The Fourth Life: Chapter 51

"Let's go, McBain, there has to be something."  John searched through the various files that the records department sent to him.  Perusing them, there was nothing more eventful than what he already knew about Timothy Broderick.  The man had lived in Ireland for years, was born there, and lost his brother many years back.  "Is the death of a brother years back enough to fuel a killing?"  Todd walked in the door, again without knocking.  McBain finished his thought saying, "It might depend on the person.  Manning, you can knock."


"I can, but I didn't.  I want to know what you are doing to find the person who killed our baby.  Our baby, mine and Blair's.  She's still not recovered.  Where's the killer?  And what has this precinct been doing about it?"


"Upset, are we?"  John pursed his lips.


"Yeah, you could say that.  Blair's broken, she's trying to get through every day without falling apart.  It's..." he stopped.  "Did you find anything?"


"Nothing."


Todd slumped into the chair.  "Sorry, I was a little, well, hot-headed there."


"No harm done.  Just don't throw me on the ground and pummel my head."


"Point taken.  She's miserable, John.  I feel like, if we knew something about who did this, it could help her."


"It would help you.  Not sure Blair's quite the same."


"We would have to wait and see.  So when is an arrest going to be made?"


"Todd, I don't have anything.  Not a fleck of anything."


"Track is dry?"


"Bone dry."


"You seemed really into something when I walked in."


"Hesser's murder."


"Anything there?"


"Nothing.  I just have a suspect list about as long as my arm."


"I can imagine why.  Am I on it?"


"You know you were with me when this happened.  In court.  Pretty hard to smother him from there."


"Is Blair?"  He didn't answer at first, just kept tossing papers on his desk.  "I know you heard me, McBain."


"Todd, I can't discuss this with you, and you know that."


"Fine, I don't suppose you need my help, so I'm going to get going, then."


"Maybe you can help.  What do you know about Timothy Broderick?"


Todd was uneasy.  "Not much.  Probably what you know."


John shuffled his papers.  "I am hitting one dead end after another."


"No good."  Todd said, when he truthfully didn't care at all about finding Hesser's killer.  In fact, it made him feel sick in the pit of his stomach when he thought about it.  He stood up.  "I'm going to go."


"All right.  If anything about Timothy or any other aspect of this case comes up, let me know."


"Sure, John.  Please don't forget about Sommer.  She was a person, John, and she's gone."  And he left the office.


He walked to the limo, and started to call to secure his next plan.   He had already arranged, back when she died, to have Sommer buried in a plot he had purchased for his family.  Not much into formalities, he had done it anyway; he had gone and purchased an entire plot, under a shady tree along a lake at a nearby cemetery.  


Since Blair had been slowly moving past it, with baby steps and caution, and as difficult as it was, it was time.  He had arranged a small service, at graveside, with Blair's favorite flowers overflowing, for later that week, and had warned the people in charge that if it were not a bright and beautiful day, he would pay for cancellation and rescheduling.  He hadn't told her yet, and that was his next step.


Finishing the call to the florist for the final arrangements, he said, "Williams, to the diner."  Nothing would have sat better than a cheeseburger and fries right about then.


***


Sister Rebecca Katherine rang the bell at Unforgettable, and Blair appeared at the door, with Baby Ray on her shoulder.  "Sister, how nice to see you."


"And you, dear.  It's been some time.  How are ya?"


"I'm doing better.  Please come in."  Blair stepped back and let the nun come into the house, and closed the door after her.  "How are you feeling, Sister?"


"I'm just a bit under the weather, I believe a spring allergy had gotten a grip on me.  Of course, I am headed for better now, and have not had a bout of sneezing for a few days."


"Well, that's something."  She fussed over Ray's little face.  "What can I do for you, Sister?"


"Ah nothing dear, I came to see how you're doing, and get a glance at this little one."


"He's growing," she said, "isn't he?"


"That he is, dear.  How are ya doing, Blair, really?"


Her eyes misted over, and she said, "Better.  It's still so very hard.  Todd is my saving grace; he's been there for me since the first moment.  He's helped me see some things, and I'm trying to move forward.  It's the hardest thing, Sister."


"I am sure it is, dear.  Never having had a baby of my own, I can tell ya it seems like something powerful to have missed.  At the same time, you've been fortunate enough to have the experience of it several times over.  What beautiful children ya have.  You're a lucky girl."


"Yes, lucky.  In some ways, I think that's true, even though we've faced a lot of hardships.  Look at him," she held up Ray, "he's just so precious.  We love him so much."


"Yes, indeed.  A special little piece of love, aren't ya little one," she put out her arms, and Blair handed him off to the nun.  Sister Rebecca Katherine smiled and played peekaboo games with Ray, as Blair sat and watched.  At that moment, they were greeted at the door by Todd, who was just coming in. 


"Hey, look who's here?"  Todd said.


"Did you find anything out?"  Blair asked as he leaned to kiss her.  


He went to the sister, and kissed her also, on the cheek.  "No, McBain has nothing, as I figured.  Still working on it.  He's more focused, I can tell, on that Hesser murder."  Both Blair and Rebecca Katherine said nothing in response to it.  After a few moments, the nun gave the baby back to Blair, and Todd said, "I have to talk to you about something, Blair.  Sister, you can stay, might need you for reinforcement."


"Okay, so it's bad, whatever it is?"  Blair said.


"No, not bad.  Just something we have to do.  I want you to trust me, Blair."  Todd answered her.


Though her heart was pounding in her chest, she said, "I do trust you.  More than I've trusted anyone."


"Later this week, we're going to have a service for Sommer.  It's not anything big, just a small graveside funeral."


He saw her expression change.  It was as if someone had reached in and twisted her heart.  She said, "A funeral?"


"Yes.  Sommer was a person, a real child.  She deserves this," he said.


The sister said, "I might not be correct in jumping in this one, but I agree with ya, Todd.  She's a little human being, and she needs to be put to rest."


Blair got a very far away look in her eyes.  "She almost could have lived outside me."  Her hand went absently to her stomach.  "She was definitely a person.  She had her own personality, remember Todd?"


"No one kicked like her," he said.


"She was such an active baby," Blair said, teetering on tears.


The nun said, "Well, of course, look at the family she comes from!  All of you can barely be still!"  She stood up, and went to Blair taking the baby from her.  She perched him on her hip and walked about, talking to him, and then slowly drifted to the back patio and brought him into the sunlight.


Blair looked at her husband, and he said, "Are you angry with me?"


She said, "No, I'm not.  I am grateful you did all this, Todd.  When did you get all this done?"


"I insisted she was interred when she passed.  Back then, you were blaming me for taking her from you.  I couldn't talk about it with you.  I did the best I could.  I knew it would be a while before you were able to face it.  I purchased a family plot.  I've arranged everything."


She thought about it.  "I was so wrong to do that to you.  I still regret it.  You needed me.  You were grieving, too."


"It's not your fault.  You didn't mean it, couldn't do anything more.  You really believed what you were saying.  I knew that.  I just wanted you to get better."


She walked to him, touching his shirt.  "I see you went to the diner.  A speckle of ketchup.  You can't seem to get through one of their burgers without it."


He smiled, and took her hand.  "Well, I'm just a slob sometimes.  What can I say?"


She looked directly into his eyes, and said, "You can say whatever you like, because I'm the one who has to talk."


"All right."


"You are a wonderful husband, Todd.  You are a fantastic father.  You take care of all of us, and I thank you for that," and she stepped close to him and kissed him gently.  She hugged him, and put her head over his shoulder, turning to sniff his hair and breathe him in.  She was fortunate; as hard as it was to see it, she was indeed lucky.


***


The morning of the memorial service came, and Blair was having difficulty getting dressed.  Todd was there for her, helping her pick just the right thing, and assisting her with dressing.  In moments when she felt she could not go on, he was right there to pick her up and move her along.  In moments when he was faltering, emotionally overtaken, she would do the same for him.  They leaned on each other, and he realized that things were improving for her, and that with a bit more time, she would emerge whole.


Sam, in his little black suit, came into their bedroom.  "Is someone going to tie this tie?  Jack won't do it, he's mad at me."


"Jack is not mad at you,"  Todd said, "He's just a teenager.  Remember this when you get there,"  he reached down and did the tie for the little boy.  "There.  Better?"


"Mom?  Are we going to say bye to Sommer?"  Sam asked.


Blair looked down at her son, and smiled through her tears.  "Yes, we are."


Todd stepped in, "Yep, buddy, now go and get those shoes on, the ones I shined up for you."


Sam skipped out of the room, and Blair ended up in Todd's arms.  "Can we do this?"


"Yes.  Yes we can," he said, into her ear, softly but assuredly.


The day was perfect; the sun was out, the sky was clear and bluer than McBain's eyes.  They gathered by the small, rose quartz marble stone that Todd had gotten for her, of a small child in summer.  The little carved girl's hair was blowing in the summer wind, she was wearing a sundress, and holding a picture hat in her hand, and a bouquet of wildflowers in the other.  The little figure stood about a foot and a half high.  Blair cried when she saw it, and he put his arm around her shoulders and held her strong against him.


Jack, Starr, and Sam were dressed in black, also accompanying their parents.  Sister Rebecca Katherine and Timothy walked up to the site, getting out of her limousine.  Also attending were Addie, Shaun, John McBain, Natalie, Jessica, Devon, and Viki.  Todd turned quickly to the side and saw Patrick Thornhart approaching.  Blair caught Patrick's eye and crumbled, as he walked in front of her and put his arms around her to comfort her.  When Patrick let go, she immediately fell back against Todd, who kept his strength and composure.


After a few words said by the minister, each person took a pink rose and lay it at the feet of the statue.  Most said nothing, and a few dropped a few words:  Starr said, "I wish I could have met you, little sister,"; Sam said, "Goodbye Sommer,": Jack said nothing.  Others placed their flower silently, Viki said, "God bless you, Little One."  


After this, Sister Rebecca Katherine said The Lord's Prayer, and most joined in.  Todd studied the little figurine, and imagined another 'Starr' when he pictured Sommer, except he saw Sommer as even fiestier than Starr was, somehow.  His eyes welled with tears as the nun came to the end of her prayer.  Slowly, the guests paid their respects and turned to go.  Blair was leaning against Todd, as if he was keeping her from falling, which, he realized later, he probably was.  She was silent, but sobbing, and still clutching her pink rose.  When everyone had cleared out of the grave site, Todd turned to her and said, "You don't have to put the flower down.  Only if you want to."  


She walked forward, holding her rose in her hand, and without warning, she collapsed to her knees by the stone.  He went down with her, purposely, holding his rose as well, waiting for her.  He gripped her by her shoulders as she finally let out a terrible wail, and broke down, putting the rose on the ground and falling against him.  "She's gone, Todd."  He shushed her, petted her, and kissed her forehead as she cried.  


Finally, when she quieted, he said, "Let's go now, okay?"


She nodded.  He placed his rose down and said in a shaking voice, "Goodbye, my little Sunburst.  I'll love you, always."


She cried against him for a few more moments, and then he stood, bringing her to her feet.  Williams was parked a few yards down the path, and Todd held his wife in his arm as he walked her to the car.


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