Hope from the Ocean: 19

"Todd?"  

He had fallen asleep with his head on Sam's bed, still sitting in the chair.  He picked his head up.  "Hey."

Blair walked over to him, and he brought her onto his lap.  "Hi, Mommy.  How ya feeling?"

"I'm okay.  I haven't had any cramps in about 3 hours.  You've been here all that time?"

"Yeah.  I think I fell asleep."

"Look at him, Todd."

"I know."

"He's so little."

He nodded.  "He was . . . lucky."

She rested her head on his shoulder.  "Thank you, Todd.  My God, thank you."

"He's my son, Blair."

"I know, but . . . just thank you.  For everything, Todd."

He held her close.  "Thank you, too."

"For what?  Whining?"

"Come on, Blair.  You gave me the chance to be human again.  You were the first person who did that after a long time.  And you give me everything."

"That's because I love you."

"Same here."

She picked up her head and looked into his eyes.  "Are we going to lose the baby, Todd?"  His hand was resting on her middle.

"No.  We're not."

"Are we going to lose each other?"

"No."

"All right."  She rested her head back down, and closed her eyes.

He said, "Are you supposed to be up out of bed?"

"The nurse said it was okay to go for a walk to see Sam."

"K."

"I keep thinking what you've been through.  Look at your hands, they're all bandaged."

"That's okay.  No biggie.  I've been through worse."

"I know.  I think of that a lot, too."

"Well, stop.  It makes no sense to go over and over it now.  It really makes no sense at all anymore.  It's something that happened.  We have to let go."

She tilted her head up, surprised to hear him say it.  "I know.  Can you let go?"

"Yeah, I can."

"Of everything?"

"Most of it, yeah."

"It's not the time, but, the Patrick Thornhart thing is going to come back around, Todd.  I know it is.  We were just about to get into it again when Jack ran down the stairs."

"Jack knew what he was doing," he quipped.

"It will come back up."

"I know.  We'll deal with it when we come to it.  Not tonight."

"Okay, not tonight.  Sam's so still."

"He's healing."

"He's tiny."

"He's all right."

"When you pulled him out of the snow, and he was so blue, I just thought . . ."

"I know.  I thought it too, at first."

"He's breathing.  He's pink.  He's so sweet."

"He's going to be back to normal in a few hours," Todd reminded her.

"Normal.  I'm glad.  I wish we were home, all of us, safe."  

"We will be.  Soon."

***


Timothy sat by Dorian and put his hand on her shoulder.  "You are getting tired."

"I am, but it's worth it to be here for Blair."

"Seems something's repaired between you and Todd?  I saw what ya did to help him earlier."

"You might say that."

"I just did."

"He's trying, Timothy."

"And so are ya, too.  I think it's wonderful, Dorie.  What about Bridgette?"

"She's really the one I'm worried about here.  She was so . . . irrational.  Todd was trying, but she just needed to be snapped out of it, and he couldn't bring himself to do that."

"So there goes Auntie Dorie.  Ya made a difference.  She's in Sam's room with Todd."

"Hopefully she'll continue to do well.  Being upset that way is not good for the baby.  I'm so relieved that Sam is all right.  He's the sweetest little boy."

"He's a joy, he is.  Reminds me so much of my son. . ."

"The one that died?"

"The one that was murdered.  By The Men of 21, and Hesser."

"I'm sorry.  It must be hard to see your child taken that way."

"It's not anything a person can describe.  It just is."

"Well, I am sorry for all of that.  Regardless."

"Thank ya.  Oh, here they come."

Dorian looked up to see Todd and Blair, holding hands.  For a moment, she was transported back in time looking at them, and then as they approached closer, she said, "You're looking better!"

Blair said, I"m fine, Dorian, I'm really all right.  Sam's going to be fine."  She looked at Todd for reassurance.

"He is.  And now he knows what it would be like if he jumped in the snow from the roof."  Todd said.

"I guess he's found out, the hard way, eh?  That little dickens."  Timothy said.

"I'm certain that is what this is about.  He mentioned it so many times.  We've had a lot of snow, he's very fascinated by it."  Blair added, sitting down.  "Where are the kids?"

"We sent them home with Viki.  Shaun left, too.  They knew everything was all right.  Jack was despondent; he needed rest."  Dorian added.

"Hey, before we get too comfortable, why don't we go get something to eat?  I'm pretty starved."  Todd said, putting his hand out to his wife.  She took it and got back up.

He said, "Auntie Dorian, Dad?  My treat."

"Don't mind if I do," Timothy said.  "I feel like we've done this already.  Anyone having dejavu aside from this old man?"

"It was with Jack.  The four of us, left here, waiting to see him through it."  Blair said.  Todd realized again just how much pain she had already withstood regarding her children, and why she might be experiencing such fear.  She'd lost so much.  Her voice interrupted his thoughts.

"It feels so long ago.  So much has changed since then," Blair said.

Todd knew she was right.  Bitsy had been found, her story revealed, and in turn, his also.  He'd faced his demons, with Blair's help.  Her love had been a beacon for him, and place to come back to for most of his adult life.  He'd find a way to do the same thing.  Whatever it took.

"Let's go," she said, slipping her arm in his.  "I could use some pancakes.  I'm hoping chocolate chip."

The four of them went off to have something to eat.

***

Starr, who had gone home to Unforgettable with Jack, sat beside him in the family room.  He had started a fire that was now roaring and glowing golden in the dark of night.  He said, "Sam almost died today.  I should have been taking care of him.  I promised that nothing would hurt him as long as I was his big brother.  I blew it, right?"

"No.  You ran and got help.  You'd warned him not to jump like that.  You couldn't know what he was planning."

"I just . . . I should have been right with him, paying closer attention."

"You did what you could for him.  When it counted.  He knows that."

Jack took a swig of his bottled water and said, "I don't know.  I just wish he didn't do that.  It makes no sense."

"It made sense in his little head.  He thought it was going to be soft, like clouds."

"I told him he was wrong about that.  Just the other night."

"He didn't believe you," she said, and then laughed, slightly.

He laughed akwardly as well, and said, "He never listens to me, unless we're scheming."

"The opposite game," she reminded him.

"Yeah, that.  He loved it.  And it saved him, and Hope, during the Mitch thing."

She thought a minute.  "Think that Mitch thing made him more willing to do this, like somehow affected him?"

"Maybe.  Not sure."

"At least he's alive, and he's going to make it."

"The little runt."  Then, "He'd better get home fast."  Jack said.

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