The Shadows Fall: Chapter 16 (adult)

The next morning, Jack had a predictably difficult time getting up for school.  "Let's go, Jack.  Time for school."  Todd pulled the covers off Jack.

"I can't.  My head."

"Should have thought of that last night.  You are going."

  

"Are you serious?"  Jack got angry.

"Yeah, let's go."

"Okay Mr. Toughguy, let me have 15 more minutes."

"No, Wise Ass, you can't.  Now get up, the bus will be here in a few minutes.  If you don't get up, I'll help you do it."  Todd left the boy and went back to his own room.  Blair was still asleep.  She'd been worried and stressed out with guilt, and feeling overtired.  He would let her rest and deal with getting the boys to school.  Or, at least he would try.  Sam was easier.  He jumped right up and hugged Todd around the legs and then ran to take his shower.  Todd went back to Jack's room.  Starting a cold shower, he went to the bed and got his son up, dragging him to his feet.  He walked him into the bathroom, opened the shower, and shoved.  

Jack yelled out loudly, to the point that Blair came running in.  "What is it?"

"Nothing,  Jack's just getting ready for school.  I've got this."  He put his arm around her shoulders and walked her back to her bed.  "Lie down, babe.  Rest some more.  I've got this, I told you."

"Are you sure?"

"Yep.  These are my boys.  I lost years of doing this.  It's actually kind of fun."

She closed her eyes but not until saying, "I love you, Todd."

He kissed her cheek and smoothed her hair.  Then, he headed back to Jack in the bathroom.  He was coming out of the shower, which he had changed over to hot.  He was applying deodorant and getting clothes out.  "So, you know we need to talk."

Jack ignored him.

"I have a lot to say to you, so I changed my mind about the bus.  We'll talk in the stretch."  He headed down to make sure Sam was dressed, fed and ready for his yellow bus' arrival.

"Bye Mom."  He heard Sam call from the bottom of the stairs.  He looked at Todd, who was making his way down.  Sam had a lunchbox that was not all the way closed, and had some papers sticking out of the sides.  His jacket was buttoned wrong and one shoe was untied.  

Todd scooped him up.  "Where's your glasses?"

"Right here."  He went into his own pocket and took them out.  He put them on.  "Better?"

"Did you eat something?"

"Yep.  I had toast and bacon.  I know how to make the microwave kind of bacon myself."

"Bacon in the microwave?"

"Yeah, Dad.  You've kind of been gone a while."

"Well, I'm sure glad I am back.  And I'm glad you're here with me," Todd said, and the little boy hugged his neck.  Jack was making his way down the stairs in time to watch the scene.

"Me too.  You're my best friend.  Can you bring me down, now?  I gotta go!"  Sam said.

"Sure."  They boarded the elevator, and went to the lobby.  The bus was just pulling up.

"The bus is here!  I have a test today on my spelling words.  I love you!" and he ran out to the bus.  Todd watched him step on board before closing leaving the lobby of the building.  Before the bus drove off, his eye caught a man, in a fedora, face unreadable, across the street, ahead of the bus, staring at it.  His heart leaped in his chest, and he broke out in a cold sweat, frozen for a moment.  Before he knew it, the man had turned his stare toward him.  Wild with protective urges and fear, he started to the door to run out and confront him.  As the bus drove past the man, he vanished.  He's gone.  Get a grip and go to see McBain later to follow up on that gift.

He got back into the elevator and entered the penthouse to see Jack at the bottom of the stairs, sitting.  "Hey," he said to his son, throwing his keys on the desk.

"Hey.  I feel...I feel sort of stupid."

Todd was glad but didn't let on.  "Why?"

"I thought I was going to be some big man at that bar.  I'm not.  I guess I'm not so tough.  I'm just a kid, aren't I?"

Todd sat next to him.  "Yeah, you are.  But you're my kid, though."

Jack looked at his own hands.  "I am being a pain in the ass.  I can tell I am, but when I am, I can't stop it, and when I'm not being one, I don't care if I am for some reason."

"You're not a...you're not.  You need some help, that's all.  This is a hard time for you.  Think about it.  You grew up with Zeus as your Dad.  Then, you lost him sort of when he and your Mom broke up.  Then, you lost him again when you found out he never was your father.  And then, you got me, with all my strange problems and situations.  I can relate to this, believe me.  You've been through a lot lately.  But you need some help with it."

"I thought you were against therapy.  I am. I don't believe in that kind of stuff.  Like when you had that problem and you went inside yourself?  He came and he did practically nothing.  That's why I said, I thought you would be against it."

"I used to be.  Not now.  Not ever again.  It didn't seem like much, but my work with Ray is what makes me able to love your mother, and love you all, and protect you without having more episodes and scaring the people I care about.  Maybe even having a breakdown.  But I can tell you something that goes back before I was captured, and I think it will help you see."

"What?"

"When I was a little younger than you, well, you know what happened to me.  After that, I was one angry sonofabitch.  And I was out to prove my worth to Peter Manning and everyone else.  I grew stronger, I had a good football career.  I was strong and physically fit.  I was popular, pretty wealthy.  At the same time, I was crumbling inside from everything that happened.  My anger took over my life.  I made some terrible mistakes.  One was raping Marty Saybrooke."

"I don't understand that.  You had a lot of girls after you, if you were popular and a football player."

"It wasn't about getting girls.  It was all about anger.  I wanted to punish her for hurting me the only way I knew.  The only way - because it had also devastated me.  I wanted her to pay.  But, if I had been in therapy as a kid, after losing my mother, and being mistreated, maybe those things would never have happened.  If I had two parents who loved me and knew I needed help."  

In the midst of this, Blair came to the top of the stairs and silently sat, listening.  

Todd went on, "Even if I was able to fully participate in therapy with Ray, the first time, so much could have been avoided.  So, yeah, I was against it once, but now, I'm positive it is what has saved me.  Aside from one other thing."

Jack thought about it and looked to his father's face.  "Mom?"

"Yes.  When I met your mother, I was infatuated with some other girl.  She was trying to save me with religion, and that was almost impossible to do.  We were too different. But your mom and I, we were so much the same.  We understood each other, and we still do, even today.  She wanted to be friends, at first, but from the first moment I saw her at Rodi's, I loved her."

Blair rested her chin on her arm, elbow propped on her knee, and her eyes misted over, as she recalled Rodi's and the park bench.  She wiped a tear and attended to listening, as Todd continued, "I always loved her.  Always."

To Todd's relief, Jack looked puzzled, and his mind was going just where Todd wanted it to go.  "If you always loved her, why were you always apart?"   Good Manning.  Perfect.

"You really want to know?"

"Yeah."  Jack was a captive audience, and Todd knew he was getting somewhere.  

"It was two things.  My fear and my anger.  I was scared of loving her, and scared that she could not possibly love me.  And my anger took over, when I was jealous, or hurt by something she did, even if she didn't mean it.  It made me do things that always resulted in our ending up apart.  Even if we almost got back to each other, something would happen.  And usually, it was caused by me or my inability to accept love from her."

Jack thought.  "Why didn't you keep going to therapy, then?"

"People told me to.  Your Aunt Viki.  Tea.  Sam, who you don't remember.  But your Mom, she never did.  For one reason.  She knew me so deeply, she knew that I'd only be able to go when I accepted it.  And it hurt her so much along the way, and it hurt me.  It even hurt you, in a roundabout way."

"How?"

"I gave you away.  Remember?"

Jack had almost forgotten.  "I forgave you.  I almost forgot about it."

"I know.  But I did it out of fear and hatred.  I hated myself.  I never forgave myself for Marty, for anything I did to your Mom, for anything wrong I did.  I needed help to do that."

"So why didn't you go get it?"

He looked at his son, and touched his arm.  "Because I was sure I could handle it myself.  Just like you." 

Jack looked down and swallowed.  A bit of time passed, and the three of them sat, quiet, pensive.

Todd said, "Well, it's time for school, I'm going to have Williams take you."

"Dad?"

"Yeah, Jack?"

"Do you think Ray will like me?"

"Sure.  I think he will.  Great hair.  You're a likeable guy, when you're not calling people names, mouthing off and acting up."

Jack smiled.  Blair was crying at the top of the stairs, watching.  Todd got up to call down to his driver and Jack got his things together.  Todd watched as his son got into the elevator and departed.  He turned and saw her at the top of the stairs, sitting, in her white nightie and robe.  "Hi."

"Todd, I..."

"I love my kids, Blair, it's always been that way."

"And I love you."  She ran down the steps to him and threw her arms around him.  "Thank you, for loving us."

He held her in his arms, and she felt the baby move.  "Oh my God!  She moved Todd!"  She grabbed his hand quickly and put it on her stomach.

"Isn't it a little early for that?"

"I'm four months.  It's almost Christmas, it's about right.  There!  Feel her?"

"I think I actually did feel Moonbeam moving."

"What is it with you and that name?"  She smiled.  "I can't believe how lucky we are to get to raise this baby together.  A miracle."

"You are,"  he kissed her.

"I'll make us breakfast," she said, walking off to the kitchen in a swirl of white.

Todd went to the phone and dialed.  "I'd like to speak to the Managing Editor of The Banner, please.  I'll wait.  Todd Manning, The Sun."

The voice on the other end said, "Ben Crawford, Managing Editor."

"Mr. Crawford, Todd Manning, publisher of The Sun.  I'd like to meet with you to discuss something, a story I've come up with.  Interested?"

"Why would you be meeting with me about it?"

"Because you happen to be in it."

"Really?  Hmm.  You have peaked my curiosity in an odd way, Mr. Manning.  What is this about?"

"Why don't you meet me at The Break Bar today around, say, 3:00?  We can talk about it then.  Familiar surroundings, you know."

The voice changed, "I'm not interested in meeting you.  This must be some kind of joke.  I'm not entertained, good day."  He hung up.  More than ever, Todd was certain he was on to something.

Blair came out with the tray, and plopped herself down, eating a bowl of fruit and yogurt.  He walked over and sat next to her, taking his coffee and sipping it.  She asked, "What was that about?"

"Something is going on.  I can't put my finger on it yet, but when I do, you'll know about it.  Has to do with The Break Bar, which is where I found Jack."

She didn't respond.  "You're going to get through to him.  I can tell.  He loves you, Todd."

"I know.  He'll be okay.  He has us."

"Big difference from what you or I had, huh?"

"That's my goal."

"It's working.  Look at Sam, and how he loves you.  He hasn't asked for Zeus in weeks.  Now, what about The Break Bar?"

"I saw something that I think will lead to a juicy story."

"Now that's more like it!  I'm waiting for my first assignment!"

He smiled at her, touching her chin, "It will be a good one, if it's what I think.  I just need another day or so to check it out.  So, later today, I'm headed over there to see what I can dig up."

"Can I go?"

"I think it's better I go alone, so I can talk to some people.  Next time."

"All right, I'm kind of tired anyway, still."

"Blair, are you okay?"

"I think so, just so tired.  It's been a tough few days."

"Let's just relax the rest of the day until I have to hit the bar.  What do you say?"

"It's quiet, nice and peaceful."

"Yep."

"Want to take a bath?"

"Perfect.  Let's go.  Nice and warm."  They climbed the stairs together, arm in arm, and retired to the master bedroom, he ran the bath and she got their favorite bath oil ready.  When she got into the bathroom, he was already in the tub.  "Come on in," he put out his hand.  She stepped out of her nightgown and he noticed her stomach getting rounder.  It brought a surge of bliss to him.  She dripped a little of the oil into the tub.  "Is it safe?"  he asked her.

"Yes.  It actually helps build up the fluid for the baby and relax us.  Me and her."

"And me,"  he put his head back against the tub.  She had intentionally remade the bathroom to include a large, deep tub with jets along the sides.  It was tall and large enough to accommodate both of them comfortably.  She looked at him enjoying the warm water.  His arms propped along the rim, his head leaned back, his god-like form submerged within the froth from the jets, his feet on either side of her.  His knees were poking out a bit from the water.  She would often forget just how tall he was until a moment like this.  She felt something stir in her; he made her feel so much like a woman whenever he was near her.  She took one of her feet and made a path up his thigh.  He lifted his head from the tub and looked at her.

Their eyes connected and he put out both hands, she took them and he lifted her above the waterline until she was positioned over him.  As she slid herself onto him, they both let out sighs of passion.  He put his hands over her breasts, massaging them, then sliding his hands to her hips, using them to gently move her up and down.  She smiled down at him, her hair, now passing her shoulders, falling in curved crests around her face.  Their intensity increased and he moved his hand, using his thumb to pleasure her until she cried out.  Hearing her moans and sighs, and his name on her lips, he was triggered to his end, stroking her stomach, sitting up higher for a moment to kiss her.  Then, he sank back against the tub, and brought her onto his chest, letting the warm water jets run over both of them.

They emptied the tub a while later, and he carried her to the bed and dressed her in her nightie.  He loved the feeling of caring for her, as if she were a porcelain doll, that he wanted to cherish and keep.  She fell asleep almost immediately, and after securing the fact that she was, he dressed and got ready for his plan to hit the LPD and The Break Bar. 

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