Failings of the Fathers: 24

"Sam, this is Jewel," Blair said, holding the tiny baby in her pink blanket.  Sam's eyes widened, and his mouth opened.  

"Wow," he said, in a tone of astonishment.  "She's so little."

"She is little.  We need to be gentle with her."

Little Ray walked over to the bed, and peered up.  "Sam, up!  Want to see.  Want to see."

Todd stepped in.  "Ray, you have to be very gentle with the baby.  She's very small."  He lifted his youngest son up, kneeling him on the bed near Blair.  "See?"

Little Ray looked at Jewel quizzically, and said, "Doll?"

"No, she's a person, like you.  You were small once, too."  Blair said.  "You have to be very nice to the baby."

"Nice.  Nice to the baby.  Baby play?"

"Not yet.  But she will when she grows up more."

Ray clapped happily and laughed.

Sam said, "Can I hold her, Mom?"

She looked at Todd, and he seemed to say "why not" with his expression.  She was only four pounds.  Sam had carried more than that every day to school.  He said, "Have to always support her head with your hand or your arm."

"I can do it, I've seen lots of people hold babies before."  Sam said, taking Jewel into his arm with Todd's help.  "She's so light."  

Ray looked on, with an expression of amazement.  "I hold baby?"

"No honey, you're too little."

"Daddy, down," Ray said.  He had lost interest.

Sam was falling in love with his sister.  He studied her face and talked to her sweetly.  He looked up and said, "I love her, Mom.  She's so pretty."

"She is, isn't she?"  Blair agreed.  Jack was leaning in the door frame.  

"All right, hand her over, Puny.  I guess I have to try.  I just feel all big around her."

"Anyone is," Todd said, realizing that even Ray dwarfed his daughter.

"So, you think I'm still gonna be Puny now that she's around?"  Sam seemed almost sad to lose it.

"Of course, you're the one and only Puny and Runty there is.  She's a girl, she'll have pretty names like Gumdrop."

Blair looked at Todd.  "They're your sons," she joked, sarcastically.

Jack took the baby from Sam.  "Wow.  She's like a feather.  She's so . . . perfect."

Blair smiled, and Todd folded his arms over his chest, watching his sons dote on his daughter.  His family.  Nothing was going to take it apart.

***

"I've been meaning to talk to you," Tina said, standing right outside Aiden's room.  

Timothy approached, his hands in his pockets. "What of it, Dear?"

"Not here, too many ears."  She had a secret mission tone to her voice.  He rolled his eyes as she brought him into a supply closet.

"Dear Lady, you're not propositioning this old man?"

"No, stop!  I want to talk to you, and I'm sick of Larry, Mo and Curly always being around when I try."

"Well, go ahead then.  I want to see my son."

"Those friends of his.  Except for Miguel, who cracked up, supposedly, they are constantly around."

"So?"

"I don't know, I just get a creepy feeling."

"Martina, y'ar really going a bit daft here."

"No, no I'm not.  The other night, when we went to get a snack and they were there.  And then they sat so close that the tall old one hit me with his chair."

"This does not make for a conspiracy, Dear Girl."

"Maybe not.  But remember, Aiden is just not sick.  He was put here, by the Men of 21 and their actions, toward a little boy.  An innocent little boy, who was kept from you for years.  What is to stop the leftovers of them from coming to finish the job?  If he gets his memory back, they will be up for far more than Patrick Thornhart's kidnapping."

He stopped.  Was she right?  Could she be?  Was there any truth to it.  The possibilities. . .
She kept talking.  "What did Todd say?  They brainwashed a little six year old into forgetting? They shot his mother dead.  There are thoughts in there that they want erased.  You know first hand how dastardly they are.  You know."

He didn't respond, but somehow, he found an element of truth in her suspicions.  "Where are they from, then?"

"One is American, the big mean one.  One is English, and the other, he's either Portuguese or Spanish, but American as well."

"The one in the psych ward, eh?  This Miguel?"

"Yeah.  I suppose."

"We'll watch them."

"Then you believe I could be right?"

"I didn't say I believe it, no.  But is it possible?  Anything is, where these men are concerned.  Y'ar brother knows.  They are capable of anything."  His mind went to Todd's explanation about Greece and the reunion of Zeus and his adoptive mother.  They'd farmed them.  To be killers.  As children.  He remembered the dark under Todd's eyes from lack of sleep when he couldn't put down Cholas' journal.  He'd almost lost his mind during that time . . .

"Timothy?  Are you listening?"

"I'm sorry, Dear Tina, I was . . . thinking back.  Ya could be right, I won't rule it out.  We'll tell Todd, he'll pay for extra security for Aiden.  Does that work?"

"Yes, that works.  He'll totally get it, after everything he has been through."

"I don't know why I didn't think of it before.  They could regroup and send someone to end Aiden's life.  That's not a stretch at all, Dear Lady."

***

"Mom, can I keep her in my room?"  Jack said.  "I'll take care of her."

"Well, for a few hours, but then you have to share."

"Sure.  I'll take care of her.  Does she have a bottle?"

Blair looked down the same second Todd pointed to her chest.

Jack said, "I'll bring her back for feeding," and rolled his eyes as he left with Jewel, back in her basket.

Sam followed, "I wanna take care of her, too!"

"Me, too, me!"  Ray said, following.

Todd looked at Blair.  "Well, she's got three protectors.  All sizes."

Blair laughed.  "She does.  Todd, I'm so happy.  Are you?"

For once he did not have to think about it.  "Yeah.  Really happy."  He paused, and put his hand on her head, smoothing her hair. "No one is going to hurt them."

"I know."

"I won't let anyone hurt them."

"I know, Todd."  The room went very quiet.

The silence between them was screaming Peter.  "I'll find out.  If the bastard's alive."

"I know you'll do everything you can for your kids."

"I . . . think I should go to Chicago, Blair."

She didn't balk.  "All right, if that is what you think it will take."

"I . . . have to put this to rest.  If he's out there, wanting my kids, I . . ."

"Shhh," she said softly, "He's probably not, but it's better if we know.  Put it to rest, and then move on with our lives."

He sat down dejectedly, running his hands through his hair.  "You've been saying that since I got back.  It's never right for you, Blair."

"Stop that, all right," she whispered.  "Nothing with you is wrong for me.  Just find out, My Love, and we will do our version of normal, at last."

"Manning Monotony.  I like it."

"Me, too.  Go.  Go to Chicago, we'll be fine."

"Speaking of being fine, think Jack's okay with Jewel?"

"We'll give him three more minutes," she said.

He kissed her.  "I miss you, so much."

"I miss you, so much."

"We'll have to fix that, and soon." He got up from the bed.  

"Where you going?"

"Get the baby from those defenders of justice in there.  Who is going to get their hands on Jewel with them around?  Ray alone could run them to death."

He left and Bitsy poked her head in the door.  She had an expression that read, "Can I come in?"

"Come on in, Momma.  Good morning!"  Blair said.

She waved.  She sat by Blair and handed her a sheet of paper.  There was a drawing of Todd and Blair, right after Jewel's birth.  She said, "Oh, Momma, it's so beautiful."

She then noticed there were several sheets, not just one.  The second sheet had Bitsy's handwriting going down at least half the page.  She read it, aloud:

Blair, I love Todd so much.  I loved him as a baby, too, and I did wrong by him.  I never protected him right.  I should have let Peter kill me before touching him.  But that's in the past, and I can't change it.  

He says he forgives me.  I work on believing.

I just want to say that Peter is out there.  I don't know who else to tell.  I wanted to tell Todd Peter was dead, and I did.  When he had the bad dream, I told him to let go.  Then, I had my dream.  And more of them, almost every night.  Peter is alive.  He wants the babies.  He is evil and dark.  Blair, I don't know what to do other than to tell you.  When I try to tell Todd, he just says the same things.  He says he will kill Peter.  I can't let Todd go to jail and leave his family for what I should have done years ago.  

Please don't let Todd find Peter.  I know Peter is living, but I want him far away from the family.  He cannot be near the children. I have seen what he will do.  He is evil.  He will beat them and hurt them.  Todd will have to kill him to stop him.  He will hurt anyone.

She put the letter down, and turned to the last page.  It was a picture, drawn, of Peter in shadow, holding Todd, it seemed, up by the collar against the wall, with a small baseball bat in his other hand.  She swallowed.  "Momma, is this a dream?"

Bitsy shook her head "no."

"This happened?"

She nodded.

"Oh, I see."  Blair said, blinking back tears.  "Did this happen often?"

She nodded again, and made a motion with her hands as if it were constant.

"This is Todd?"

She nodded.  The little boy's face was shadowed in the picture, but Blair could make out the long hair around his shoulders.  His pajamas were Superman.  Suddenly, Blair got a wave of nausea throughout her body, and cast the papers down, getting up to head for the bathroom.  She splashed cold water on her face.  Bitsy came in after her and made an expression of sorrow.  Blair said, "No, it's all right, Momma.  You can talk to me.  Todd's going to get to the bottom of all of this.  I promise."

Bitsy became upset, and grabbed Blair's arm, shaking her head "no" again.

"Momma, it's okay.  Peter is dead, and if he's not, we will find out.  We'll press legal charges against him for everything he did.  Timothy will help us.  He won't get away with it, and he won't get near our children, that I can promise you."

She was frantic, trying to express herself and searching wildly for her pencil.

Blair took both her hands, "Momma, look at me, please."

Bitsy did, and her eyes were filled with terror and tears.  "Nothing will happen to the children. Peter is dead, and even if he is not, for some reason, he will pay, legally, for what he did.  Trust me, and trust Todd."

She waited a moment, and then nodded in agreement.

"All right, then.  Thank you for the beautiful drawing.  I am sorry you're having so many problems with your dreams."

She nodded, sadly, looking down.

"We'll take you to see Ray, would that help?"

She shook her head "no."

"Why, Momma?"  Blair said, pointing to the pencil that had slipped out of her pocket onto the floor.  She still wasn't feeling up to bending to get it.

Bitsy picked it up and wrote, handing Blair the little notebook.  He does not believe me either.

"Momma, I believe you are having bad dreams. I believe you are very scared about Peter.  But I promise, nothing bad will happen."

I'm sorry, Blair, for upsetting you.  I didn't know who to talk to. You love Todd as much as me, so I tried.

"I know you love him.  And he will be all right, so will all of us."

Bitsy relented, and shook her head in agreement.  She walked out of the bathroom into the bedroom, and directly to the door.  She turned back for a moment, only to wave softly.

Blair sank to the bed grasping the letter and the drawings in her hand again.  She turned back to the one of Peter, shrouded in darkness, and Todd, being abused, and wept.

Todd came back into the room, without Jewel, and said, "She's perfectly okay with the boys. Ray is even being quiet around her . . . Blair?"  He said, as he got closer.  "Babe?"

She'd struggled to get the papers behind her before he saw them, and fell against him crying.  He took her to his chest, and held her, and rested his chin on the top of her head.  "Hey, hey, what's all this?"

She wanted to say something, but she couldn't, and instead just cried.  Over her shoulder, he saw the papers, and on top, the drawing of his past.  He swallowed, and looked to the ceiling before saying, "Momma upset you."

"Oh, Todd," she barely got out.

"Shhh, now, it's okay.  Come on.  We're happy today.   It's Jewel's birthday.  Her zero one.  Why don't we have a little family party before I take off to Chicago?"

She pulled back from him, "Todd . . " she searched his face with her eyes, and attempted to stop crying.  Her heart was breaking with the reminder of his life and experiences staring at her from a white page.

"It's okay, Blair.  I'm okay." He said, softly.

"No, Todd," she said, falling toward him again in sobs. 

"It's over, Babe.  Trust me, it's over."

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