Port Charles Chronicles: Chapter 30

        Todd was just reaching to give his mother a hug when the bottom seemed to drop out of his world and everything tried to fade away. “No! Not now!”  He reached toward his son, who in turn grabbed his hand.  Suddenly, he found himself on his knees in the park.  He rested back on his legs and looked up at his mom.  “I don’t want to leave.  Don’t make me go, not this time.  Please.”

****

        Dr. Webber looked at the monitors. They had gotten him back but his heart rate was dangerously erratic.  Not only that, but he was still burning up with fever and the medication wasn’t making a dent.  Looking at his sister, he said.  “We’re going to have to bring down that temp. Let’s pack him in ice. I’ll go talk to his daughter.”

       Starr and Michael looked at the doctor as he came out of the cubicle.  “My dad?”

       “He’s alive.  We’re still trying to lower his temperature.  Do you have any idea how your father contracted malaria?  Has he been out of the country recently?”

      “No, he’s been here for the last couple of weeks and before that, he was in Llanview.   So he really has malaria.  Would his fever cause him to walk off a dock?”  Starr couldn’t help but pray that was the reason for her father’s bizarre behavior.

      Blair exited the elevator and overheard Starr’s last remark.  “Oh my God, no!  Where is he? I need to see him.”  She looked around frantically and then rushed into the cubicle Starr pointed out.  She stopped abruptly as she saw him hooked up to the monitors and an IV.  Like it was yesterday, she recalled walking into another ER.

     “Excuse me, Dr. Price, I’m Blair Daimler.  Is there something I can do for Todd?”

     “Are you a friend of Todd Manning’s, Ms. Daimler?”

     “Well, it looks like I’m his only friend at the moment.”

      She had saved his life that night.  Now, three weddings and two children later, things hadn’t changed much.  But this time, she felt like she had let him down.  She moved to his side.  He was pale and so quiet.  “It’s Nurse Webber, right?  Is he going to make it?”

       “I don’t know.  We’re doing everything we can to bring down his fever.  He’s been unconscious since his arrival.  I’ll give you and your daughter some time with him.”  Liz nodded at Starr and left the cubicle

       Blair reached and moved a lock of Todd’s damp hair off his face.  “Starr, what happened?   What did you mean, when you said he walked off the dock?”

      “He’s so sick.  Michael and I were looking for him when we found him at the landing to Spoon Island.  I tried to get his attention, but it was as if he didn’t hear me.   It was crazy, he just stepped off the dock.  Michael and I ran to look for him, but he didn’t surface.  We went in after him and after a few minutes, I located him.  With Michael’s help, I got him back to the dock but he wasn’t breathing.  Michael resuscitated him and he began breathing on his own again, but he's been unconscious this whole time.”  Starr walked up to the other side of her father and looked at her mom.  “We almost lost him right before you got here.  I just don’t understand what’s going on.  John said someone tried to kill him and that’s how he got sick.  You said he had the flu but why would he want to walk into the lake?”

      Looking at Todd, Blair had an idea why he might have walked into the water of his own choosing.  She knew he had been leaning that way for days.  Tomas did this, he said something to you, didn’t he?  Whatever was on that bullet just pushed you over the edge.  She leaned down close to his ear.  “Todd, please hear this.  I’m here as promised.  I brought the boys.  Please don’t give up.  I just got you back.” She kissed his cheek and stood up to face her daughter. “Your father’s been under a lot more stress than you know.  I told you about the PTSD.  It’s very real and it’s been affecting his behavior for some time. Whoever tried to kill him, weakened his ability to fight.  That has to be the reason for his actions.  Right now we need him to survive and then we can get him help.”

****

     Bitsy looked down at her beautiful son.  “Oh, Todd, I won’t send you back, I promise.  It’s not really up to me this time.”

     Todd got off his knees and pulled his mom into a hug.  He didn’t want to let go.  Everything about her was as he remembered.   “I wrote to you.  Peter kept your letters from me.  I never got them until he died.”

     “I know sweetheart.  I’ve been watching you for a long time.  You’ve had such a hard time lately.  We thought you might join us several times in the last years, but you’ve been so strong.  If this is what you truly want, you can stop fighting.”

     “I never expected to see you.   If this is where I think it is, I don’t really belong here, but if this is real or some mix up with my paperwork I’m sure going to take advantage. “  He paused, something was tickling in his ear.  “What the?...” He tried to clear the sensation and was surprised when water flowed out.  Memories of sinking into the lake filled his head, but that couldn’t be right.  He wasn’t very religious but he didn’t think people who killed themselves got to go to, for lack of a better word, “Heaven.” 

      “I’m dead, right?”

       Bitsy looked at her grandsons and turned back to Todd. She took his hand and led him over to a bench.  “Todd, this is kind of like a general meeting place for those about to die.  Mainly for lost souls who are caught between good and evil.  Someone like you.”

      “What?  I don’t understand?”

      “You’re not dead yet and it’s undecided at this time just where you belong.  We were allowed to visit with you to try and help you figure things out.”

      Todd looked around. “That’s the craziest thing I ever heard.   I knew there was some sort of glitch.  Even I know I don’t belong here with you and the boys. My past is proof of that. I do bad things. The most recent, killing my brother.  Why would the Powers that Be even hesitate to send me to join my cursed family?”

      “That’s why Todd.  All your life you’ve only acknowledged the bad in your life.  You’ve accepted it and wear it as a badge of honor.  ‘I’m a bad guy, no one should have anything to do with me.’  But you’re more than your sins.  You’re a loving son and father.  You’re not irredeemable.  You actually have quite a few people that love you, no matter what you believe about yourself.  To the Powers that Be, that means something.”

      Todd looked at his mother bewildered.  “Is that why you’re here?”  Was it possible he was being given yet another chance?

      “I believe so.  We were sent to remind you that you are loved.  Your son and Brendan both felt loved, even though they never got  to meet you in person they knew you cared for them.”

       Todd looked at Brendan. “I don’t understand?  How could you feel anything from me?  I was furious that Blair was carrying you.”

       Brendan looked at Todd and smiled. “You were mad because I wasn’t yours.  But you never really hated me.  You took care of my mom and me.  You understood she loved me and that was all that mattered.   You loved my mother and I felt that love.”

        He stared at Brendan in wonder.  “You felt that.”  He was ashamed.  Brendan was giving him credit for feelings he wasn’t so sure he had had.  It had torn him in two when Blair had become pregnant with Patrick’s child.  Secretly, he would have given anything for Brendan to have been his.  When Blair and Brendan moved back into the penthouse for Starr’s sake it had felt so good to have her home.  Being there for her had felt right.

       “Yes, I felt that.  I know you were the one who told my mother about my death.  You were the one who comforted her because you knew how much I meant to her.”  Brendan got down in front of Todd and touched his hand. “I love you for that.”

       Todd’s eyes filled with tears at Brendan’s words.  He was too choked up to say anything. Then he felt a hand on his shoulder and looked into his son’s eyes. 

       “You love more than most, but you’re too unwilling to admit it.  It took you forever to tell Mom you loved her.  But I knew you loved me.  It was in your touch when you would feel me move.  You wanted to give me that love because you wanted to make sure I would never feel alone.  You succeeded.  I know you loved me, Dad, and I know you’ve never forgiven yourself for the words you said to Mom the night I died.   You need to forgive yourself for that and so many other things.  I love you and I don’t like to see you hurting so bad.”

        It was too much.  Todd began to cry and Bitsy folded him into her arms and held him.

****

       Blair was startled as she noticed tears begin to fall down Todd’s cheek.  “Todd, what is it?  What’s the matter?”  He didn’t acknowledge her.  “Oh, please, come back.  I want to help.”

      “He’s crying.  Maybe he’s coming around.  I’ll get Dr. Webber.” Starr turned to leave just as Doctor Webber came into the cubicle.  “Something is going on with my father.  Is he waking up?”

      Dr. Webber moved to examine Todd.  He checked his eyes but they were still unfocused. “He’s still in some kind of coma.   The good news is that his temperature is starting to lower.  I’d like to run an EEG to test his brain activity.  If he’s crying, he must be experiencing something mentally, and an EEG will give us more information to work with.”

****

        Blair looked at her watch.  Starr and Michael had gone to get something to eat after the hospital had run the EEG. Now she waited. Todd was still unresponsive and she had taken a chair to sit close to him, holding his hand and hoping he would know she was there. She was exhausted.  She laid her head down on Todd’s bed for just a minute to rest. The last few days had been draining.  He felt a little cooler.  The medicine was finally beginning to work and they had removed the ice packs.  Dr. Webber thought they had the malaria under control, but Todd was still comatose.

       She feared Todd’s other problem was really at fault.  No one had brought up the matter of a suicide attempt, and Blair had led Starr away from that possibility by putting the cause of her father’s actions on the fever.  She couldn’t bring herself to tell Starr what really might have happened.  The next thing she knew, she felt a hand on her shoulder and she realized she had fallen asleep.  She raised up to find Dr. Webber standing next to her.  Another doctor was with him.  “I’m sorry, I dozed off.  Did you get the results?”

      “I have them.  Mr. Manning’s scan was not what we expected and I brought Dr. Drake to explain the findings.”

       Blair looked from one doctor to the other. “That doesn’t sound good.  Please tell me what you found.”

       “Mrs. Manning, …” started Dr. Drake.

       “It’s Cramer, Mr. Manning is my fiance.  I’m sorry.  Go ahead”

       “Ms. Cramer, Mr. Manning’s EEG is showing definite signs of multiple infarctions which appear to have short-circuited his brain patterns.  Is Mr. Manning prone to seizures?’

       “No, and I don’t understand.  Could you explain in English?”

        “I’m seeing what could possibly be a number of lesions that in essence have caused the brain to find alternate paths to keep working.  Although he might appear to be perfectly fine.  In reality, his perceptions could be off.  Has he been complaining of headaches?”

      “Yes, he’s had a number of severe headaches since I’ve been with him.  He said they were tension headaches.”  Blair glanced down at Todd.  “They’ve been quite brutal.  Are you saying something in his brain could cause them?”

      “I don’t know for sure, but I’d like to do an MRI of his brain to get a picture of what is going on in there.  You also said he isn’t prone to seizures.  Do you know if he’s been in contact with a faulty appliance or anything that might give him a severe shock?   I’ve seen a similar EEG on a prisoner that was brought in here after being tasered.”

       Hearing Dr. Drake mention tasers brought back the horror she had felt when Todd told her he had been strapped to a chair and his captors had routinely shocked him with high doses of electricity.  No one had thought to have Todd examined by a regular doctor.  “Dr. Drake, up until a year ago, Todd was held captive and repeatedly tortured for eight years.  One of the methods he described was the use of electric shock to try and get him to talk.  I’m guessing it wasn’t like traditionally controlled treatments doctors use.  Would they have an impact?”

       “That wasn’t in the medical history we received from the Llanview Hospital and puts a whole new light on things.  If what you’re saying is true, we definitely need that test.”

       Blair nodded “Go ahead.  If it will help get him back, do it.”



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