The Shadows Fall: Chapter 22

A few days later, Todd enlisted the help of Starr in getting to his plan for Jack.  She agreed to stay with Blair without leaving her, while Addie tended to Hope and Sam, and Todd took Jack to the cabin for a father-son weekend.  Jack had not balked at all; he seemed to go along with the idea without hesitation, while not expressing interest or joy over it, either.  Packing a bag, he waited at the foot of the stairs, playing his Ipod, and adjusting his earphones.  Todd walked by him, yanking the cord.  "None of these on this trip."

Jack looked to his father, at first to question him, then thought better of it.  "Can we bargain about that?"

Todd smirked.  He loved this kid.  "What do you mean?"

"Can I use them when we're not talking, or when you're working or on the phone to Mom?"

Todd thought about it.  "Yeah, that sounds good.  Let's shake on it."  Jack stood up, pushing out his hand.  Todd took it and pulled his son in for a quick embrace.  "Good.  Almost ready?"

Jack nodded.  Blair, from the couch, was starting to stand.  Todd raced to her, and helped her, supporting her elbow as she stood up.  "Come here, Son,"  she said, opening her arms.  "I love you.  Give your father a chance."  She looked at Todd over Jack's shoulder.  "He's a very good man."

Jack hugged his mother, and then got his bag.  "I'm going to the lobby, okay Dad?"

Todd nodded, turning back to Blair.  "Everything you need is right here.  If not, order it.  Starr's here, Addie's here.  Wish me luck with this."

"You won't need it.  I have faith in you, especially with our children.  I've seen how you raised Starr.  You will do just fine."

"I love you, Blair.  Take care of Moonbeam," he said, kissing her.  She didn't resist the name any longer; it was his pet name for the baby, and she'd grown to enjoy his teasing.

"I love you, Todd," she said, blithely.  She watched him go.

***

At the cabin, Todd and Jack both put down their bags and looked around. Before looking at each other, both slid their hands into their front pants pockets.  Then, their eyes met.  Jack spoke, "I guess I'm more like you than I thought."

"Is that such a bad thing?"

"No.  It's not bad.  It just...it makes me understand some stuff."

"Like?"

"It makes me understand why the other guy didn't love me.  I mean, I used to think he did, but now, I know he didn't."

Todd threw a few logs into the fireplace and then sat on the sofa.  "That ought to take the chill off.  How do you know he didn't?"

"I can tell, by how you act toward me.  You...I don't know how to say it."

Todd wanted to help his son express himself, so he remained patient and listened.  "I'm not going anywhere.  Take as long as you want."

Jack turned his back to Todd, his hands still in the front pockets of his jeans.  "You like me."

Todd smiled.  "Yeah, I do like you."

"You like me like I am.  He never did.  He and I always butted heads, since I was little.  Sam's different.  He did everything the guy asked.  Me, I resisted him, all the time.  I went against everything he said.  Starr sort of worshiped him.  Of course, she somehow thought he was you.  I can see why she worships you now."  He turned and looked to his father.  "You adore her, she loves you and praises the ground you walk on, everyone can see it."

"You feel bad because you're jealous?  I mean, she knew me before, you didn't.  You're left out?"

"Kind of.  She has these great memories of you in her life as a child.  I have him.  Can I tell you that I knew he didn't love me?  All along?  I hated you for it when you came back, but I wanted you to love me like you love Starr."

"I do love you like I love Starr.  You're my son."

Jack went over and sat next to Todd.  "You do?"

"Yeah, I do.  I have to be tough on you, but I love you."

"I don't care about that.  I can see it in your eyes when you're being hard on me.  There's something in there, it makes me feel..."

Todd rested a hand on Jack's shoulder.  Jack sighed, and said, "What was your father like when you were little?"  Then, quickly, "It's okay if you can't tell me."

Todd took a deep breath.  He needed to be there for his son, and was willing to delve into whatever he had to in order to help. "I guess if I used one word, it would be cruel."

"Did he act like he didn't really want you around, until other people were there?  Then, you were suddenly important."  Jack asked.

"Yeah, you could say that.  He yelled a lot, beat my mother, beat me.  My mother left me alone with him when I was nine."

"I remember that," Jack winced.  "It was hard for you?"

"Yeah.  Imagine yourself without your mother and only the man you knew as your father growing up."

Jack did, and fidgeted.

"Jack, I know it's hard to open up about this, but, if you want to tell me everything he did, I'm okay with hearing.  I won't think of you differently.  I mean, did you think of me in any bad way after you found out everything?"

"Oh, no.  No way.  I just understood you more,"  he stopped.  "Is that what you mean about me talking to you?"

"Yeah, that's what I mean."

"Mostly, he just yelled and screamed.  Once, he pushed Starr down a flight of stairs while she was pregnant."  Todd retained his composure, while Jack shot him a glance.  "He used to choke me sometimes.  Or hit me.  Or just scare me.  You already know about the burning thing.  He probably didn't do that often because people might catch on."

Todd broke out into a sweat and needed a moment to catch his breath.  "Jack, can I take a little break for a minute?  Maybe you could go get a few more pieces of wood?"

"Sure, Dad."

Todd choked up, and Jack went on his way outside to get the wood.  Now's the time Manning.  Get him to Ray.  Just get him help.

Jack came back with four logs, and put one into the fireplace.  The rest, he left in the log cradle, and returned to his seat by Todd.  He was quiet, staring into the fire.  Todd spoke, "I was like Sam.  I just wanted everyone to love me, and be happy.  I was close to my mother, and he hated that.  He hated both of us.  Of course, I didn't know until I was older that he wasn't my father at all, and that Bitsy wasn't really my mom.  He was sick.  I keep telling myself that; he was a sick man."

"My dad was, too, I mean, the other one."

Todd assured him.  "Yes, he was, and is.  He wasn't in charge of his own actions most of the time.  And, it's okay to say he was your father.  He raised you for many years.  It doesn't hurt me, because it's true.  This all has to be confusing for you."

"Sometimes, I get so angry at what he did to me, and to Mom, Sam and Starr that I don't know how to make it go away.  I do dumb things.  I wanted someone to feel bad, like I do.  That's why I did all those terrible things to Shane.  And now..."

Todd brought Jack to his chest, and the boy cried.  "It's okay, now.  I was just the same way.  I wanted someone to hurt like I hurt.  And it caused me to do horrible things.  You're a kid, Jack.  It's not too late for you.  You can turn it all around and can leave it behind."  Todd let Jack go, and Jack wiped his eyes on his sleeve.  Todd was amazed at the number of mannerisms that he and his son shared, though they had not known each other until a matter of months before.

"My dad, and your dad, they were kind of, the same sometimes."

"Yeah.  They were."  Todd braced himself.

"Except for the sex stuff."  Jack said, looking up from his hands.

Todd was relieved.  "I just have to tell you something.  That wasn't sex, it was complete power over another person.  He wanted to control me, hurt me, in the deepest way he could.  You should never use sex as a weapon."

Jack looked into his eyes.  "I understand.  I see what it did to you, when you had it done to you and when you did it to someone else.  I know, Dad."

Todd was proud of his son just then.  "Good," he put his hand behind Jack's head and rubbed his hair affectionately.  "I'm proud to know that.  Now, what's left?  Any more questions or anything?  I mean, we have the whole weekend, but if there's anything else right now..."

"You know what I did, you know all my mistakes, and why do you still love me?"  Jack asked.

"You know what I did, you know all my mistakes, why do you still love me?"

Jack just smiled.  Todd smiled back. 

"One more thing, Dad.  I'm sorry about, well, everything you had to deal with as a kid.  You didn't have anyone.  I had Mom, you were totally alone.  And then, the torture and all that.  I'm just sorry, is all."

Todd broke, putting his forehead into his hand, and holding a hand on Jack's shoulder.  To his surprise, the boy covered his hand with his own.  Pulling himself together, he said, "Thank you.  I'm pushing through it, which brings me to the next thing."

"What?"

"You promised to listen to me."

"I did.  I am.  No more drinking.  I mean it."

"I know that.  I mean the other promise, about Ray.  Please.  I've seen what this kind of anger can do to a person, and I can't see it happen to..my son," his voice cracked.

Jack promised, "Okay.  I will.  Make an appointment, and I'll go.  If he helped you, he can't be that bad."

"No, he's not that bad.  He's actually very good at what he does."

"I don't know anyone who's been through what you have.  He had to help somehow."

"He did.  And I decided I am going to continue to see him, for a while."

"Why, Dad?  Is there more?"

Todd wasn't sure what to say to his son.  He thought for a moment.  The truth.  The truth is best.  "Yes, there's more.  There's more because eight years is a long time and lots of burns, cuts and beatings.  Lots of time for them to do everything possible to me."

Jack grimaced.  "It makes me feel sick when I think about it.  Did they like it?  Were they forced to hurt you, or did they want to?"

Todd breathed slowly.  "I'm going to answer you, I just need a minute, Jack."  Deep breathing.  Nose, not mouth.  He closed his eyes, picturing Blair, in her beauty, in a long, red halter gown, laughing with her head thrown back.  "I'm okay."  He pressed on, "Yeah, they wanted to.  I think all but one of them enjoyed what they did."

"Did they hurt Mom?"

"No.  I would have died first."

Jack was pensive for a minute.  "I'm glad you love her.  She's never been able to find someone she really loved, not like you."

"Well, the same is true for me.  She's my one true babe.  My everything."

"But, you did hurt her sometimes."

"Yeah, and she hurt me once in a while.  But, it doesn't take our love away."

Jack sat back, almost tired.  "Dad, can we go out and walk?  I hate being cooped up."

"Sure," Todd said, feeling much the same.  "A walk in this mountain air will do us both good.  The rest of this weekend is for getting to know each other, just two guys, roughing it."

Jack laughed.  It was the first real laugh Todd had ever seen, "Okay, but roughing it with electricity, lights, tons of catered food, heat, hot water and a designer cabin?" 

"Eh.  So, live a little!"

***

Jack and Todd made their homecoming late that Sunday evening, and Blair was pleased to see them bantering and comfortable with each other.  "Well, you two seem to be getting along well,"  she said, kissing Todd and Jack, each on the cheek, one at a time.


Sam ran down the stairs, "Dad!  Jack!  You're back!"  He hugged Todd's legs.


Jack scooped him up, and said, "Let's go, Squirt.  Time to throw you on the bed a few times."  They bounded up the stairs together.


Blair turned back to Todd.  "I missed you so much."  She went in for a long, lingering kiss.


"Hmm.  You're feeling better."


"I am, pretty much."


"Did Starr wait on you, hand and foot?"


"Yes.  She really did."


"Good.  Jack has an appointment with Ray tomorrow morning."  Todd beamed.


"You did it!  I knew you would."  She hugged him again.


"Now, one more thing I have to take care of before we settle in for a long winter's nap."  Todd said, grabbing his jacket and heading out.  He wanted to get something established with the new story, and then hibernate with Blair, caring for her until she was back on her feet and safe.




***


He headed back to The Break Bar, in hopes of catching Jessica in the act, and if he played his cards right, find out something about this prostitution in the back room.  He entered the bar, hung around the front for a while and then, made his way to the pool table area.  A man, who must have been a regular, recognized him.  "Hey, you, how was your night with that hot blonde?  She was a looker, eh?"


"Great action, just great."  He realized he wasn't lying, remembering their time in the limo, before they got home and had the baby scare.  He pushed down the memory of that, and went on.


He headed through the curtain door, looking side to side to see if anyone was watching, and took the opening to duck in.  Walking into the hallway a few steps, he found the infamous door leading to the den of iniquity.  Before he had a chance to turn the knob, her heard voices, coming from within the room, and hid, again, behind the door as it opened.


"That little hottie, she was sweet.  So sweet."


"I'm glad you enjoyed it."  He recognized the manager's voice. "Come back another time, sir.  We'd be glad to have you back."


Todd felt bile rise in his throat.  Waiting for the manager to leave the area, he kept himself tight against the wall.  Finally, the manager left through the curtain door, and back to the floor of the bar.  Todd looked through the open door and saw a teeny blonde sitting on the lap of a man in a business suit.  Across the room in an arm chair, a brunette with a curvy shape lap danced for an elderly gentleman.  Well, Manning, it's now or never.


About to make his presence known and move into the sitting room, he saw another door open across the gathering area, and out walked a tall, middle-aged man, adjusting his tie.  The man was followed by Jessica, dressed in a black bustier, short black and white mini-skirt, garter belts, stockings and black stiletto pumps.  He immediately hid again, not before noticing the bright red lipstick she was wearing, knowing he couldn't go forward and take the risk of being recognized or revealing her identity to anyone else.


Instead, he made his way down the long, brown hallway and found a door marked 'exit' and left, walking into the parking lot, and deciding to wait.  Calling Williams, he had the man bring the car around, and they sat, in the limousine, waiting for Jessica to come out at the end of the night.  As much as he wanted to stop her from doing any more sexual favors, he had to be careful of how he approached the situation, and for her mental health, how he approached her.


Hours passed.  He called Blair and let her know he'd be very late, and returned his attention to the exit.  Several men had come through the back door, including Matt Hardy, the Managing Editor of The Banner, and the Assistant District Attorney.  Todd was furiously taking notes on his tablet, on occasion taking photos.  He continued watching for more exits from the metal door marked 'Loading Zone.'


Finally, close to 2:00 am, the door squeaked open and Jessica came out, walking in a slinky fashion toward the corner, apparently to hail a cab.  It was dark, and he thought how easy it would be for her to be attacked or get hurt alone at this time of night.  Suddenly, she stopped in her tracks, and after a few minutes, appeared to almost swoon, before she looked around, clearly frightened.  She pulled her top up higher and closed her coat around her, and looked from right to left with a pained expression.  He got out of the car and went to her, careful not to call her by her name.


"Hey," he said.


"Uncle Todd," Jessica said, quite disoriented.  She was shaking.


"Hi, Jessica.  Do you know why you're here?"


"Actually, no, I don't even remember..."  she looked down at her clothing.  "I'm dressed...." Horror struck her face.  "Oh my God," she said, and her knees gave way, him reaching out in time to catch her before she fell.


"Come on, let's go in my car and we can talk.  You can get off your feet."  He supported her and put his jacket around her shoulders.  She was shivering.


In the car, he opened a bottle of brandy and gave her a small amount to warm her.  She drank it, and wiped the tears from under her eyes.  She looked at him.  "I was Tess again, wasn't I?"


"I don't know.  I think so."


She broke down, and he put his arm around her shoulders.  She sobbed and he comforted her the best he could.  She finally got herself together, and she said, "How did you know I was here?  What was I doing?"


He chose his words carefully.  "Maybe you should wait and we can talk about this tomorrow."


"No, I need to know.  You've never beaten around the bush with me before."


"You were in the back room.  Do you remember any of that?"


"No.  Uncle Todd, what was I doing?"


"Truthfully, you were coming out of a locked room with a man, there were other girls there, too.  Everyone was entertaining men, including you, Jess."


As she leaned over, he predicted what was coming next and opened the door as she vomited outside the car.  "It's going to be okay," he heard himself say.


"Oh my God," she cried. "I don't remember any of that.  I was Tess, again."  She looked at her uncle, "Are you going to tell Mom and Dad?  They both have heart conditions, I don't want them upset."  She started crying again, "Oh God, my daughter and my baby.  Oh no,"  she covered her mouth with her hand.


"It's out now.  You can get help, and go to your doctor, what's his name?"


"Dr. Levin."


"Yes, Dr. Levin.  You go to him, and work on this.  It's going to be all right.  I've been there."


"What about Mom?"


"I'm not going to tell her as long as you go see your doctor, and if you help me."


"Help you with what?"


"The reason I am out here is to try and write an investigative expose on The Break Bar.  I ran into you accidentally.  I could use your help and I believe you can.  I'm looking to find out who's behind all this.  Someone has been using these clients to gather information for their own use.  There's blackmail involved, and that's all I know.  I'm not sure what it's about, but I know there's a story.  You want to help those other girls, don't you?"


"Yes."


"Then, will you help me?  I can come in as a client requesting you.  While there, I can investigate, you can talk with the other girls and find out anything that will lead us to the ringleader.  I won't tell Viki until your part in the story is done and you're well, if you want me to tell her at all.  But, I want you to heal."


She agreed to the plan.  Williams drove them to Llanfair, and on the way, she proceeded to fill him in on her life while he was gone; her divorce from Antonio, the death of Nash, and her having a new baby with Ford, who also recently died.  He lent his support and they parted with the agreement between them.  On the way home, he called Blair, and then hung up quickly, thinking better of it since it was almost 3:00 am.  He would tell her in the morning the events of the evening and his encounter with both Tess and Jess at The Break Bar.
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