Diamond in the Rough: Chapter 51

Jack rounded the corner at school and bumped into her.  It was Jenna again, her hair shining and smelling of pears and soap.  

"Excuse me," she said, ignoring him and moving on.

"Jenna, it's me!"

"Who?"  she said, with a puzzled expression.  "I'm sorry I don't know you."

Voices surrounded them both, and her expression turned to fear.  "No, please, leave me alone!"  she cried, backing away from him.

"Jenna, wait, what's this about?"

"Just leave me alone, please, don't hurt me . . ." and she disappeared into the crowd.  He tried to push his way through the people to get to her.  He could see the top of her head in the midst of everyone and kept moving people to the side to get through.  Each time he did, the ocean of heads became larger and larger, until finally, he was lost in a sea of faces that had all turned to stare back at him.  Each of them was the face of a dead man.

Jack jerked awake, sitting up with a start in the dark.  He noticed his hands were clenching the sheets on either side of him.  He struggled, in the blackness, to fight the urge to drink himself to sleep.  Instead, he got up, and turned not toward the staircase to go down to the lower level, but to the left, and to his brother's door.  He peeked in, and Sam was sleeping in a ball on the far side of his bed.

Jack crept in and looked at his little brother, sleeping soundly, and turned to go.  Walking back toward his room, he stopped.  The pull of his parents' bedroom door made him stand perfectly still in the black hallway.

***

"Todd," Blair said, dreamily, almost asleep again.

"Hmm?" he responded, also drifting close to slumber.

"Todd, I love you."

"I know.  I love you, too."

"I want a baby, Todd.  Yours and mine."

His eyes opened in the dark.  "You have a baby.  Do you want me to get him?"

"I want another baby.  I want Sommer."  He realized she was half asleep, but his heart broke for her, and now, he was wide awake, holding his hand over the crown of her head.

He wasn't sure what to say, so he said, "Sommer's gone."

She got very quiet.  After a few minutes, she sniffed.  "I know she is."

"We have time.  Maybe . . ."

"No.  No, Larry said," she was falling asleep, at last.  "Larry said . . .no, Todd.  I was . . . stupid to think it and get our hopes up."

"No, Babe."  He petted her hair, hoping she might fall into dozing.

"I have to tell you something," she said, now sounding instantly more awake.

"Okay."

"Oh, Todd, I'm so . . .sad," she wept.

He felt a lump grow in his throat, and he swallowed it down, resistant to his own pain in order to help her.  "I know, but you shouldn't be.  Look what we have?  Three beautiful bio kids, and one little dock-ded wonder."

She laughed in spite of herself.  

He said, "God, I love that little boy."

"I know, me too.  He's so special."  She snuggled into him, and he could hear her yawn.  "Todd, do you think we'll ever really have another baby?"

He saw her tilt her head toward him, and he stroked her cheek with his fingers, "Maybe.  I don't think it's out of the question, but I can't know the answer.  Do I think Larry could be wrong?  Yeah.  He told me as much.  Do I think he could be right?  Yeah.  Both.  Whatever comes, I'm okay as long as we're together for it.  Either way."

"Yeah," she said, dreamily again, and he stroked her hair, but not until he slid himself back into a lying position, with her against him, her head on his chest.  He continued to caress her, and soon, she was breathing the shallow breaths that told him she had dropped off.

He lay there, still awake.  Chains from the ceiling.  Oh, they're back?  Manning, are you going to figure out what that's about, or not?  He ran his hand over his own hair and shut his eyes tight to stop himself from remembering.  Mitch had done something to his mother, that possibly left her unable to speak and think.  He was positive of it.  It was just like him.  Perfect revenge.  Perfect pain.  His mother, his wife, himself.  His nieces, his sister.  No.  It was more than enough reason.  He'd have to find a way.

Soft knocking came on their door, and Todd, still awake, heard it and quietly got out from under Blair to go and answer it.  Opening the door, he was greeted with his son, Jack, who was shirtless.  The boy's forehead was slick with sweat.

"Dad?"  he whispered.

"What's the matter, Jack?"

"I . . . just . . ."

Todd, his eyes adjusting to the dark, made out the lines of Jack's face, and then immediately put his hand on the base of the boy's neck.  He said, "Hey, it's all right now.  Mom and I are right here.  Why don't you sleep in here, Jack.  Use the sofa."

Jack nodded.

***

Sister Rebecca Katherine sat by Bitsy, who was now lying on the nun's bed.  Dr. Levin was standing nearby.  Bitsy opened her eyes, and was immediately frightened when she saw Dr. Levin standing over her.  The sister said, "No, Dear, Bea, the doctor won't hurt ya."

The woman sat up, and leaned on her elbows, propping herself.  Sister Rebecca Katherine scrambled for a pen and pad, and handed it to her.  Bitsy took them, and placed them next to her on the bed.  She took her hands and put them into the air above her head, as if conjuring something.  Sister Rebecca Katherine said, "A dream, Lass?"

She nodded.

"A nightmare, eh?" the nun said.

Bitsy nodded again, and took the pad.  It was Todd.  He hurt him.  Oh, so badly, Sister.  Todd was just a little boy.

"Yes, that's right.  Todd was a little boy when The One Who Hurt You did those things."

Bitsy scribbled.  Does he have a name?  The One Who Hurt Us?

"Yes.  He's Peter.  Peter Manning."

The woman's face turned ashen.  My God.  I was Barbara Manning.  Todd was our son.  Peter was my husband.  He was powerful.  He knew things, about me.  About how I thought.  About what I did when I was not around him.  My God!  Sister, he hurt Todd.  Very badly.

"It's all right.  That was many years ago, Dear."

Dr. Levin spoke.  "Bea, I want to help you get over these things.  If you give me the opportunity to speak with you . . ."

Bea turned her head.  She took the pen and pad, and wrote, I can't trust you.  You are a man, and men hurt us with their bodies.  ALL THE TIME.  I won't talk with you.  I won't.  I've met a lot of men in the white jackets, like yours.  They all had them, just like yours.  Some of them . . . hurt me.  Some of them said the sparrows were not real.  Some of them said The One Who Hurt Us was not real.  I don't want to talk to you.  Only her.

The nun looked at Dr. Levin, and he nodded to her, saying, "I'll leave you for the time being, Bea.  Sister, thank you, and good night."

The nun said, "Bea, you are wrong about Dr. Levin. . ."

She shook her head "no."

"Ya are, Dear.  Not all people can be the same.  Are there people, are there nuns that might not be nice?"

She shrugged.

"I won't press ya now.  But ya need some help.  Ya need to be able to talk to someone, and someone who has the right tools to help ya."

She pointed at the nun.

"I can try, but I'm not a doctor.  You know that."

She took the pad.  What happened to Todd's face?

The nun was uncertain.  She read it, and said, "An accident."

She wrote, No.  That's not true.  I can tell by your eyes.

"It was an accident.  No one meant for it to happen."

She took the pen again, Is it best I don't know?  Is it something secret?  Something bad?

The nun nodded.  "You should ask Todd.  It's his right to tell ya about his life."

Bea's hand was working quickly, I want to know more about him.  Does he see the sparrows?  Does he forgive me for leaving him?  Does he forgive me for not knowing?  Does he think I should have?  He is very beautiful, Sister.  I can see it in his eyes.

The nun teared up.  "Oh, he is.  That he is.  His life has been a blend of both good and bad.  He is a wonderful father.  And he is a loving husband.  Two very important things."

She smiled, and stood.  Bea took her hand, and putting it next to her own head, she waved.  Then, she turned and was gone, and headed back to her room.

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