The Fourth Life: Chapter 43

Todd was at the hospital, sitting by Blair as she slept, watching her breathe and wanting the clock to magically run back to the moments before it happened.


He looked around, and Sister Rebecca Katherine was praying.  He counted that as nothing new or different, and she had already given her testimony.  He had noticed, earlier, that she and Timothy were late, and felt a twang of disappointment that she had to sit toward the back of the room, away from them.  Blair said, "I need to put my legs out, Todd,"  uncomfortable with them bent in front of her.  He had purposely gotten them an aisle seat so that she could access the bathroom easier.  He helped her move her legs a slight bit into the aisle, as to stretch them.  Without thinking, he rested his hand on Blair's belly, rubbing it absently, in small circles.  He could feel Sommer moving, and found the small, round curve of her head.  To their left was John McBain, lips pursed, Patrick and Marty, intently watching Zeus on the stand, Tea, doing the same. 

Blair nudged him, looking up.  There was a sky light, made of stained glass, that let a plethora of light into the room.  It was ironic, the light that was pouring down in rays, through the colored panels, onto the darkness that was Carlo Hesser.  If he had not promised....he had a perfect shot at the back of the man's head.  Blair elbowed him gently, and said, in a small whisper, "Remember Sam, in the car that day?"  He smiled to himself.  Of course he did.  The words from Sam's mouth had burned into his memory, and had brought him through two dark times while he was in the clutches of Leona that past year, one of which had given him the strength to fight for his life in the most important moment of it.  


He closed his eyes a moment, feeling the warmth of his wife next to him, and the baby, pushing her little foot against the inside of Blair, and sighed.  "This isn't so bad, is it Manning? You'll be all right," he thought to himself, and then was startled back to reality when Sister Rebecca Katherine screamed, "There in the balcony!  Duck down Mr. Zeus!"  in her undeniable accent, and the attention of everyone shifted.  Tea screamed, and Todd rushed to his feet, distracted by the noises and the urge to look up.  Seeing nothing, his eyes fell back to the court; two shots were fired, Zeus was on the ground, and he sprung up, wanting to get Blair out of there.

"Oh my God, he's been shot!"  Tea shrieked in piercing tones, as she ran to Zeus, and a sick feeling was in his stomach, watching her.

He turned to Blair, and trying to get her to her feet, said, "Babe, come on, let's get out of here," then noticed her position.  She was slumped over the chair at an awkward angle.  When he moved around her to see her face, and knelt before her in the aisle, he saw that her lavender suit was splattered with blood.  Panicking, he yelled, "Someone get an ambulance!" and Viki, Timothy and Sister Rebecca Katherine ran to them.  

He remembered hearing commotion, but it sounded like it was in a metallic tube, like being in an MRI.  He heard Viki, "Oh my God, was she hit?"


He said, "Babe, talk to me.  Please?"  He felt as if his own life were leaving him.


Blair looked up to him just then, and said, "I don't know why I'm here," she said.

He thought to himself, "Neither do I..." regretting...


The EMTs pushed everyone away, but he pushed back, possibly elbowed at least one of them out of the way.  He heard his ragged, strained voice, "You're okay.  Stay with me."

He saw her eyes moving to the ceiling, and his fear peaked.  Water came to his eyes, as she said, "It's daylight.  There's God coming down, Todd."

He sobbed once and said, "No, there's no God coming down, look at me, Babe, look at me."

As the EMTs worked on her, he had said, "I know I deserve the worst, but please, not this.  Blair, don't leave me."


His memory was interrupted by a knock on the door.  Turning, he saw Timothy, with Starr and Jack, Sam and Little Ray.  He'd asked him to bring them, thinking that it might jar her out of her misery.  She slept, so he signaled them to be quiet, and went into the hall to greet them.  He said, "Hey kids, Timothy."


Starr immediately felt nauseous.  Her father looked as if he was dying himself.  He was thinner, somehow, his beard was growing in.  His eyes were tired, pained and haunted.  She immediately reached for him, and in her embrace, said, "I'm so sorry, Dad."


He closed his eyes, shutting out the thoughts of his baby daughter, her head against his hand through Blair's skin.  "Thank you."  He was determined to meet up with Marty Saybrooke's standards.  The one thing he could control was what kind of father he was, and he aimed to be the best one he could.  He would be strong, and be there for them and his wife.


He said, "Hey, Jack."  


Jack went to him, this time, and hugged him, giving that masculine hard slap on the back.  Jack said, "Hi, Dad.  How's Mom?"


"She's sleeping.  She's very down."  He turned his attention to Sam, "Hey super Spidey!"


Sam ran to his legs, but Todd caught him in time to lift him into his arms, and rest him on his hip.  Sam said, "I said a lot of prayers for Mom and you, Dad."


"Well, thank you, Sam."  He knew it was the influence of Sister 'Becca Thrin,' and he smiled to himself.  Then, he noticed Starr was carrying Little Ray in his seat, and he put Sam down.  A feeling he could never have described came over him, when he took the little baby, and unstrapped him, and bringing him close, let him rest, cuddling on his shoulder, with his little hand, once again, curled under his chin.  He closed his eyes, and walked away from them for a moment, smelling his baby smell and soaking in the warm, slight weight against his chest.  Water came to his eyes, and he kissed the baby's head.  "I love you, Little Guy.  Mommy needs you, so much."


At that moment, he knew he had done the right thing bringing them.  He went back and handed off Little Ray to Starr, who shot him a knowing glance.  "I know," she said, "I thought the same thing.  Let's see what we can do."


He went back in to Blair's room, and shook her very gently, and said, "You have visitors."


She sat up, with his help.  Her face brightened when she saw Jack come into the room, followed by Starr, who was holding Ray, and Little Sam.  "Hi," she said, smiling.


Jack bent to kiss her cheek, "Hi, Mom, how are you feeling?"


"I feel better, Jack, now that you're all here."


Starr crossed to her, handing Ray off to Jack.  She hugged her mother, and for a moment, Blair did not pull back, so Starr, sitting in the chair, held her mother and let her lean there.  She could tell Blair was breaking down, and Jack, somehow seeing the scene for what it was, put his hand out to Sam and said, "Let's go for a walk a minute."  Todd stood fast in the doorway, Timothy beside him, and watched his daughter, his Starr, his Shorty, comfort her mother.  Starr said, "I'm so sorry, Mom," and he heard Blair weep.  After a few minutes, Blair finally pulled back.  "Where's Sam?"


Timothy said, "I'll get him."


Todd said, "Blair, you look better today.  You look rested."


She said, "I'd like to say the same for you, but I can't.  Todd, you look awful, you have to take care of yourself."


He said, "I am.  This is how I want to look."


She rolled her eyes, and turned back to Starr.  "He's so...Todd."


Sam appeared at the door.  "Mommy!"


She turned to him and said, "Sam, I'm so glad to see you."


"I wont jump on you, like Timothy said, because I'm heavy.  I'm bigger now."


"All right, but can you hug me?"


"Yeah!"  He walked to his mother and put his head right on her chest, and she put her arms around him.  "I missed you," she said.  Jack stood beside her, Little Ray perched in his arms, now awake, looking from person to person in the room.  He cooed and pointed toward her.


Jack said, "You want Mommy?"


She said, "No, Jack, not right now, I can't support his weight, maybe in a few days," and she turned away from him.  Todd took note of the strange way she behaved toward Ray, and looked at Timothy, who demonstrated a slight shrug.  He had seen it, too.  She was rejecting her baby, and Todd could only be worried at the prospect of the 'why.'


***


"There's a reward in The Sun today for any clues that lead to the arrest of the shooter," Patrick said, arriving early to transport Marty to the courthouse.


"Todd.  That's something he would do."


"Think it will work?"


"Not sure.  Who could have known anything?  The way that happened, it was like something out of a nightmare, Patrick.  Everything was quiet and the sun was shining down, and the next thing, it was all shattered by the sound the shots.  It was horrific.  Poor Blair."


Patrick nodded, "It was a horrible scene.  Clues will be far and in between," Patrick said, "Whoever did this knew a great deal about what he was doing."


"I have to admit, I'm a little nervous about today."  Marty said.


"That's all right, Angel."


"Do you think I helped?  Last night, with Todd?"

"I don't know if anything can free that man from himself, but it was worth the try."


"I hope he heard me," she said, grabbing her sweater.  She said, "Patrick, the shooting.  It stays in my mind.  You know?"


"Yes, I know."


"Well, we're off.  How did you get John to let you be my escort?"


Patrick teased, "It cost a pretty penny, but I managed."


At the courthouse, people were assembling as before.  They were early, and went inside.  Marty's eye caught a dark stain on the floor where Blair had lain, bleeding out her child's life.  She stopped a moment, and then kept walking.  Patrick had her hand, and they moved into a row of seats toward the front.  They were among the first to testify that day.


Patrick knew he had done right to tell Marty everything he knew about Todd Manning's experiences for the past nine years.  In doing so, he now accepted, he was helping her heal, and hopefully, Todd as well.  Sister Rebecca Katherine appeared at the back of the room, searching the crowd for Todd.  Not finding him, she approached them and sat.  "Good morning, Mr. Thornhart, Ms. Saybrooke."


"You may as well call us Patrick and Margaret." he said,  "We've all been through so much together, last names seem too formal."


"Patrick and Margaret it is," and turned to see Todd, clean shaven and dressed in a navy blue suit and pale peach shirt.  She waved slightly, and he caught her eye, winking at her and coming their way.  He moved into the row, next to Sister Rebecca Katherine, and said, "Here we are."


"I know this is hard for you, my boy.  It's going to be tough, but then, you're a tough cookie."


"Tough cookie?  Where's that from, 1946?"


"I'll have you know, I was not born in 1946."


"Oh, really, I'm sorry.  1947, then."


She kissed his cheek, "My dear, how is your wife today?"


Todd brushed off the question, saying, "That's a conversation for later.  Let's get through this first."


She whispered, "You can do this."  He closed his eyes a moment, pretending he could feel Blair at his side, but she wasn't there.  It was the strangest feeling he'd ever had, and he pushed it away and focused on the day.  Opening his eyes, he spotted Hesser, being brought in, in chains, in a tailored sharkskin suit and wingtip shoes.  He felt pressure in his chest, and for a moment, a flash went through his mind of cracking the bald skull with a chair.  He pulled himself back to reality, and breathed out a long sigh.

Patrick noticed the tenseness in Todd's body, and couldn't deny he had some of his own.  Todd's fists were clenched, his teeth were fixed against each other.  Patrick could see his jaw working, and he reached across the nun and touched Todd's arm, saying, "Brother, we're in this together now."


For a reason he could not explain, Todd became calm.  Marty had forgiven him: really forgiven him.  Sister Rebecca Katherine was there for support.  Patrick was beginning to grow on him, and treat him like a friend, if that were humanly possible, and Carlo Hesser was about to go on the ride of his life.


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