Diamond in the Rough: Chapter 28

"My goodness, it's my boy!  He's on the front page.  I'm so proud."  Sister Rebecca Katherine was flagging down anyone who would stop and see the picture of Todd on the front page with Jenna, Blair, and Starr. "Look how handsome he is, eh?"


Sister Elizabeth Mary said, "My, my, he's quite the handsome one.  Is that a friend or a nephew?"


"He's my son!"  She shouted, and then correcting herself, said, "Well, more like a surrogate son, I've adopted him and his family.  I love them all a great deal."


"That's precious," she responded.


Tina was passing by with her dinner tray, when she was hit in the arm with the evening edition of The Sun.  She took the paper, and hiding her irritation, opened it to the front page.  "Oh, nice photograph," she said, and stuck the paper under her arm, walking by Sister Rebecca Katherine.  It IS Todd.  God, the irony.  Where can someone get a decent steak around here?


She walked with her tray to a seat removed from the others.  So, it was Todd after all.  This nun is really into Todd's business.  I might need her.  I wonder what her real motives are?  What if . . .I call him. . .


"Todd?  Don't hang up."


"What do you want?  It's been years.  What, did you run out of money?"


"Todd, that's not fair.  Now, give me a break, I mean, we have so much to catch up on."


"No.  You're not getting a penny.  No, I won't help you out of trouble, or jail or away from some loser, or trying to get your kids back, or anything else."


"Please?"


"No."


"Come on, I mean, I'm your sister, and the only whole one you have. . . I think.  You might want in on this one. . . right?  Todd?"


She came out of her daydream, and saw the gray-haired nun standing by her table.  "Dear, would ya like to give me the paper back?  You took it with ya when you passed by."


"Sorry, Sister.  I'm not sure what I was thinking," she said, batting her green-blue eyes and smiling broadly.


***


Jack disembarked the copter and stood on the roof of Unforgettable.  Todd took a look at his expression, and said, "It feels good, doesn't it, to have home under your feet?"


Jack looked at his father, both of them dealing with windblown hair in the December air.  "Yeah.  It does.  Dad . . ."


"How can I get you to trust me, Jack?  Because if you know what it will take, I'd do it."


"I trust you."


"You don't.  Not really.  You didn't talk to me, when things were getting out of hand.  I asked you, and you didn't tell me.  Look, it's cold out here, let's go in to my room and start a fire and finish this."


They headed in to the master bedroom, where the quiet embraced them right away.  Jack said, "Where's Sam?"


"Your mother went to get the boys."


"How is she, Dad?"


"For someone who almost lost another child, she's going to be all right."


"I . . . feel bad about it.  Timothy said I was being selfish."


"Were you?"  Todd asked, putting two logs on the fire and sitting down across from his son.


"I guess I was, yeah."


"You didn't talk to us, to me.  I don't know where to go with that."


"I didn't want to hurt you, I didn't want to ask things.  I didn't want to bother you.  Both of you, it looked like you were trying to get through every day, without it coming up.  It was so hard to figure out a time that would be right."


"In the future, don't wait for one.  Please.  Both your mother and I want to be there for you.  No matter what we're going through at the time."


"I couldn't, Dad.  If things were going good, I didn't want to be the one to bring it down.  If things were going bad, I didn't want to add to it."


"What about Shaun, what about Starr?  Anyone else.  Turning to the bottle was just dumb shit."


Jack nodded.  


Todd asked, "Why at the art show?  That was Jenna's big night.  You realize you compromised that."


"I know.  I'm lucky she forgives me.  I guess it was the only place where I could get my hands on some.  I've been wanting to, like fade away, since Thanksgiving.  I just . . . didn't know what to do.  It was . . . hard to sleep, hard to do anything.  Too much of everything.  I don't know what else to say."


"Thanksgiving . . ."  Todd stopped, and in his mind, a memory of Blair, outside in the cold chasing him came to mind.  He pushed it back and said, "I'm sorry about that."


"It wasn't that.  Things just seemed to get worse then.  After I read about Grandfather Victor's crypt, I had trouble sleeping."


"There's more to it than that.  You and I talked about the crypt part."

"I know.  But, I . . . I have a lot of dreams about it.  But it's me in the coffin with the corpse, not you.  Corpses coming after me.  Because I . . . well, because . . ."

"Because you're bad, like I am?  A bad person?"

Jack nodded.  "I'm not saying you're a bad person, I'm saying, yeah, I'm bad.  I . . . killed Mrs. Morasco.  I didn't mean it, but no matter how many times I say that, it doesn't change things.  She's gone.  And I wonder what my punishment will be.  Later.  You know."


"Who says you'll be punished?  And if you were, why would it be that way?"

"I don't know.  Maybe Hell is what your worst fears are."

"You're not going to any Hell."

"How do you know?"

"Because I do.  You're sorry, that's what counts.  It was an accident.  It was a terrible one, but it was an accident."

"Once I found out about the crypt, I couldn't breathe, Dad.  I felt like I was drowning.  I had to get it out of my head.  The best way I knew was to stop feeling."  


"Everyone makes choices.  You did, I did.  Yours almost cost you something vital.  Your life.  Now, we have to figure out how to make it so that when things are hard, you're not trying to fade away again."


Jack nodded.  "I think I know."


Todd said, "Go ahead."


"Timothy.  He said he would help me, and I believe him."


Todd slightly smiled, and looked skyward, his eyes moistening.  "Timothy.  Yeah, that sounds like a good idea.  I was thinking Ray, but this could work."


"Dad, I know you love Ray, and I know he's a great therapist, but I'm not sure it's working for me.  Not with this.  Timothy knows what it's like, to have this thing drive you to be blotto.  He told me."


"He does.  You're right."


"I figure he can help me with that, and you can help me with everything else."


"Hmf," Todd looked at his hands, "I haven't done so well so far."


"You have, Dad.  You just don't know it.  You saved my mother, not once but twice.  You came back, all messed up, but still had time to love me."


"That's not hard to do.  You're my son."


"I know.  And you're my father.  Just Dad, please, don't leave us.  Don't leave us again.  I couldn't take that.  Sam would just . . . just don't, Dad.  You just don't know what it's like."  His son's fists were tight.


Todd, overcome with emotion and feeling a bit as though he was in a dream, heard himself: "I won't."


"And, if you can, don't let anyone . . . hurt Mom, again.  After she lost Sommer, she, sort of changed."


"Oh believe me, Jack, no one's going to hurt her again.  Not as long as I'm alive."


Jack sighed, and it was a long, full outward breath.  Then he said, "I . . . love you.  I'm sorry, Dad, for what happened."


"I love you, too.  Come here, Buddy."


Jack got up and Todd did also, reaching out and putting his arms around his son's shoulders, and hugging him.  He said, "Enough of this mushy stuff, as Sam would say."


"Yeah," Jack said, indiscriminately brushing a tear off his own cheek.


"And who called for Sam?"  Blair said, from behind them.  "Jack, I am so glad you're home!"  she ran to him and put her arms around him, and held him close, swaying them back and forth.


"I'm okay, Mom."  Jack said.  


Sam was not far behind, and yelled, "Jack!" as he ran and jumped at his brother who was a slight bit unprepared for the boy's dive.  Catching him awkwardly, they stumbled back and fell into the sofa, and Jack immediately began to wrestle Sam and make him laugh.


Little Ray began to cry.  He was outside the room, in the hall, strapped in his carrier, and clearly upset to be left out.  Blair said, "Oh!  Wait, Ray, I'm sorry, Baby."  She took him out of his carrier, and he instantly stopped.  She brought him to the couch, and gave him to Jack to hold.  


Jack said, "Hey, Puny, I missed ya."  


Todd looked at the group of the three boys, and said, "Why do I feel like Fred McMurray all of the sudden?"


"Well, maybe you are Fred McMurray."  she said, linking her arm through his.


"No, I just remembered, he's single.  I have you.  Can't be replaced.  The poor sucker just had Uncle Charlie."


She looked into his face as he turned his face to hers.  "This is that thing again, when you think you have everything?"


He said, "I know.  But we won't lose it, not this time.  We've been through too much to let it go."


"What did I ever do without you, Todd?  And more importantly," her voice caught, "what would I do without you now?"


"I don't know.  I know what I did without you though, and it wasn't any good,"  he leaned down and kissed her lips gently.  "This is way better."


She smiled, her eyes shining, and said, "Yeah, I like it this way, too.  Christmas is almost here. . ." her face showed a question, "and when it's over?"

"Then comes a New Year for The Mannings, and weeks and months after that."

She smiled, "So then you're in for the long haul?"

He looked at the boys, and back to her.  "I guess you all are stuck with me."

"Yay!  We're stuck with Dad, Jack!"  Sam cheered.

Blair put her nose to Todd's and their foreheads touched.  She said, "I love you so much."


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