The Way Back: Chapter 13

"Are we there yet?" Sam said from the back of the stretch limo that Blair sent to get the family.

"No honey, we're not there yet. Almost." Addie responded.

"This is taking so long.  Starr, are we really going to see my friend there?  Is he really there with Mom?"

"Yes, Sam, he is."

"Good.  He'll protect her from any bad guys."

Jack shot a look to Starr.  "That's good Sam," he said aloud, "just in case."

Starr looked at Jack, feeling uneasy about their trek.  They had talked earlier about this man that came to town.  Jack seemed certain it was all going to be all right; she had felt doubts and fears about it.  She so wanted her mother to find her true love again, and at the same time, how would she ever face him?  She was partially responsible for him staying where ever he was for so long.

She fell for it.  She replaced her father with a sham.  She'd never quite understood how he had won her over, but he had.  And for that, her own father, if this man was him, gave up eight years of his life while they all enjoyed the fruits of the empire he built himself.  She was almost sickened at the thought of it.

"And, Sam, Starr, and I will be interested to meet him again and see what he's about."  Jack said.

"Is he really your dad, like my dad is to me?"

Jack took Starr's hand gently and gave it a little squeeze.  "Maybe.  We don't know until we get there and find out, do we?"

"Well, okay, but I am sure he's my friend.  I am sure he's a nice guy.  And he's a hero, Jack, he saved me."  Sam said.

Addie turned to the children, seeing Starr noticeably upset.  "Okay, let's talk about what we liked best in Disney World.  Who wants to go first?"

The conversation started going from Sam, to Jack, to Addie and around and around between them as they named things they loved.  Cinderella's castle.  Thunder Mountain Railroad.  Space Mountain (which Sam could not ride because he was too small), The Carousel of Progress.  The Pirates of the Caribbean.  The Beauty and the Beast Stage Show.  And at that, Starr burst into tears.

"My God, Starr, what is it?"  Addie asked her.

"Oh Grandma,"  she cried.  "Grandma, that used to be Mom and Dad's fairytale.  They always talked about it.  When he was gone, Mom read it to me and told me their romance.  And, when he was there, believe me, we lived it a lot of the time.  Oh, what did I do?"

Addie put her arms around Starr to shush her, and Jack moved strategically along the back of the stretch to get next to Sam and distract him from Starr's sadness.

Addie said in Starr's ear, "No matter what, Starr, your father loves you.  If that is your father, he will never stop loving you.  I knew that man for many years.  He loves you and he would forgive anything you did.  And, he would never blame you."

"What if I blame me?"  She sobbed.  Addie continued to whisper things of support to her.  Addie, in her wisdom, had plenty to say on the subject.  "I was there from the moment you were conceived.  They loved each other so much, all along.  He loved you more than he's loved anyone.  Ever.  He'd never blame you or let you take the blame, even if you wanted to."

"I don't want to, but it's obvious, isn't it?  I convinced everyone, even Mom."

"Starr, you were a child, who missed your father and best friend more than anything.  You wanted him to be there.  The man you called your father for the last eight years was the one who was wrong for lying to everyone, if that is what he did."

"What if this man is lying?  What if he's here to hurt us?"

"Starr, you must calm down.  Just wait and see.  I think you'll know, if you don't already, exactly who he is.  Can you do that for me?  Can you wait?"

"Yes, grandma, thank you.  I have to get it together for Sam.  And for Mom, too."

At the cabin, Todd and Blair were getting themselves packed and ready to return home.  "After the kids come and we talk, we can head back home,"  he said.

"All right, that sounds perfect.  Home.  I like the sound of that.  Are you sure you're ready for that?  After all, this is a lot for you to handle all at once.  Me, the kids, Sam, Addie, Viki and everything else.  That's a lot to take in."  She thought back to the evening before, when, after their beautiful day together, he had wanted to go over the photo albums again and get an explanation of each and every photo.  He had been overwhelmed with tears at times, and filled with a youthful joy at others.  They talked until the wee hours, planning their return to Llanview, and it was decided he would come to live at La Boulaie to be with her and the kids.  Before they knew it, they had fallen asleep on the couch in front of the fire.  It was bright and beautiful breakfast hour when they woke up.  It had been, after all, a long day with mountain air all around them, and the question of the future hanging in the air.

Soon, they heard the sound of tires on gravel as the stretch drove into the driveway outside the cabin.  "They're here!"  Todd was like a little kid, while Blair watched from the sink, as he raced to the door to greet them.

The door opened, and Sam came barrelling in first.  "Mom!  Mom!  Look, I got a Buzz Lightyear gun, and Jack and me went on a scary ride!"  He ran to Blair's arms.

"Oh, I missed you, my little man!  I love you!"  She hugged him close.  He turned and ran to Todd.

"Hi, Spiderman!" Sam said and put out his little hand to do the fist bump with his friend.

Todd obliged.  "Hey, Sam.  Good to see you, buddy!"

"Well, hello,"  Addie said, walking forward and extending her hand.

He took it.  "Addie."  He smiled.

She looked into his face and studied it.  She softly said, "My God.  I do believe there's been a terrible wrong here."

He, still holding her hand, whispered back, "nothing that you did, Addie."

She stared into his eyes, their hands still clasped in a handshake, "My God."  She looked to Blair, whose eyes were glistening, then back to Todd.  "Are you....are you all right?"

He didn't have time to answer.  "Momma, will you take Sam out for a little walk?  There's a beautiful stream nearby, with lots of things to explore."

Addie finally broke the eye contact between her and Todd.  "Sure."  Addie and Sam departed and a strange silence fell over the Mannings.

"So, you're my father?  I don't remember you."  Jack said, plopping down on the couch.

"I remember you, Jack,"  Todd began, sitting next to him, "and I can imagine what you really want to say to me."

"Todd..." Blair interrupted, worried about Todd's ability to manage the emotions of what was probably coming.

"You do?  Good, because I don't.  I don't know what to say to you at all."  Jack said, decidedly.  He crossed his feet on the coffee table.

"Your Aunt Viki wouldn't like that."  Todd said to Jack.

"Oh yeah?  What do you know about my Aunt Viki?"

"Everything.  She's my sister.  She and I have been through a lot together.  Let's just say, we have father issues, too."

Jack unfolded his arms and looked at Todd's face for the first time.  "You don't say.  What, your father was too rich for you?  Got you too much stuff?  Gave you a whole newspaper?"

Blair appeared to be holding back with all her might, but instead of chastising her son for his rudeness, she let Todd take the lead.  Starr was listening but seated across the room.  Her brother had chosen to make the start of this about him, and she was none-too-willing to allow it.

Todd thought for a moment.  "It seems that way, doesn't it?  But the truth is, Viki and I have the same father, but he did not raise me.  The man who raised me was a cruel and abusive man.  His name was Peter Manning, and he was not the kind of father who made life easy at all."

"So what did he do, ground you and stuff?"

"No.  Grounding would have been welcome.  He did other things...."

Blair sat beside Todd and gently took his hand.  She had to find a way to give him added strength.  "Jack, your father's adoptive father was a sick man.  Very abusive and hurtful.  He caused your father a great deal of pain,"  she said.

"Well, I'm sorry about all that.  But you caused me pain, too.  You gave me away, if you're really my father.  If you are him, you would be able to tell me why you did that."

Todd breathed deeply and sighed.  "Jack, you know, I can tell you why.  I was twisted up inside.  I was afraid.  I was scared your mother would never love me and I was scared of loving you.  I thought you were another man's child, and that's not an excuse for what I did, because there is none.  But, it's the reason I did it.  I was too cowardly to accept it otherwise.  When I found out you were mine, I did everything I could to bring you back.  And I lied, to your mother, and I hid your illness from her.  I did all of that because I was not a whole man.  I've made a lot of mistakes, but it doesn't mean I don't love you."

Blair noticed Jack's face softening, and his posture sinking a bit into the couch.  Todd continued, "Every day while I was gone, I repeated your name, your mother's, your sister's, over and over to myself."

"That makes no sense.  Why would you do that?"

Todd stopped for a moment.  "I can't explain all of it, but trust me, it made sense.  I was being held against my will, and the people who had me wanted information from me.  So I went through a lot of things that were difficult and sometimes made me feel like I might lose my mind.  So, I held on to the only thing I had and loved, and that was you three.  It was my way of coping,"  He paused, "Jack, look at me, can you?"

Jack acquiesced.  Todd continued, "I am sorry for what I did.  I can't take it back.  But, your mom forgave me, and I am so lucky that she did.  It's up to you if you want to forgive me or not, but believe me, I am your father."

Jack did not respond, but his eyes lingered on Todd's for a few additional moments.  "All right, so say you are.  If you are, then you'll be able to forgive us, right?"

Todd half smiled, "For what?"

"For anything.  Like, something we did wrong."  He shot a look to Starr, "or something we think we did wrong."  Jack got up and walked into the kitchen, spying in the cabinet for something to eat.

Todd caught the glance across the room, and met Starr's tearful gaze.  "Shorty, what's wrong?" Starr began crying, putting her hand over her mouth.  "Hey, come here," he said, patting the couch next to him.

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