she was there before I found her.”

             Epiphany led him to a cubicle.  “You stay with her while I go get a doctor.”

             Todd tried to lay the child on the bed but she reached up and wrapped her little arms around his neck and began crying.    “Don’t go, I... I’m scared.”

           “Shh, a big girl like you.  You don’t need to be scared.  It’s bright and warm here and they’re going to take good care of you.  Now come on, sit down on the bed and I’ll stay here until they come back.”  She loosened her grip and let him place her on the bed.  He grabbed a warm blanket and wrapped it around her instead of his coat.  Sitting down next to her, he drew her close and began to tell her the tale of Beauty and the Beast.   She continued to shiver in his arms and her little arms had again wrapped around him as he told his story.  His eyes misted over.  The poor kid was all alone and he knew how that felt.  He gently kissed the top of her head and continued his story.

           The curtain opened and Dr. Webber and Epiphany were greeted with the sight of Todd Manning with a little girl nestled in his arms.  After everything he had put Sam Morgan through, it seemed strange to see him being so protective of a small child.

          Todd once again tried to separate himself from the child but she stubbornly held on.  He whispered into her little ear. “Hey shorty, these people are going to get you all warm and make you feel better.  It’s alright to let go, you’re safe now.”  She looked him straight in the eyes and gave a tremulous smile. Before he even realized what happened, he felt a little kiss touch his cheek and then she let go.  For the briefest moment, Todd didn’t want to let her go.  It was like saying goodbye to Hope all over again.  As Epiphany moved in to take charge. Todd turned back and gave the little girl a thumbs up and a smile.  “It’s going to be okay.”   Slipping his coat back on, he tucked his hands in his front pockets and exited the ER.

         It didn’t take him long to realize how uncomfortable his wet shirt was.  He looked outside the lobby door and saw that the snow hadn’t let up.  He was going to have to do something if he didn’t want to get pneumonia.  Remembering how Carly had gotten him scrubs, to get into see Starr after the accident, he made his way down to the Hospital locker room.   It should be simple enough to borrow a shirt, Manning.

         Upon entering the locker room something caught his eye.  It was a Santa Costume much like the one he wore the previous Christmas for Sam.  An idea took root in his head.  “Why not, no one will know it’s you?”

          A short time later, he stepped out of the locker room and headed for the children’s wing. He spent the next couple of hours going in and out of rooms greeting the children and telling his outrageous stories.  His spirit lifted as he made the rounds and soon the whole wing was filled with laughter.  He was about to get on the elevator when someone snagged his hand.  He looked around and Molly Lansing had it.  She was dressed like an elf.

          “Santa, we’ve been looking everywhere for you.  It’s time to go to the sun room.  Have you forgotten? You have to tell the Christmas story.”

           Todd was trapped, he had no other choice but to go along and continue playing Santa a little while longer.  He let Molly lead him to the chair and watched as the children, he had just spent time with, gather at his feet.

           Todd told the story as he remembered.  In his mind, he pictured CJ and Sara as they played it out that Christmas Eve so long ago.  The children listened with rapt attention and when he was finished, Molly brought him out a huge bag with gifts in it.  He began to dispense the gifts and realized he was under the scrutiny of several more people.  Dr. Webber and Nurse Epiphany, as well as John McBain, were all watching him carefully.

          Todd stood there, the near-empty bag in his hand, as the children dispersed.  He started to reach for the last package as John came up to him.

         “What is all this, Manning?”

          “What’s it look like, John?   I brought in a little girl because I was worried she was sick.  Is that a crime?  Oh, you’re all upset because I dressed as Santa.  My clothes were soaked from the snow and the costume was available.  Sue me.  I haven’t done anything wrong except visit with some sick kids and cheered them up.  Now if you’ll excuse me there’s one gift left in here and I intend to take it to the little girl I brought in.  No kid should be alone at Christmas.”

           Dr. Webber stepped forward.  “That isn’t going to be possible.”

           Todd looked at the three standing in front of him.  “Why not?  Oh, I get it, big bad Todd Manning can’t be allowed near a child like that.  Is that it?”

           Epiphany spoke up.  “You can’t take it to her because she’s gone.”

          “What do you mean she’s gone?  What kind of hospital are you guys running?  Wait a minute, that’s why you’re here, John.  You thought I took her?”

          “Todd, relax, I’m just here because your monitor was giving off strange signals.  I wasn’t even aware of the child.”

          Todd only heard part of John’s explanation.  All his thoughts were on the small child.  He turned back to Epiphany.  “I don’t understand, surely someone saw a young girl wandering around.  How could she just be gone?”

         “That’s the strangest thing, Mr. Manning.  We had gotten her out of the wet clothes and I went to get her some warm cocoa.   When I got back, she was just gone.  The bed was all made up like she had never been there.  If Dr. Webber hadn’t examined her, I would have thought I was losing it.  I’m sorry, we were looking for her when we found you with the children.”

           Todd didn’t know what to say.   He reached into the bag to pull out the last gift.  To his surprise, there was a name attached. The tag read. Merry Christmas Grandpa Todd.  He tore the package open and there in his hand lay Beauty and the Beast.  He heard a bright little laugh and felt the softest touch on his cheek.   “Merry Christmas, Hope,” he whispered softly back.

Port Charles Chronicles: Chapter 42

         Blair rolled over and realized Todd was no longer in the bed.  For a moment, her heart skipped a beat as she found herself remembering the previous morning: Todd lying so still on the MRI table. Where was he?  She heard his voice in the other room and began to breathe again.  You need to get a grip.  He’s alive and not going anywhere.  She sat up and grabbed her robe off the end of the bed and headed to find him.

****

          Lucy arrived at Crimson, intent on starting her new job with zeal, only to find the place empty.   No wonder the magazine is in the dumps.  No one works around here.  She was just settling down at the desk when the phone rang.  She picked it up.

          “This is Todd Manning.  I want you to get me a copy of the contract for the Crimson lease in the Metro Court hotel.”

          “Excuse me, but why on earth would I do that?  I don’t believe just anybody can call and get that kind of information about Crimson."

          “I can.  I’m the new owner of it and several other properties.  Who the hell are you?”

          “My name is Lucy Coe and I’m in charge of Crimson until Kate Howard can return.”

           “You don’t say, well, until further notice all publications of Crimson will cease.  I don’t care what arrangement you made with Ms. Howard.  Crimson is to be shut down.”

           “But you can’t just shut it down.” Lucy’s heart sank, she had been looking forward to working with a fashion magazine.

            “Ms. Whatever your name is, I just did.  Look.  Do you want a job?  I need an executive assistant, you can work for me.  The first thing I need you to do is get in touch with the Managing Editor of the Port Charles Press, now The Sun, and tell him to get a reporter over to the Courthouse, pronto.   I want someone covering the Kate Howard trial.  You tell him if he wants to keep his job he’ll do it no questions asked.  Do you get my drift?”

            Lucy squared her shoulders. “You have a lot of nerve.  I was hired to manage this magazine not to be somebody’s assistant.”

           Todd realized he had figuratively just stepped on some toes.  Blair had been after him for a long time to change some of his business practices.  He had always run roughshod over his employees.  He had just been given a new lease on life.  Maybe it was time for some changes.  With the new properties he had just acquired, he really was in need of an assistant.  Lou was no longer around.

          For the first time in a long time, Todd backed off.  “My apologies, Ms. Coe.  I assure you the position of my executive assistant is not just an ordinary secretarial job.  I’ve recently expanded my holdings, and my personal assistant would be in charge of keeping the number of high-level officers in my various companies, in line.  It would be your job to troubleshoot the minor problems of these companies, leaving me free to handle the more pressing ones.  It would also mean taking the reins temporarily of a company, should I decide a new head officer is needed.  I’m really in need of someone I can trust.  Would you be interested in such a job?”  Todd felt two arms circle his waist and looked over his shoulder at Blair.  He laid an arm over hers and interlaced their hands.

           Blair laid her head on his shoulder.  She was amazed by what she was hearing.  Todd was actually being reasonable and generous.  The last person he had trusted that much had been Lou.  And even with her, he had still held fast to the reins.  He was offering a virtual stranger the opportunity of a lifetime.  Back when Melador was just getting a foothold, she had met Lucy Coe, but she knew Todd had no idea whom he was talking to.  From what she knew of the woman, Lucy was a bit of a handful, but actually very intelligent and very savvy in terms of business.  She would probably be an excellent addition to Todd’s staff.

          Todd waited patiently, for an answer.  Having Blair’s arms around him always helped calm him.  “Well, Ms. Coe?”

           Lucy had been taken aback by the sudden change in the personality of the caller.  It was like talking to two different people.  “Excuse me.  Am I still talking to Todd Manning?”

           Todd chuckled. “Yes, so how about it?  Do you want to come on board as my assistant?  I can’t guarantee you will see this side of me that often.  Most people who work for me consider me something of a monster.  But if you’re willing, I can promise you’ll be well compensated for putting up with me.”

            Lucy looked around at the empty office.  According to the man on the phone, Crimson was dead in the water for now.  She really hated being out of work and had looked forward to getting back into the grind, mixing it up with the business world.  Why not Lucy? It’s a job, and if you work it right, you still might get to manage Crimson.  “Very well Mr. Manning, you’ve got yourself an executive assistant, but I will see that a contract specifying everything you just offered me is typed up, all that will be required will be our signatures.  Is that acceptable?”

         Todd smiled, it appeared Lucy Coe might be just what he was looking for.  “That will be fine.  Since you’re already here in the Metro Court, perhaps you will meet me here at my suite in say an hour and we’ll finalize the arrangement.”

         “Thank you, it would probably be helpful to recognize each other if we’re going to work together.  In the meantime, to show I trust you, Mr. Manning,  I’ll find that lease contract and bring it with me, and my next call will be to your new Managing Editor.  I believe Kate’s trial starts shortly.”  Lucy hung up and looked around the office.  Okay, if I were Kate, where would I keep the important papers.

          Todd set the phone down on the table next to him and turned in Blair’s arms until they were facing each other.  “Hi.  Hope I didn’t wake you.”

         “You didn’t, but I was worried for a moment.  I didn’t expect you to be up working this early.” Blair stood up on her tiptoes and kissed him.

           Todd lingered in the kiss, savoring it, then he reluctantly slipped free of her embrace.  There was a lot to be done and if he stayed with her much longer they would have ended up back in bed. “It’s not early it’s almost ten o’clock.  Would you like some coffee?  I can order some chocolate chip pancakes if you want?”

           Blair was disappointed that Todd pulled free, but answered his question. “I’m not hungry right now, but I will take some coffee.  So it sounds like you have a new Lou.  I must say I’m surprised.  How on earth did you find out about Lucy Coe?”

           “I didn’t, she answered the phone at Crimson.   You sound like you know something about her.  Have I just made a mistake?”

           “Relax, she’s a little flamboyant but overall a pretty smart lady.  What was she doing at Crimson?”

           “According to her, she was hired by Kate Howard to run the magazine for a while. “

           “Well, there you go.  Kate Howard wouldn’t let just anyone take over.  But if she’s running Crimson, how can she help you?”

           “I guess you didn’t hear that part of the conversation.  I’m shutting Crimson down until I can restructure it.  Kate’s in no shape to run the magazine and it is bleeding funds.  You better get dressed, Ms. Coe will be here in less than an hour.  I’d like your assessment of her.  Then when I’m  finished with her, we can head for the realtors' office.”

          Blair threw him a mock salute. “Yes Sir, Mr. Manning.” She took the coffee he held out to her, smiled, and made her way back into the bedroom.

         He watched her go, sauntering away from him, swaying her cute behind suggestively. Damn, why did I tell that woman to come here? As much as he was tempted to follow, Todd strengthened his resolve and picked up the room phone.

         “Front Desk.  How may I help you, Mr. Manning?” Olivia Falconeri frowned, she knew from talking to her son recently, that someone had tried to kill Todd Manning.  She had been told it was pretty serious by both her son and Carly, yet here he was back at the hotel.  “Are you feeling alright?  Mrs. Jacks told me to get you anything you might need.”

         Todd looked at the phone for a minute. Just how many people knew what had happened to him.  “I’m fine.  Carly told you to get me whatever I want. Right?”

         “Yes, Sir.”

         “Good, I need a notary public up in my suite in about half an hour.  Does the Hotel have one on staff?”

         “ No, Sir, but I know of one and can have him here in that time.”

         “Great.  By the way, I know how Carly might have information about me, may I ask if she told you or if you found out some other way?  I would be very unhappy if it’s all over the hotel.”

         “Mr. Manning, I assure you, only Carly and myself are privy to what happened.  My son Dante is the detective working on your case.  He’s already made me promise to keep it to myself.  I wouldn’t do anything to make your life harder.  You’re a guest of this hotel.”

         “Right.  Okay, send the notary up here as soon as possible and I’m expecting a guest.  A Ms. Coe, send her up too.”   Todd hung up, The light mood he had woken up with had just turned a little gray.  He had tucked the fact that someone wanted him dead, away in a part of his mind where he put things he’d rather not think about.   Now Olivia Falconeri had brought it back out into the light.  He could hear the shower running.  If he made it quick, perhaps he could get an update from Detective Falconeri and find out if they had made any progress identifying his assailant.  Do it.  Blair doesn’t need more to worry about.  Someone’s trying to kill you.  You have a right to know.  As he started to reach for his phone, he felt the pain begin.  The thought of the killer brought on the headache.  He pulled the aspirins out of his pocket and poured three of them into his hand.  He popped them into his mouth and poured a glass of water.

         “You’re a fool."

          He almost dropped the glass.  He turned slowly and saw her sitting, curled up on the couch.   “Give it up, Irene.  You had your chance.  I’m still here.”

         “You can’t escape your fate.  I‘ve got all the time in the world and sooner or later you’re coming to me.  She’s just a stopgap.  You’ll be mine, either by your own hand or an assassin’s,  it’s all the same outcome.”

           Todd heard Blair singing in the bathroom and closed his eyes concentrating on her voice and only her voice.  After a few minutes, he opened his eyes.  Irene was gone.  He walked to the liquor tray and poured a shot, downing it with one gulp.  Were the headaches the result of Irene or was Irene the result of the headaches?  It didn’t really matter.  He had to find a way to rid himself of her once and for all.   He looked up Dr. Collin’s phone number but before he could call, there was a knock on the door.  Setting up a session would have to wait.  He walked to the door and opened it.  Blair was right.  Ms. Coe was definitely not what he used to in an assistant.  He had an idea that his corporate officers would be falling over themselves for this one.  “You would be Ms. Coe, I gather.”  He stood back and watched as she made her way into the suite. Dressed in vibrant blue, she commanded attention.  Oh yeah.  This one is going to be fun.

           Lucy swept into the room. “ You would be right. Mr. Manning.” While he had been sizing her up, she had been doing the same.  She had taken an extra few minutes to read up on her infamous and soon-to-be new boss.  She knew about his criminal record both past and current, and knew like others in his tax bracket, he was also a shrewd businessman.  Although she had seen a picture, it didn’t do the man justice.  There was something feral and magnetic about him.  She ventured to guess it would be a good thing to stay on his good side. Lucy turned around and faced him.  “As you requested, here is the lease contract for the Crimson offices.  If you don’t mind me asking, what did you want it for?” She pulled the contract out of her purse along with a second set of papers.

            Todd held out his hand and she gave him the contract.  “That set of offices is the best location in the city, and as of next week, it will be the new home of the corporate headquarters of Manning Enterprises.”


*** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** ***
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Diamond in the Rough: Chapter 12

"How good of all of you to choose to be with us," Father MacNamara said.  Three nuns in impeccable habits stood, waiting.


"We're glad to be here, Father" one of the three said, graciously accepting his hand and shaking it.  They all proceeded into the lobby of St. Anne's, each with a simple black suitcase and nothing more.


He said, "I am sure that our patients will benefit from your experience and expertise.  We are grateful all of you have decided to become members of the staff here at St. Anne's.  We've had an influx of guests over the last week, when the Melbourn Institution closed."


"Thank you, I am certain I'll fit in just fine here.  I've met a lot of the other nuns, they're very nice.  And it's a beautiful setting," the tallest one said.


"Yes.  We certainly pride ourselves on keeping the place attractive and pleasant for the residents."  Father responded.


"It shows, Father.  It's quite lovely here," another said.  "I'm Sister Elizabeth Mary, this is Sister Francis Joseph and Sister Ambrosine."


"Please, make yourselves at home.  I expect Sister Rebecca Katherine to come soon.  She'll be the one showing you to your quarters."


Behind them, lingering by the door, was a fourth.  As the first three clergywomen went into the family room area to wait for Sister Rebecca Katherine, Father MacNamara approached the latecomer.  He said, "I'm sorry, I didn't realize there was another of you coming."


"Well, no one was, I was sent from the Mother House, knowing that you need so much help, Father.  I'm glad to meet you," she put out her hand.


"How will we address you, Sister?"  He said, shaking it.


"Sister Martina Agnes.  I'm so pleased to be here," she said, and smiled warmly to the priest.


***

Dorian walked into the kitchen.  She was fluttering around like a butterfly, and both Kelly and Cassie watched her every move.  


She went into the refrigerator, pulled out a yogurt, swung it to the counter to open it, opened the drawer with a flourish and then got a spoon.  Practically spinning, she sat herself at the table opposite the two of them.


Kelly said, "You'd better stop dancing with that yogurt before it ends up all over all of us."


Dorian ate some, and said, "Well then I'll just sit here and be quiet."


"Mother, you know you want to tell us."  Cassie said.


"Tell you what, Cassie dear?"


"About the date!"  Kelly slammed the table.  All of the liquid in the various cups and glasses splashed a bit.  


"Oh, that," Dorian said.  She continued to eat her breakfast.


"Come on, Dorian, spill!"  Kelly chided.


"There was a date."  Dorian said.


"We know that," the two younger women said, practically in unison.


"It was . . . nice."


"Mother, we give up, already," Cassie said, leaning forward on her elbows.  "Come on."


"It was a lovely time.  He's a charmer.  He's interesting.  He's colorful.  He has an intriguing past.  He's debonair, sophisticated, entertaining.  He's a gentleman."


"This sounds great..."  Kelly said.


"Just the last one, the gentleman part,"  Dorian said.


"Okay, fill us in, what does that mean?"  Cassie said.


"He was a perfect gentleman, and in this case, I was actually hoping he wouldn't be."


"Mother!"  Cassie said.


Kelly said, "Oh never mind, Cassie, tell us more, Aunt Dorian."


"We went to dinner at The Country Club.  He took me dancing at Capricorn."


"Dancing at Capricorn?" Cassie said, laughing.


"Yes, and we danced for hours.  And talked.  He's quite entertaining, and I dare say a bit romantic."


"Opening doors, and such?"  Cassie said.


"Yes, but . . . something more intoxicating than that."


"Whoa!"  Kelly said.  "Intoxicating.  That's a lot for a first date.  Any lip action?"


Cassie said, "Kelly!"


Dorian puckered her lips in response.  "I don't kiss and tell girls.  But, I think Mr. Broderick has made me see things differently around this town."  Dorian said, "He's  . . . Let's say he peaked my interest in staying around here a bit longer."


***

Jack came into the house, and put his bookbag on the table by the door.  "Dad?  Dad, you here?"

Blair came down the staircase with Ray in her arms, "See, your brother's home.  See?"  The toddler put his arms out to Jack, and Jack took him and flung him up a bit in the air.  Blair said, "Careful, he just ate."

Jack stopped, and putting Ray in his arm, walked toward the family room.  "Is Dad home, Mom?"

A twinge of jealousy went through her, but her happiness that Jack wanted his father won out.  "No, not yet.  Any time now, I think.  He wanted to go to The Sun for a while.  Said he had a few problems to work out."

"Would it be okay if Williams brought me there?  I really want to talk to him about something."

The door closed behind them, "If you're talking about me, too late."  He went to Blair first, and kissed her, sweeping her into his arms effortlessly, and Jack did his usual look-and-flush-red.

He went toward Jack and scooped up Ray.  "Hey you," he said, holding the baby close to his chest, over his shoulder.  Ray was getting older; he didn't rest there as easily, and sometimes he squirmed so much Todd would have to change it.  He said aloud, "I miss when you were my little sack of flour, Little Guy."

Blair, misty-eyed, said, "Me, too.  They grow fast."

He looked at Jack, "So, did you want to talk to me about something?"

"Yeah, I . . . kinda do."

"I'll go take Ray upstairs.  It's almost nap time," Blair offered.  She knew her son wanted to talk to Todd alone.  It was probably man business.

"So, what's up, Son?"  Todd said, making his way into the family room.  He began to build a fire without much thought.

"It's about Jenna.  Something . . . well, something happened."

"I think we should have had this talk before now, then.  It's kind of rushed, and you should have access to protection . . ."

"No, Dad, not that!  I just met her.  It's something else."

Todd was secretly relieved.  He wasn't quite ready for his first born son to take on that personae.  He wasn't sure when he would be, but he knew, it would be sooner than later.  "Like?"

"She cried at lunch, and I finally got it out of her.  Her mother is missing."

"Missing?"

"Yeah.  Something about leaving the family for some guy, and then not coming back.  She said she used to write, and then it stopped."

"Where is she from?"

"She won't say."

"Where is the mother from?"

"That either."

"Where was she last seen?"

"She gave me nothing, Dad.  I just . . . don't know how to handle it, because I want to help her."

Todd looked at his son and realized what was happening to him.  He was falling for the girl.  His son was falling in love.  He said, "I can't do much to help you unless I know more.  But, I think you're asking me how to handle her, right now, is that it?"

"Yeah."

"Just be there for her."  For some reason, he heard The Coach's voice.  "Just listen, and be there.  And, if you can get her to trust you, try and get more info.  Then maybe we can help."

"I thought of that.  You have all those resources and stuff.  Maybe you could even find her?"

"I can't promise, but it would be worth a try.  I'd need more info, though.  That's where you come in.  but I'll tell you, don't push.  She'll tell you when she's ready."

"Like you?"

"I guess.  Yeah, if you want to say that."

"Did you tell Mom, Dad?"

"A little, yeah.  I don't want you to worry about all that.  I've got it under control.  She knows there's something.  You need to forget it."

"How can I?  It's all I can think of, sometimes.  My grandfather was . . . he was a freak."

Todd sucked in his breath, and briefly closed his eyes.  When he opened them, he saw Jack, looking contrite.  He said, "Nothing to be sorry about.  You can say whatever you feel to me, you have that right.  You're my son.  And you're right.  He was a sick man."

"He wasn't your real father, though."

"No, he wasn't."

"Mom said your real father was not so great either."

He sighed.  "No, he wasn't."

"How did you get to be such a great Dad, then?"

How did you get to be such a great Dad, then.

Todd didn't know what to say exactly, he just pushed his emotion back and said, "It's easy.  A great set of kids, and that beautiful wife of mine.  Makes it simple."

"No, really.  How did you know how to be a good Dad?  You had a bunch of crap when you were a kid."

Dark paneling.  The door is little. . . He ran his fingers through his hair.  "I don't know."  He felt his head lightening.

"Dad, you okay?"

Todd didn't answer.

"Dad?  Dad!"  Jack called out, as Todd toppled over.  Jack went to the base of the stairs, and yelled for his mother.

Blair bounded down the stairs as quickly as possible.  "Oh my God, Jack, what happened?"

"He was just sitting here talking to me.  I . . . think it was my fault.  I asked him how he learned to be a good father, and then he just went blank.  God, Mom, is he all right?"

Her expression revealed to Jack that something was terribly wrong.  "Todd?  Todd!"  She called, gently slapping at his cheeks.  "Todd, come on, all right?  Don't zone out on us."

After a few minutes he opened his eyes.  "Hi, Blair."

"Hi.  Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm okay.  I just, I don't know, I just got dizzy a minute.  Must be the lack of food today.  I haven't eaten since breakfast."

"Yeah," she said, "Maybe that's it."  Worried, but not wanting to pursue what it really was about with Jack there, she helped him back up onto the couch and sent Jack to get a cool towel for his head.

He said, "Thanks, Jack.  That feels pretty good."

Blair said, "Jack, please go see to Ray."  After he left the room, she said, "Todd Manning, I've had just about enough.  What the hell is going on?"

***

Sister Rebecca Katherine saw Bea drawing a picture in the solarium, and walked slowly to where she was.  She said, "May I see it?"


Bea was hesitant, and covered her work with her hand at first.  Looking to Sister Rebecca Katherine's smiling face and soft eyes, she moved her hand slowly away.


The nun picked up the drawing and said, "My, that's a fine piece of art.  You're a bit of a diamond in the rough, eh, dear?"  She looked up, and smiled at the nun.  The drawing was of the Wall Speedwells that they had picked. 


Sister Rebecca Katherine sat at the table with her new friend, and watched her continue to draw.  "Would you like some colored pencils to add color to your pictures?"


The woman looked up and made the same, small nod she had made to the nun days back when they went to the garden.  The sister got the pencils, and returned back to the table and placed them down.  Bea had returned to a previous drawing, and opened the box and carefully selected a pencil, and worked diligently to continue her picture.  Sister Rebecca Katherine, meanwhile, had a small conversation with her, as she worked.  "I think you're very talented, dear.  This is a lovely picture.  But for the life of me, I can't quite figure it out."


Bea ignored her, diligently drawing, and adding, and choosing color after color to make it just right.  


The nun continued, "It's beginning to take shape, quite nicely.  It's a building or something like that, isn't it?"


Bea continued to draw, furiously, and the nun watched as the form took place.  "A kind of a palace or a castle.  You're quite good, dear?"  she hoped the woman would say something to her, or at least try. 


Within a few moments, Bea lifted her head, and her face was not all smiles.  She was blank, more toward fear than any emotion.  She slid the picture toward the nun.  There was a beautifully crafted drawing of a church, standing majestically, with very ornate details and tall spires.  In front of the church, were lovely shrubs with blossoming flowers in red and pink.  The path was cobblestone, and the day was portrayed as sunny and bright, with clouds and birds flying overhead.  As Sister Rebecca Katherine looked closer, one other detail became apparent; etched lightly and blended into the largest mass of clouds was the ominous face of a man.     


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