Todd Revisited: Waking (Chapter 3)

Thunder loomed from the outside, the rain hitting on the windows, streaking them with odd reflections. Sounds all around were blaring, noise from the party below; music, bass-heavy; cautious bubbling from a nearby fishtank; her screams; a voice, "Powell, lock the door."

He heard himself talk. "Powell. Do it."

His own gasp woke him as he sat straight up. As his eyes adjusted, he slowly remembered where he actually was. The Minuteman Motel was not quite the place he'd have chosen, but good old Agent Kent had chosen for him. Still, days later, he was feeling the sick. I-haven't-eaten feeling in the pit of his stomach when he thought about the scene at the pool when he'd taken a another life. When he'd taken another life? Why did he feel that was the right thing to say? Had he taken a life, aside from the one he destroyed? He knew he must have crushed this woman, this Marty. He must have corroded and deflated her, like an empty sack. But had he killed before? Searching his mind's files was almost impossible, aside from a searing dull pain in his left temple, it was like wading through mud. So, he made his time worth something by turning on Agent Kent's computer again and searching those files instead.

His son had taken a life. He knew this from listening in to his conversations with Starr by the pool just a day ago. His son was a murderer. It was an accident, but that didn't make it any less true. At least, he heard his son saying it was an accident, he heard his daughter believing it was an accident. He really had no proof either way that it was. Glancing back at the screen, he saw the fresh-faced woman called Gigi, who had lost her life in that very accident. Not sure what to do next, he forced his eyes shut and tried to remember who he could trust. And, the answer was there when he opened them. "The Banner" was the newspaper where Gigi's picture was, and next to it, were the words "Victoria Lord" and in his mind's eye, he heard himself say, "I have a sister, her name is Vicki. She is the one to be trusted above all."

Grabbing the gun off the desk, he made the decision to try and find her and to make her see him, and to watch the reaction she might have to his face, whatever that might be. It might be a clue as to why everyone else seemed to forget that very face. These were the things that confused him. Could he expect to come back after 8 years and have Blair sitting waiting for him? No. Could he expect her to be alone, single? No. Could he expect Tea to be in town, and even if she were, did he expect her to be single? No. But to see them fawning over this impostor, it was almost unbearable. Unthinkable.

"Twisted, even for me." He said aloud. But it explained, in a Twilight Zone way, why no one ever tried to find him, including his children. He wasn't missing anymore. He wasn't dead.

He wanted to talk to Vicki, to get help from her, or to be chastised by her, or to just see her faint at his face, or tell him to go away, whatever the outcome would be, he wanted it. And more, he needed it, or he felt he'd go mad within this isolated world he was living. He would have to find her, no matter what it took. If she was to be trusted, above all, then he would go to her first. So, with the gun poking in his ribs, he left the motel room, determined to track her down. For a second, he wondered why he'd grabbed the gun, then thought, "can't have anyone going around using my name, can we?"